upworthy

Family

Family

Mom goes viral after sharing her experience with Idaho's baffling new public library law

"My heart broke."

@carlyjdot/TikTok

Carly Anderson went viral on TikTok after sharing her experience of Idaho's new library law.

Idaho's House Bill 710, signed into effect on July 1 2024, is the end result of years of attempts by the state’s legislature to restrict library access. This bill requires that libraries relocate items deemed “harmful” by anyone who fills out a form to a restricted “adults-only” area. Failing to do so within 60 days puts libraries in danger of being sued for $250, as well as “actual damages and any other relief.”

For those who want to venture into the restricted area: you must be 18 or older, have an unrestricted library card… or be accompanied by your parent or legal guardian who must sign an affidavit every time you come to the library. If your skin is starting to crawl just reading this, wait until you hear from a mom who has experienced it firsthand.

In a now-viral TikTok video, Carly Anderson, a mom of three living in Idaho Falls, Idaho, shared what happened when she took her 11-year-old daughter to the library to get a copy of “Fellowship of the Ring,” after just having finished “The Hobbit.”

As they went upstairs to the adult section, they noticed the new sign with the whole spiel about needing an unrestricted library card or affidavit.

Okay, no problem: Anderson shows both her ID and her daughter's library card. Should be smooth enough sailing from here.

But that’s when the librarian stopped her.

“Why don't they let me? Because I'm holding a baby, my 1-year-old."

That’s right, even her baby (who can’t read yet!) needed a “library card or I signed an affidavit.”

"So me and Daphne just watched from the edge while Scarlett goes in to find her book. The librarian ended up helping her,” Anderson said.


@carlyjdot Coming to a library near you 😭 #library #greenscreen #scarletttok #bookban #momtok #lordoftherings #harrypotter #project2025 #librariesoftiktok ♬ original sound - Carly


It’s worth noting that Anderson made it clear that she doesn’t blame the “nice and patient” librarians for this mess, who seem just as “sick of it” as everyone else, and who seemed to “feel so bad turning kids away from going into the library."

And while, in the end, Anderson’s kid did get the book she needed, here “heart broke” and the thought of other knowledge-hungry kids who wouldn’t be so lucky.

"What about these kids that aren't coming in with parents? What about the Matildas out there that literally come to the library to just read, read, and read and then gain superpowers because they're Matilda? What about the Hermiones out there that find amazing answers because they go into the Restricted Section of the library?"

As one viewer sadly noted, “The Matildas and Hermiones won’t even know who Matilda and Hermione are because they’re not allowed into the library to get their books."

Sadder still, Anderson added in a follow-up video that “some of the smaller community libraries have been closed since July 1 because they just don't have the funding to restructure a library like this, or the funding to get sued every time someone gets offended."

Anderson then rattled off a long list of folks who will be very negatively impacted by this new law: marginalized groups, smaller communities, kids that don't get to come in with their parents, grandparents taking their grandchildren, teenagers looking for answers about eating disorders and abuse…just to name a few.


@carlyjdot Replying to @stephdykman Giving more detail on why Idaho libraries are hurting right now. Spread the word so we can change this! #parttwo #librarytiktok #booktok #bookban #project2025 #vote ♬ original sound - Carly

It’s no surprise that at only a month in, Bill 710 has already drawn passionate criticism. Just last week, a lawsuit to stop enforcement of the bill was filed on behalf of three schools, four parents, the Community Library Association and Collister United Methodist Church, under the claim that it violates first amendment rights.

As Anderson rightly puts it, "Thank you to our Idaho librarians for putting up with this nonsense." And folks were equally right to let this story be a reminder to vote in November…lest we slip into a real life Fahrenheit 451 situation.


This article originally appeared last year.

From Your Site Articles
policy
Family

When should parents stop tracking kids? 7 ways to balance safety with autonomy and privacy.

Location sharing apps have led to uncharted territory for parents.

Photo credit: Canva

Parents can always know where their kids are these days. When should that stop?

Every generation of parents has had to navigate questions previous parents never even had to think about, especially in the technological age. It began with television—How much TV time is too much?—then moved to video games, the internet, smartphones, and so on. And one of the newest conundrums parents have to figure out is when—or if—to stop tracking their children's location.

Thanks to GPS and location sharing apps, parents now have the ability to know where their child (or at least their child's phone) is at any given moment, and lots of parents are taking advantage of it. A recent study by iSharing found that 80% of parents tracked their children in 2024, up from 16% in 2016. Location tracking can provide some peace of mind for parents and kids alike, but at what point is it too much?

It may make sense to always know where your middle schooler or high schooler is, but there are big debates about whether college students need to have their location known at every moment. Some find location tracking into the young adult years to be an invasion of privacy. Others have had experiences where having location sharing enabled was a life-saving tool. Is there a right answer?

When it's framed as a tool for trust rather than control, location tracking can be good for parent-child relationships. Here are 7 tips the experts at iSharing compiled from their study of how to responsibly use location tracking while balancing safety and autonomy:

Tip 1: Understand How Common Tracking Is Among Parents

Tracking tools are now a widely adopted parenting aid, with 54% of parents frequently monitoring their children’s location. This significant increase reflects evolving safety concerns and growing accessibility to technology. Parents who understand why tracking has become so prevalent—such as managing multiple children or addressing safety in public spaces—can implement these tools more thoughtfully.

Where Are You Im Waiting GIFGiphy

Tip 2: Start with Clear Boundaries and Communication

When implementing location tracking, have an open discussion with your child. Experts recommend that parents clearly define when and why tracking will be used, such as during travel or emergencies. Transparency helps children understand that the goal is safety, not constant monitoring. For instance, families can agree to deactivate tracking during school hours or social outings, creating a sense of autonomy. When introducing location tracking, frame it as a tool for mutual safety. Be prepared to answer their questions, such as explaining why tracking is necessary for specific situations, not constant oversight, and reassuring them about privacy by setting boundaries like deactivating tracking during certain times.

Tip 3: Use Tracking to Teach Life Skills

Framing location tracking as a teaching tool can empower children. For example, parents can teach navigation skills by helping children choose the safest routes, discuss emergency readiness by identifying safe locations and practicing response plans, and introduce digital literacy concepts, such as understanding app permissions and managing online privacy. This approach helps children view tracking as a growth-oriented resource rather than a restriction.

Location Gps GIF by AboutMedia Internetmarketing GmbHGiphy

Tip 4: Choose Reliable Apps Thoughtfully

Parents often struggle with tracking without infringing on their child's privacy. It's essential to set limits on the data collected and explain its use. When selecting a tracking app, look for features like secure encryption, geofencing, and clear data-sharing policies. Apps offering additional tools, such as personalized location reports or alerts for unsafe driving behaviors, can help parents ensure their child’s safety beyond just location tracking. Features like these help teens understand their weaknesses, such as harsh braking or speeding, and take steps to improve safely.

Tip 5: Educate Children About Location Sharing Risks

Teach children the risks of oversharing their location, whether on social media or through unverified apps. Use age-appropriate examples to explain how location data can be misused, such as by strangers or cybercriminals. Encourage them to share their location only with trusted individuals. This awareness is especially critical as 30% of adult social media users have at least one account set to share their location in posts automatically.

Tip 6: Gamify Location Tracking for Engagement

Gamification can transform location tracking into an engaging experience for children and teens. For example, parents can create family missions where children navigate to specific safe locations, award digital badges for safe practices such as consistent check-ins or adhering to agreed boundaries, or use friendly competitions to encourage responsible behavior, such as discovering the safest routes or maintaining safe driving habits. By integrating playful elements, tracking can promote safety while keeping it enjoyable for children.

Warning T-Rex GIF by Meta DigitalGiphy

Tip 7: Adapt Tracking Practices to the Child's Age

Tracking practices should evolve as children grow older to balance safety with their need for independence. Research shows that 50% of teens report their parents monitoring their location, while nearly half of college students have experienced or currently experience digital tracking by a parent or caregiver. However, college students who are tracked often perceive their parents as overly controlling, which can strain the parent-child relationship and hinder the development of independence. Adjusting tracking practices over time helps foster trust and supports a child’s growing independence.

“Technology should serve as a bridge, not a barrier, to trust and connection within families," says a representative of iSharing. "When parents approach tools like location tracking with transparency and mutual respect, they not only enhance safety but also model the importance of balance between independence and accountability. The goal is to integrate these tools in ways that align with values of trust, respect, and open communication, ensuring they complement rather than complicate family dynamics.”

From Your Site Articles
parenting
Family

People are sharing the parenting trends that absolutely ‘need to end now’

Here are 21 of the best responses.

via Pexels

Not all trends in parenting are a good thing.

It’s tough to quantify whether today’s parents are stricter or more permissive than previous generations, but the overall sentiment seems to be that parents are more lenient than they were a few decades back.

A 2015 poll by YouGov found that younger Americans are more likely than their elders to have been raised by “not very strict” or “not at all strict” parents. Thirty-nine percent of under-30s say that their parents weren't very strict or not strict at all, compared to only 15% of over-65s.

Nicola Kraus, author of The Nanny Diaries, believes that it’s a natural outgrowth of the fact that we know a lot more about children than we did in the past.

“We are deeply aware that our children are cognizant, conscious humans in a way previous generations weren't aware. Children were treated like pets or, worse, release valves for their parents' stresses and fears, then expected to magically transform into healthy, functional adults,” she writes.

But this change in parenting has encouraged other trends that many think are creating a greater number of entitled young adults who can’t fend for themselves. These days we have helicopter parents, bulldozer parents, and dependent parents whose overinvolvement in their children’s lives renders them incapable of becoming fully integrated adults.

Reddit user u/qquackie asked the online forum,"What parenting 'trend' do you strongly disagree with?" and got an overwhelming number of responses from people who think that today's parents are raising entitled children. Many of the responders think that parents are being too sensitive with their children and they don’t provide firm boundaries. They also think it’s a big problem for kids to think they’re the center of the universe.

Here are 21 of the most popular responses to the parenting question.

1. Pretending that not parenting is parenting

"I won't tell my child to stop kicking your leg repeatedly because i don't want to crush his spirit!' — StoicDonkey

2. ​Denying your kid any negative experiences or emotions

"They are a normal part of being a person, teach them to handle negative emotions now before you send them out into a world they are not prepared to handle." — IAmRules

3. Fake “gentle parenting”

"You hear and see so many parents letting their children do whatever they want, no matter how destructive, rude or hurtful their behaviours are. Parents find themselves beholden to the whims of their childrens’ emotions in the name of gentle parenting, instead of true gentle parenting where (so I hear) boundaries are set alongside validating emotions." — candianuk

4. Not setting clear boundaries

"You are the adult, not the kid. Children benefit sooo much more from clear rules and consequences." — NorthWeight3580

5. The “bulldozer” parent

"The parent who removes all obstacles/challenges from a child’s life so they don’t learn about perseverance, problem solving, failure (sometimes you can try hard and still not get the reward) and learning from mistakes - unless the goal is to develop a highly anxious person - then, being a bulldozer parent is great." — spinefexmouse

6. Stage-mom syndrome

"Abusing the talents of your child just to boost your self image in society." — sweettooth_92

7. Nonstop supervision

"Hovering over them at every turn. Whatever happened to tossing them in a play area in another room and letting them create, explore, and get the occasional bumps?" — ansibley

8. Not believing the teacher

"'My kid never lies to me.' Seriously. Parents absolutely should be their kid’s biggest supporter. But support sometimes means holding the kid responsible when they don’t do the right thing." — jdith123

9. "No talking back!"

"If this also counts... Parents who punish their kids for speaking up or otherwise explaining something, saying that they're 'talking back.' I honestly don't get why most parents refuse to admit they're not always right sometimes. Besides, what if their kid one day comes up to them and says another adult is touching them inappropriately?" — EntryRepresentative5

10. Helicopter parenting

"Kids need freedom to explore the world, get dirty, engage in free play. I am not advocating putting the child outside on a Saturday morning and telling them to come home when the street lights come on, but an age acceptable level of freedom." — Cat_Astrophe_X

11. Pushing them too hard

"Pushing them too hard in sports, academics, etc. Like pushing til they need therapy or get injured, no free time, no downtime. FFS, they only get to be young & without excessive responsibilities once." — Oh-Oh-Ophelia

12. Tablets in public

"Loud cartoons and games on tablets in public places." — StarrCreationsLLC

13. Potty training too late

"Oh man, I’m a nanny and work in daycare. I can talk so much about this. One is late potty training. Waiting to potty train a child is more and more common. Which I generally agree with. Wait until they’re 2.5-3 and knock it out. Some take longer, some are probably ready earlier. Better than rushing it and causing issues. What this has turned into. Not potty training. I nanny a 4 year old that is still in pull ups. She is more than capable of using the potty. Our 4 year old classroom just installed a diaper genie because so many 4 year olds are starting preschool in diapers. My best friend who is a Kindergarten teacher had 2 kids start kindergarten in diapers. Luckily they’re potty trained now." — cleaning-meaning

14. Kids on social media

"Creating social media channels for your children where they proceed to upload videos and photos of their kids. Perfect place for pedophiles." — AJSK18

15. Too much structure

​"I guess the overall trend of prioritizing academics/extracurriculars and college admissions over everything else. Give your kids some chores and let them hang out with their friends outside of structured sports and musical activities!" — hausfrau224

16. Tablet addiction

"Constantly giving your kid(s) a tablet or cellphone to keep them busy because you can't be bothered to actually be a parent or pay attention to them." — ZRuneDemonX

17. Letting the kid make all the choices

"I believe kids should have reasonable choices, like what their snack is and the character that's on their bedspread, but you can't let your 3 year old decide when you're allowed to leave your house. The world doesn't work that way." — cihojuda

18. Silence

"Saying 'what goes on in this house, stays in this house.' I know hundreds of victims of abuse, go through years of pain because of this phrase." — Dixie_Maclant

19. Birthdays

"The social media trend that keeps upping the expectations for birthday parties and any celebration connected to a kid. When I was a kid, birthdays consisted of a handmade invitation made by me, a cake from the grocery store, food that my Mom cooked and then inviting some friends and family over for games. Today's expectation is that every monthversary and half-birthday consist of a huge arch of balloons that will end up in the trash, a customized three-tier fondant cake, gift wrapping that color-coordinates with the themed party favors and of course, a very intentional outfit for the numerous photo ops that will take up most of the day. Anything for the 'gram, right? Don't even get me started on gender reveal announcements." — littlebunsenburner

20. Parent, not friend

"Trying to be your kid's 'friend,' not a parent. A parent is there to provide guidance and responsible behavior to model. Yes, sometimes making their actions have consequences and setting boundaries can be difficult and they'll not be too happy with you. That's part of the job. Ultimately I think that will result in a healthier relationship than being the "cool" permissive parent. I've seen results of that style of (not) parenting with very sad outcomes." — DataPlenty

21. You're not special

"Perpetuating the myth that one's children are somehow special. With about 97% certainty, they are not. Teaching them that they are just sets them up for crushing disappointment down the road. It's far better to raise kids to believe they are ordinary people with a few gifts, but also some flaws and weaknesses." — AssistantToTheSensei


This article originally appeared two years ago.

From Your Site Articles
parenting
Family

Technology expert shares the one message that can get teens to rethink their screentime

“Social media is free because you pay for it with your time.”

via Dino Ambrosi (used with permission)

Dino Ambrosi speaks at a school assembly.

In a 2023 TEDx Talk at Laguna Blanca School, Dino Ambrosi made a startling revelation that perfectly underlines the big question of the smartphone era: What is my time worth? Ambrosi is the founder of Project Reboot and an expert at guiding teens and young adults to develop more empowering relationships with technology.

Assuming the average person now lives to 90, after calculating the average time they spend sleeping, going to school, working, cooking, eating, doing chores, sleeping, and taking care of personal hygiene, today’s 18-year-olds have only 334 months of their adult lives to themselves.

"How you spend this time will determine the quality of your life,” Ambrosi says. However, given the tech habits of today’s young people, most of those months will be spent staring at screens, leaving them with just 32 months to leave their mark on the world. "Today, the average 18-year-old in the United States is on pace to spend 93% of their remaining free time looking at a screen,” Ambrosi says.


dino ambrosi, teens and technology, smartphone addictionAn 18-year-olds remaining time, in months. via TEDx

The idea that an entire generation will spend most of their free time in front of screens is chilling. However, the message has a silver lining. Sharing this information with young people can immediately impact how they spend their time.

How to get teens to reduce their screentime

Ambrosi says his work with Project Reboot through on-campus initiatives, school assemblies, and parent workshops has taught him that teens are more concerned about time wasted on their phones than the damage it may do to their mental health. Knowing the topic that resonates can open the door for an effective dialogue about a topic that’s hard for many young people to discuss. When teens realize they are giving their entire lives away for free, they are more apt to reconsider their relationship with smartphones.

“I actually don't get through to a lot of teens, as well as when I help them realize the value of their time and then highlight the fact that that time is being stolen from them,” Ambrosi told Upworthy.

A Common Sense Media study shows that the average 13 to 18-year-old, as of 2021, spent an average of 8 hours and 39 minutes a day on entertainment screentime.

“It’s important to get them to view time as their most valuable resource that they can use to invest in themselves or enjoy life and tick the boxes on their bucket list. I really want them to see that that's something they should take control of and prioritize because we're all under the impression that social media is free, but it's actually not free. We just pay for it with our time.”

dino ambrosi, project reboot, teens smartphonesDino AMbrosi speaks at Berkeley.via Dino Ambrosi (used with permission)

Ambrosi believes that young people are less likely to hand their time to tech companies for free when they understand its value. “I find that kids really respond to that message because nobody wants to feel manipulated, right? And giving them that sense of being wronged, which I think they have been, by tech companies that are off operating on business models that are not aligned with their well-being, is important.”

He also believes parents should be sympathetic and nonjudgmental when talking to young people about screentime because it’s a struggle that just about everyone faces and feels shame about. A little understanding will prevent them from shutting down the conversation altogether.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

How to reduce my screentime

Ambrosi has some suggestions to help people reduce their screentime.

The ClearSpace app

ClearSpace forces you to take a breathing delay before using a distracting app. It also asks you to set a time limit and allows you to set a number of visits to the site per day. If you eclipse the number of visits, it sends a text to a friend saying you exceeded your budget. This can help people be accountable for one another’s screentime goals.

Don’t sleep with your phone

Ambrosi says to charge your phone far away from your bedside stand when you sleep and use an alarm clock to wake up. If you do have an alarm clock on your phone, set up an automation so that as soon as you turn off the alarm, it opens up an app like Flora or Forest and starts an hour-long timer that incentivizes you to be off your phone for the first hour of the day.

“In my experience, if you can stay off screens for the last hour and the first hour of the day, the other 22 hours get a lot easier because you get the quality rest and sleep that you need to wake up fully charged, and now you're more capable of being intentional because you are at your best," Ambrosi told Upworty.

Keep apps in one place

Ambrosi says to keep all of your social apps and logins on one device. “I try to designate a specific use for each device as much as possible,” he told Upworthy. “I try to keep all my social media time and all my entertainment on my phone as opposed to my computer because I want my computer to be a tool for work.”

Even though there are significant challenges ahead for young people as they try to navigate a screen-based world while keeping them at a healthy distance, Ambrosi is optimistic about the future.

“I'm really optimistic because I have seen in the last year, in particular, that the receptiveness of student audiences has increased by almost an order of magnitude. Kids are waking up to the fact that this is the problem. They want to have this conversation,” he told Upworthy. “Some clubs are starting to address this problem at several schools right now; from the talks I've given this semester alone, kids want to be involved in this conversation. They're creating phone-free spaces on college and high school campuses by their own accord. I just think we have a huge potential to leverage this moment to move things in the right direction.”

For more information on Ambrosi’s programs, visit ProjectReboot.School.

This article originally appeared last year.

From Your Site Articles
smartphones
Trending Stories