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A request from your chronically ill friend: what I need when we talk about my sickness.

When I meet new people, I often struggle to explain what I need. This is it.

When I was 14, I woke up with a fat face.

I was sick with a fever higher than I had ever felt. My face felt like a sumo wrestler had crammed a cantaloupe into my ear.

My mom took me to the emergency room in the closest town to our family’s remote lake house in North Carolina. Receptionists shooed me in, nurses injected butt shots, and doctors gave me doe-eyed stares. They had no idea what was wrong with me.


Photo via iStock.

This routine of waking up suddenly sick, with a fat face and a spiked fever, continued for years.

Finally, when I was 16, doctors handed me a diagnosis and a pill regimen and told me I might be sick forever.

I was young enough that my pediatric doctor called to give my mom the diagnosis over the phone. The most dramatic part happened before the diagnosis, though, when they told my mom that they had somehow lost my eight vials of blood (which had taken hours of sweat and tears and people holding me down to get). Otherwise, the phone call was short and I could hear the words through the phone my mom held up to her ear.

“I’m so sorry,” the pediatric doctor said to my mom. As if we knew anything about an autoimmune disorder called Sjögren’s syndrome, with hallmark symptoms of dry eyes and a dry mouth, and why we should possibly join the doctor in feeling sad.

Now, more than 10 years later, I’m living fairly well with this autoimmune disorder.

But still, when I meet new people, I struggle with how to explain what I need. Part of my introduction to new people has to include these words: “I’m sick.” And that’s not easy.

So hello, new friend. Here’s what I need you to try to understand when we talk about my life with a chronic illness:

1. I need you to let me have my green couch moments.

After that first day at the hospital in North Carolina, they sent me home without answers and I slept on the green couch at my family’s lake house for days. I remember feeling sad, watching my cousins jump off the diving board at the end of the dock.

Photo via iStock.

But I mostly remember feeling sad about how my family looked at me. They all had the saddest eyes, like they knew something about my future that I couldn’t comprehend at the age of 14.

For some reason, I’ve continued to have a lot of different green couches over the years in various houses and apartments. Sometimes when my sickness takes over, I have to spend days — or weeks — recovering on my green couch. I need you to let me stay there to rest and wait for Netflix to ask me, “Are you still watching 'Friends'?”

2. I need you to show up.

No one knows what tomorrow holds. But if my tomorrow puts me in the hospital, I need you to come. I need you to show up. Sure, you can bring me flowers, but I really just need you to be there at my bedside, hanging out.

In high school, when my hospital visits lasted for 12 or 14 days of sucking on lemons in the pediatric wing to trigger my salivary glands and going for walks wheeling my IV bag, I remember the friends who showed up. And I remember the friends who only came after my parents bribed them to sit with me for a couple hours so they could go home to shower.

People were afraid. I get it. I was afraid, too.

3. I need you to stop asking why doctors can’t fix me.

The autoimmune disorder that I have is chronic, meaning there isn’t a cure, just like many other people in the world with chronic illnesses. I know it’s confusing — you come down with a cough and you go to the doctor to get better.

For me, it’s not that simple. I take a couple of medications that help tackle my individual symptoms and improve my quality of life with pain management, but that’s it. That’s all doctors can do at this point.

Please stop asking why. Doctors don’t know. I don’t know.

4. I need you to try to see my invisible pain.

All those years when I woke up with a fat face were just my invisible illness trying to make a guest appearance for one episode. Mostly, my body suffers in ways that you can’t see.

Photo via iStock.

The more visible symptoms happen in cold weather when the blood rushes away from my hands and feet. This is when you watch in amazement because my white hands look like a dead person’s. I need you to know that the invisible pain hurts just as bad as the visible pain.

5. I need you to stop asking me how I feel today.

Some days, it’s a big deal to just get out of bed because my joints ache and after even 10 hours of sleep, I still feel like I have a hangover. My right foot and my back feel broken, and my dry eyes build a white film on my contacts that feels like I’m watching the world through a dirty fish bowl.

When you ask me how I feel today, the answer is complicated. The list of pain that’s both inflamed or subsided is longer than we need to hash out. And sometimes the answer to your questions makes me sad, grieving the loss of a dream of a pain-free life I think I deserve.

6. I need you to let me weep in my mom’s arms, even as a grown adult.

Next month, I turn 27. Recently, I wept in my mom’s arms in a shaking way that startled even me. It was the day I got another doctor’s bill for hundreds that I couldn’t afford, and I wasn’t sure if I could even go to my specialist appointment because it might mean I couldn’t pay rent or buy groceries for a couple of months.

My health insurance doesn’t get it. They cover so little, deeming appointments and blood work as “medically unnecessary.” But truthfully, nothing about this sick life is easy to handle, even as a pretty independent adult. I need you to let me weep from the deepest places and not tell me to just shake it off.

7. I need you to stop telling me I can’t.

I told my parents I wanted to go on a mission trip to Africa. Instantly, they said, “You can’t.”

I’ve heard these words before, about studying abroad or becoming an elementary school teacher, with planes and buildings and countries with germs lurking behind every corner. Their advice comes from places of love. But I can’t have you joining in on this whole “You can’t” chant.

Until a doctor gives a definite “No, you can’t do that or go there,” then I need you to invite me to go places. I need you to challenge me and dream with me.

8. I need you to let me be stubborn.

I have a cousin who’s searching for a diagnosis for something autoimmune right now. My biggest prayer for her is that she stays stubborn, even after she knows she’s sick. She studied abroad before she got sick, before anyone tried to tell her she can’t.

The last couple of years, I moved to a new time zone, even when some told me I couldn’t. You might get to know me now and want to protect me in a plastic bubble everywhere we go. Please don’t. If you’re planning a trip somewhere exotic, invite me. I’ll tell you if it’s too much.

Photo via iStock.

Let me wrestle in the dark with my own stubbornness, just like when I was a little girl and insisted on riding my new bike with shiny tassels on the very first night, even though it was too big and pitch dark outside. I might fall down and get hurt, but I promise you I’ll learn from stubbornly ditching the training wheels in the dark.

9. I need you to tell me to stop staring at that hospital waiting in the sky.

I live in Dallas with a clear view to Baylor hospital in the skyline. Sometimes, while I’ve sat by the pool at my apartment, I’ve caught myself staring for too long at the hospital waiting in the sky for my future arrival.

You might be familiar with how we tell the “sick narrative”: sick, sicker, dying, gone. I have a higher risk of lymphoma and other complications, but this doesn’t mean that’s definitely how my story will end.

So if you catch me anxiously staring at my scripted future, stop me. I need you to remind me that the story can twist in so many directions, especially with technology and modern medicine that completely shatter traditional death sentences.

10. I need you to let me change the world today. Now.

The best (and worst) part about being sick: It moves me into action. I don’t have time to wait. I probably quit jobs sooner than you would or chase after dreams in frantic ways while you put yours on the back burner. I also don’t have time to waste.

It’s scary and exciting all wrapped into one. I need you to help me figure out how little me plays a part in this big story. Let me fight for things that matter today because tomorrow is just a gift.

11. I need you to love me like the 80-year-old grandma I am.

I’ve finally found a pill box that fits all the vitamins and medications that I need to sort out for designated times each day. My dream night is one cozied up and warm on the couch, followed by a 9:30 bedtime. Sjögren’s means I don’t produce enough tears, but if I did, I would cry while laughing at how many times I have to go to the bathroom because of all the water I have to drink to stay hydrated.

Yes, me and your 80-year-old grandma probably have more in common than you and I do. I’ve completely accepted this fact. Especially since I’ve been 80 since I was 16.

So love me like a grandma! Stop inviting me out to all-nighters and saying it’s so funny how I go to bed early and love warm socks. It’s not funny or cute. It’s who I am.

My autoimmune disorder is in no way categorized as “the worst.”

Believe me, people suffer every day with far worse, much more incurable diseases than mine. Some days, my illness feels mostly annoying, like an accessory I carry around and must remember to bring with me when I leave the house.

But I hope you will one day meet one of my best friends, a woman who has learned to love me and my sickness. She remembers little details, like how I lack the saliva required to eat dry pretzels filled with dry peanut butter. She figures out how to eat each pretzel with a huge swig of water so I won’t choke, and she does it with me, too. Together, we laugh.

She sits with me on the green couch for Netflix marathons when I’m sick. And together, we cry.

That’s what I want, what I need, and what I want you to know about me, friend: W​e all have our stuff, and this is mine.

Planet

Our favorite giveaway is back. Enter to win a free, fun date! 🌊 💗

It's super easy, no purchase or donation necessary, and you help our oceans! That's what we call a win-win-win. Enter here.

Our favorite giveaway is back. Enter to win a free, fun date! 🌊 💗
True

Our love for the ocean runs deep. Does yours? Enter here!

This Valentine’s Day, we're bringing back our favorite giveaway with Ocean Wise. You have the chance to win the ultimate ocean-friendly date. Our recommendation? Celebrate love for all your people this Valentine's Day! Treat your mom friends to a relaxing spa trip, take your best friend to an incredible concert, or enjoy a beach adventure with your sibling! Whether you're savoring a romantic seafood dinner or enjoying a movie night in, your next date could be on us!

Here’s how to enter:


  • Go to upworthy.com/oceandate and complete the quick form for a chance to win - it’s as easy as that.
  • P.S. If you follow @oceanwise or donate after entering, you’ll get extra entries!

Here are the incredible dates:

1. Give mom some relaxation

She’s up before the sun and still going at bedtime. She’s the calendar keeper, the lunch packer, the one who remembers everything so no one else has to. Moms are always creating magic for us. This Valentine’s Day, we’re all in for her. Win an eco-friendly spa day near you, plus a stash of All In snack bars—because she deserves a treat that’s as real as she is. Good for her, kinder to the ocean. That’s the kind of love we can all get behind.


Special thanks to our friends at All In who are all in on helping moms!

2. Jump in the ocean, together

Grab your favorite person and get some much-needed ocean time. Did you know research on “blue spaces” suggests that being near water is linked with better mental health and well-being, including feeling calmer and less stressed? We’ll treat you to a beach adventure like a surfing or sailing class, plus ocean-friendly bags from GOT Bag and blankets from Sand Cloud so your day by the water feels good for you and a little gentler on the ocean too.

Special thanks to our friends at GOT Bag. They make saving the ocean look stylish and fun!

3. Couch potato time

Love nights in as much as you love a date night out? We’ve got you. Have friends over for a movie night or make it a cozy night in with your favorite person. You’ll get a Disney+ and Hulu subscription so you can watch Nat Geo ocean content, plus a curated list of ocean-friendly documentaries and a movie-night basket of snacks. Easy, comfy, and you’ll probably come out of it loving the ocean even more.

4. Dance all day!

Soak up the sun and catch a full weekend of live music at BeachLife Festival in Redondo Beach, May 1–3, 2026, featuring Duran Duran, The Offspring, James Taylor and His All-Star Band, The Chainsmokers, My Morning Jacket, Slightly Stoopid, and Sheryl Crow. The perfect date to bring your favorite person on!

We also love that BeachLife puts real energy into protecting the coastline it’s built on by spotlighting ocean and beach-focused nonprofit partners and hosting community events like beach cleanups.

Date includes two (2) three-day GA tickets. Does not include accommodation, travel, or flights.

5. Chef it up (at home)

Stay in and cook something delicious with someone you love. We’ll hook you up with sustainable seafood ingredients and some additional goodies for a dinner for two, so you can eat well and feel good knowing your meal supports healthier oceans and more responsible fishing.

Giveaway ends 2/15/26 at 11:59pm PT. Winners will be selected at random and contacted via email from the Upworthy. No purchase necessary. Open to residents of the U.S. and specific Canadian provinces that have reached age of majority in their state/province/territory of residence at the time. Please see terms and conditions for specific instructions. Giveaway not affiliated with Instagram. More details at upworthy.com/oceandate

guitar, learning a skill, neuroscience, music, exposure, passive exposure, gardening

A woman learning how to play guitar.

Learning a new skill, such as playing an instrument, gardening, or picking up a new language, takes a lot of time and practice, whether that means scale training, learning about native plants, or using flashcards to memorize new words. To improve through practice, you have to perform the task repeatedly and receive feedback so you know whether you’re doing it correctly. Is my pitch correct? Did my geraniums bloom? Is my pronunciation understandable?

However, a new study by researchers at the Institute of Neuroscience at the University of Oregon shows that you can speed up these processes by adding a third element to practice and feedback: passive exposure. The good news is that passive exposure requires minimal effort and is enjoyable.


"Active learning of a... task requires both expending effort to perform the task and having access to feedback about task performance," the study authors explained. "Passive exposure to sensory stimuli, on the other hand, is relatively effortless and does not require feedback about performance."


woman reading, woman book, young woman, studying, new skills A woman reading a book.via Canva/Photos

How to pick up new skills faster?

So, if you’re learning to play the blues on guitar, listen to plenty of Howlin’ Wolf or Robert Johnson throughout the day. If you’re learning to cook, keep the Food Network on TV in the background to absorb some great culinary advice. Learning to garden? Take the time to notice the flora and fauna in your neighborhood or make frequent trips to your local botanical garden.

If you’re learning a new language, watch plenty of TV and films in the language you are learning. The scientists add that auditory learning is especially helpful, so listen to plenty of audiobooks or podcasts on the subject you’re learning about.

But, of course, you also have to be actively learning the skill as well by practicing your guitar for the recommended hours each day or by taking a class in languages. Passive exposure won't do the work for you, but it's a fantastic way to pick up things more quickly. Further, passive exposure keeps the new skill you're learning top-of-mind, so you're probably more likely to actively practice it.

What is passive exposure?

Researchers discovered the tremendous benefits of passive exposure after studying a group of mice. They trained them to find water by using various sounds to give positive or negative feedback, like playing a game of “hot or cold.” Some mice were passively exposed to these sounds when they weren't looking for water. Those who received this additional passive exposure and those who received active training learned to find the water reward more quickly.

gardening, woman gardening, gardening shears, leaning gardening, weeds A woman tending to her garden.via Canva/Photos


“Our results suggest that, in mice and in humans, a given performance threshold can be achieved with relatively less effort by combining low-effort passive exposure with active training,” James Murray, a neuroscientist who led the study, told University of Oregon News. “This insight could be helpful for humans learning an instrument or a second language, though more work will be needed to better understand how this applies to more complex tasks and how to optimize training schedules that combine passive exposure with active training.”

The one drawback to this study was that it was conducted on mice, not humans. However, recent studies on humans have found similar results, such as in sports. If you visualize yourself excelling at the sport or mentally rehearse a practice routine, it can positively affect your actual performance. Showing, once again, that when it comes to picking up a new skill, exposure is key.

The great news about the story is that, in addition to giving people a new way to approach learning, it’s an excuse for us to enjoy the things we love even more. If you enjoy listening to blues music so much that you decided to learn for yourself, it’s another reason to make it an even more significant part of your life.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

This article originally appeared last year.

job interview tips, career coach, career goals, job interviews, economy

Ace the interview, whether you love your current job or not.

"Why do you want to leave your current job?"

This common interview question can trip up even the most qualified candidates. Should you share specifics, and if so, which ones? Would being vague raise suspicion? Could some details come off as too negative? One career coach offers a smart approach that keeps the focus on the one thing everyone is invested in: filling the vacant role.


"You should frame it as a pull instead of a push," career coach Madeline Mann said in a TikTok video.

Rather than answering the question with common replies such as wanting a different opportunity or having no room for advancement in your current role, which "push" you away from your current employer, shift the focus of your answer to the "pull" of the open position. That includes the job description, the appeal of the company, and the factors that drew you to apply or prompted a recruiter to reach out.

Instead of saying, "I'm looking for a different job," try something like: "I wasn't actively looking for a new role, but after learning about this position, I wanted to know more and share what I could bring to the team."

@selfmademillennial

Nearly every company will ask you why you left your job or why you are leaving your current job, it will sound like: “why did you leave your job?” “Why do you want to leave your current job?” They asked this in the job interview to get an understanding of your motivations and desires. They will also make assumptions that history will repeat itself, so be careful with your answer and what it says about you! Here is how to answer it with answer examples and samples. Follow for more job interview strategies and tips. #JobInterviewTips #JobSearch #jobinterview

Mann said this approach helps you avoid any generic, and sometimes uncomfortable, responses. She argued that it positions you as a qualified candidate who is excited to join the team, rather than someone who can't wait to leave their current one.

Other experts weigh in

Many of Mann's fellow career experts who spoke with Upworthy agreed with her approach and offered additional advice on how to answer, "Why do you want to leave your current job?"

"Madeline Mann's approach in the clip–developing a 'pull' narrative rather than a 'push' narrative–is absolutely spot on," said Lili Foggle, director of the Professional Association of Résumé Writers & Career Coaches Interview Institute. "An interview is a competition, and in most cases there's just one winner. A candidate who is miserable and desperate to leave their current role, is not going to be the number one candidate that they can't wait to hire."

@emily.the.recruiter

How to answer “why are you looking for a new job” in an interview #careertips #interviewtips #interviews #recruiterhack

"'Why are you leaving your current job?' is a common trap," said career coach Brian Pulliam. "Honestly, it's none of their damn business, but it is an opportunity to share more about yourself to help you stand out."

"Responses to questions like these reveal more than 'why' you're really leaving a company. A good manager or HR professional is seeking to learn more about you by asking this," said Dr. Antoinette M. Boyd, a former HR professional and current assistant professor at Maryville University. "For this reason, the best answers combine honesty with information that helps the interviewer understand your current aspirations and future ambitions, so they have an understanding of why this opportunity and company are in alignment with your professional goals."

While the majority of Mann's peers agreed that focusing on the positive aspects of your current role and what you can offer a potential employer is a smart approach, not all of them felt it was the best way to highlight your strengths.

"I respectfully disagree with [Mann's advice] and here's why," remarked career coach Renessa Boley Layne. "There are two things employers are looking for with this question: performance risk and fit risk. Candidates who proactively address both in their answer are the ones who win. This advice, however, runs the risk of marking a candidate as a 'job hopper,' and that's a huge fit risk for managers."


@realisticrecruiting

When you get asked on a job interview, why you want to leave your current job? It is OK to be a passive candidate. It is OK to have options. The best candidates usually do. #jobsearching #jobsearchtips #careeradvice #jobinterviewquestions #jobinterviewtips

Formulaic interview questions or not, it's important to know that the interview process is just as much about you evaluating them as a potential employer as it is about appealing to them as a future employee.

"The biggest miss with interviews is treating it like a test," added Pulliam. "It's far more effective to think of it like 'Career Tinder': you need to know enough to decide if you want to swipe right on them, not just convince them to swipe right on you."

Pets

Vet demonstrates 'squish the cat' method of safe cat handling in delightfully helpful video

There's a reason Dr. Burstyn's "How to pick up a cat" video has been viewed 23 million times.

cats, pets, cat handling, veterinarian, feline behavior

Handling a cat may seem like a delicate matter, but being delicate isn't actually the way to go.

If you've ever tried to make a cat do something it doesn't want to do, you've likely experienced the terror that a cat's wrath can invoke. Our cute, cuddly feline friends may be small, but the razor blades on their feet are no joke when they decide to utilize them. Even cats who love us can get spicy if we try to manhandle them, so we can imagine how things will go with cats who don't know us well. But sometimes it's necessary to handle a cat even if it's resistant to the idea.

This is where Vancouver veterinarian Dr. Uri Burstyn comes in. His "How to pick up a cat like a pro" video, in which he demonstrates a few ways of picking up and handling a cat, has been viewed over 23 million times since he shared it in 2019. Unlike many viral videos, it's not humorous and nothing outrageous happens, but the combo of Burstyn's calm demeanor and his repeated instructions to "squish that cat" has endeared him to the masses.


- YouTube www.youtube.com

The video truly is helpful; he shows the ways to pick up a cat that make them feel the most secure using his cats, one-year-old Claudia and 14-year-old Mr. Pirate. He explains that cats spook very easily and it's best to introduce yourself to them gently. Let them sniff your fingers, keeping your fingers curled in, and once they've sniffed you, you can often give them a light rub on the cheek or under the chin.

Picking them up is a different story. The reason many cats will claw or scratch you when you try to pick them up is because they feel unsupported or unsafe, so they'll scramble around trying to get some footing. Burstyn shows how he picks up Claudia with one hand under the chest and one hand under her abdomen. If he needs to carry her around, he squishes her into his body so she feels "nice and supported." He may even put a hand under her front paws.

cats, pets, cat handling, veterinarian, feline behavior Cats can be finicky about how they're held. Photo credit: Canva

Then came the best part of the video: "Squish That Cat"

"Now if we do have a cat who's trying to get away from us?" Burstyn said. "We always squish that cat. If you're trying to hold the cat down, whether it's to trim their nails or to give them a pill, or whether you just want to have a cat not run off for a moment, squish that cat. All you need to know about cat restraint is to squish that cat."

Burstyn explains that cats generally feel very secure being squished, even if they're really scared.

"Sometimes cats come to me in the clinic, and they're quite afraid," he said. "And you just gently squish them, and they'll sit there and kind of not hurt themselves, not hurt us. Just hang out and let us do our thing."

He demonstrated putting a towel over the cat, explaining, "If you have a towel handy, this is one of the best cat restraint tools around. You can just throw a towel on the catty and squish her with the towel, that way they won't get a claw into you if they are scrambling about a bit. Very safe and gentle, and generally cats are very, very happy to be squished like that."

cats, pets, cat handling, veterinarian, feline behavior Squish that cat. Photo credit: Canva

Dr. Burstyn also showed how to do a "football hold," tucking the cat under your arm with them facing backwards. "So this is kind of an emergency way if you really need to carry a cat somewhere in a hurry," he said. Scooping up Claudia, he explained, "Little head's under your arm, butt in your hand, and you squish her tight to your body. And with that little football carry, you can basically hold a cat very securely and very safely, because it's really hard for them to rake you with their hind legs."

If you're worried about over-squishing your cat, Dr. Burnstyn says don't. "You don't have to worry about hurting a cat," he said. "They're very, very tough little beasts. You know, just squishing them against your body's never going to do them any harm. In fact, they tend to feel more safe and secure when they're being held tightly."

Dr. Burnstyn also demonstrated how to pick up and set down a "shoulder cat" who insists on climbing onto people's shoulders and hanging out there, as Mr. Pirate does. It's highly entertaining, as Mr. Pirate is a big ol' chonky kitty.


@yozron

she loves my shoulders i guess #catcore #kittendad #kittensoftiktok #cat #fyp

People in the comments loved Dr. Burnstyn's demonstration, with several dubbing him the Bob Ross of veterinary medicine. Even people who don't have cats said they watched the whole video, and many loved Claudia and Mr. Pirate as well.

"This is just proof that cats are liquid."

"12/10 cat. Excellent squishability."

"So essentially, cats love hugs? That's the most wonderful thing i've heard all day."

"This cat is so well mannered and looks educated."

"Mr Pirate is an absolute unit."

"S q u i s h . T h a t . C a t ."

"I need 'Squish that cat' shirt.

"Dang, that actually helped with my female cat. She has been through at least two owners before me and had some bad expriences which obviously resulted in trust issues. She has now been with me for two years and it had gotten loads better, but she still did not want me to hold her. Normally I simply would have let her be, but for vet visits and such it was not an ideal situation. But then I saw this video and tried to squish the cat. And she loves it! She is turning into quite the snuggly bug. Thank you!"

So there you go. When all else fails, squish that cat and see what happens.

You can follow Dr. Burstyn on YouTube at Helpful Vancouver Vet.


Pets

Ancient Romans loved their dogs. Here's what their heartbreakingly beautiful epitaphs said about them.

"My eyes were wet with tears our little dog, when I bore you to the grave."

ancient romans, romans, dogs, roman dogs, dog epitaphs, dog graves, epitaph

An ancient mosaic of a dog.

Ancient Romans—they're just like us. At least when it comes to how much they love their dogs, that is.

Pliny the Elder (23–79 A.D.), the Roman author and scholar, described dogs as "man's most faithful companion" in his Naturalis Historia. He also wrote: "The dog alone knows his master, and he alone recognizes his own name. He alone, too, in his master’s defense, will lay down his life; and, let his master die, he will remain on the watch by the body."


The Romans' devotion to their dogs was made clear in the epitaphs they wrote for their dogs as inscriptions on their tombstones. David Ian Rowe, an American anthropologist and archeologist who specializes in ethnocynology, "the study of dogs in human cultural contexts," shared a number of heartbreakingly beautiful epitaphs the Ancient Romans wrote in honor of their beloved dogs. (They'll surely bring a tear to your eye.)

Howe explains in the video's intro that these epitaphs were originally written in Latin. Here are ancient Roman epitaphs that expressed how much they loved their dogs.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Epitaph #1

"Myia never barked without reason. But now she is silent."

Epitaph #2

"Surely even as thou liest in dead in this tomb, I deem the wild beasts yet fear thy white bones."

Epitaph #3

"My eyes were wet with tears our little dog, when I bore you to the grave. So Patricus, never again shall you give me a thousand kisses. Never can you be contentedly in my lap. In sadness have I buried you, and you deservest. In a resting place of marble, I have put you for all of time by the side of my shade."

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Epitaph #4

"Here the stone says it holds the white dog from Melita, the most faithful guardian of Eumelus. Bull, they called him when he was yet alive. But now his voice is imprisoned in the silent pathways of the night."

Epitaph #5

"Ye who pass this monument laugh not, I pray thee, for this is a dog's grave. Tears fell for me and dust was heaped above me by a master's hand."

Epitaph #6

"I am in tears while carrying you to your last resting place. Much as I rejoiced when brining you home in my own hands fifteen years ago."

@davidianhowe

Greco-Roman dog epitaphs. #AncientRome #Rome #AncientHistory #ClassicalCivilization #Dogs #epitaph #Anthropology #Archaeology #History

From other sources

The last epitaphs come from The British Museum and the University of Arizona, respectively:

Epitaph #7

"Gaul gave me my birth and the pearl-oyster from the seas full of treasure my name, an honour fitting to my beauty. I was trained to run boldly through strange forests and to hunt out furry wild beasts in the hills never accustomed to be held by heavy chains nor endure cruel beatings on my snow-white body. I used to lie on the soft lap of my master and mistress and knew to go to bed when tired on my spread mattress and I did not speak more than allowed as a dog, given a silent mouth No-one was scared by my barking but now I have been overcome by death from an ill-fated birth and earth has covered me beneath this small piece of marble. Margarita (‘Pearl’)." - The British Museum

Epitaph #8

"How sweet that one was, how kind, who, while she was living, used to lie down in the folds of my toga always aware of sleep and a bed. O what a wicked deed, Myia, that you have perished. Just now you would bark, if any rival were lying down near your lady, wanton one. O what a wicked deed, Myia, that you have perished. Now the lofty tomb holds you unaware of life, you are neither able to rage nor leap, nor will you shine back to me with flattering bites." - University of Arizona

The Open Book, Scotland, bookstore, books, traveling, Wigtown Book Festival
Photo Credit: Colin Tennant, Flickr, Canva

The Open Book in Wigtown, Scotland

Burrowed in the green Dumfries and Galloway county of Scotland, is a cozy bookstore. But this isn't just any bookstore. Sure, it has plastic-covered hardback books lining old wooden shelves. Yes, it has the occasional stool for sitting and reading a chapter or two. But what makes this particular bookstore stand out is one can actually rent and live in it, and help sell books.

It's called "The Open Book," and it's a bookshop with a warm, cheery flat upstairs. A person can rent it out for a snippet of time using Airbnb, and work at the store downstairs in whatever capacity they choose. Chris Lawlor (self-described Scotland promoter) shared a clip on his Instagram breaking down the whole genius operation.


Over various photos of the unique spot, a voiceover of Lawler asks, "Did you know that in Scotland, there's a bookshop you can actually live in and run yourself for a week? It's part of a unique experience where you're handed the keys before heading up the stairs to relax and sleep. Then waking up and opening the doors to live out a dream job of running a cozy bookshop called The Open Book in Wigtown."

The street is riddled with other bookstores Lawler shares: "With eight bookshops on your doorstep...the money collected during your stay goes toward the town's annual book festival."

While versions of this Reel have been posted by others, Lawlor's clip has well over half a million likes and thousands of comments from enthusiastic travelers. Some are just in disbelief. "What? I just watched this 3 times to make sure I wasn't dreaming. I can live in and run a bookshop? Dreams do come true! Holy smokes. I'm shook. This is the coziest, dreamiest, most brilliant idea ever!" wrote one.

The Open Book, Scotland, bookstore, books, traveling, Wigtown Book Festival A person browses at The Open Book in Scotland.Photo Credit: Colin Tennant, Flickr

A few note the ingenious business model, with one writing, "Cracking business idea. Free staff!"

And though some point out that the waitlist is rather long, they're adding it to their "to do" lists. One writes, "As a retired librarian, this would be a dream vacation--wait, I visit Scotland every year for the last 11 years. Why haven't I done this already? Lol OK, new item on my bucket list."

Having begun in the 1990s, the Wigtown Book Festival is quite the event. On a page of their website they explain, "Booked through Airbnb, paying guests live in the self-catering apartment upstairs and run the bookshop below it for the duration of their stay. During their stay, guests are free to change displays, price books, re-categorise them, and make inventive use of the blackboard that entices visitors in to browse or chat. Some guests are happy to quietly run the bookshop, while others come with firmer plans and creative ideas!"

The Open Book, Scotland, bookstore, books, traveling, Wigtown Book Festival The bedroom for rent above The Open Book in Scotland.Photo Credit: Colin Tennant, Flickr

Writer Freya Parr documented her experience at the shop in 2019 for The Guardian. After explaining it was the "brainchild" of Jessica Fox, she shares that she and her boyfriend had a wonderful time. " If we weren’t being entertained by the customers, it was the other booksellers, who welcomed us like old friends. We became as much of a tourist attraction for the locals as the place was for us, and the conversations we had were worlds away from those back home. Nobody cared what our jobs were–they were more interested in what had brought us here."

On the Airbnb site, they add how it works: "The first ever bookshop holiday / residency experience, Scotland's National Book Town welcomes you to play-bookshop for a week or two. We'll give you your very own apartment and bookshop below, supported by a team of friendly volunteers to make your trip as lovely as possible. Set up by The Wigtown Festival Company, The Open Book's aim is to celebrate books, independent bookshops, and welcome people around the world to Scotland's National Book Town."

The reviews from people who have taken part in this unique experience as recently as last month are stellar. One writes, in part, "Running The Open Book bookshop for a week was utmost fun! We met lots of travelling booknerds who popped in and many of the friendly Wigtown locals. It's a charming little town surrounded by beautiful nature. We got home yesterday and I miss being in the bookshop already."