20 things Mike Pence did while you weren't looking — and why it matters.

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He may not always be in the shadows.

With the exception of an infamous trip to see Hamilton last November and a controversy about whether it's OK to dine with women other than his wife, we've heard relatively little about Vice President Mike Pence since the election. In May, CNN even ran a story with the headline, "Mike Pence's Disappearing Act."

He's a heartbeat away from the presidency and seems interested in following his own political ambitions beyond this administration, so what exactly has Mike Pence been up to lately? A lot, actually.

Here's 20 things Mike Pence has done since taking office:

1. In January, Pence and others lobbied Trump to take hard-line positions on abortion, making good on some of his anti-choice campaign pledges.

Just days after taking office, Trump signed a slew of executive orders. Among them was the reinstatement of the so-called "Mexico City policy," restricting foreign aid from going to groups that offer abortion services.

The Independent wrote about the decision to reinstate the policy, saying that pro-choice activists "feared [Trump] would reintroduce the policy as a gift to Vice President Mike Pence, known for his staunch opposition to abortion rights."

2. Pence has led the charge to advance Trump's policy agenda.

You may have seen him popping up on the Sunday morning political talk shows to push Trump's agenda items. This has especially been the case when it's an issue where Trump himself may not appear to have a total grasp of the policy being discussed, such as health care.

3. He's been very vocal about supporting the use of tax dollars to fund religious schools.

Under the guise of "school choice," Pence has been a long-time supporter of using tax dollars to fund charter schools and religious schools. As governor, Pence expanded Indiana's charter school program and opted out of the nationwide "Common Core" standards. One of the side effects of Pence's reign in Indiana was an uptick in the number of publicly funded schools teaching creationism. Pence, himself, hasn't given a clear answer on whether he believes in evolution.

Trump was short on specifics about education policy during the campaign. In office, he's rallying behind Pence's ideas.

4. In January, Pence met with anti-abortion activists at the White House and delivered a speech at the annual March for Life.

During his address at the anti-choice march, Pence riled up the crowd with a pledge to "work with Congress to end taxpayer funding for abortion and abortion providers," along with promises to support Supreme Court nominees who would overturn Roe v. Wade.

5. Pence spent much of February selling the nomination of Neil Gorsuch to the Supreme Court as "mainstream."

Trump nominated Neil Gorsuch to fill the vacant Supreme Court seat on Jan. 31. Gorsuch, who had a record as a far-right, anti-abortion, anti-LGBTQ judge, would face an uphill climb. That's where Pence came in.

Rather than nominate someone who could receive the 60 votes needed to overcome a filibuster, Trump picked Gorsuch, and Pence immediately began work urging Republican leaders in the Senate to blow up the filibuster. They eventually did, and Gorsuch was sworn in on April 10.

6. Pence cast the tie-breaking vote to confirm Betsy DeVos as secretary of education, the first time a vice president has done so on a cabinet pick.

In February, DeVos was under immense scrutiny from Democrats and moderate Republicans. The billionaire heiress had zero education-related qualifications to run the department, but she did have a history of donating to far-right causes and championing the use of public money to fund schools that would "advance God's kingdom," in line with Pence's own views on education.

With Republicans Lisa Murkowski (Alaska) and Susan Collins (Maine) voting against DeVos' confirmation, the 50-50 vote went to Pence to break the tie. He voted to confirm her.

7. In May, Pence was named the head of Trump's Presidential Advisory Commission on Election Integrity.

This commission was established based on Trump's unproven and unfounded claim that there was widespread voter fraud during the 2016 election. Pence was named commission chair, with Kansas Secretary of State Kris Kobach as vice chair. Together, Pence and Kobach have begun making requests for extensive voter information from states, with many voting rights groups worried that the commission will lead to widespread voter suppression.

8. Pence invited anti-abortion activists to the White House to discuss how to merge their agenda with that of the administration.

On March 9, Pence met with anti-abortion activists to discuss what sort of provisions they would like to see in the American Health Care Act bill, later pitching it to conservative members of the House of Representatives.

9. Later that month, he would cast the tie-breaking vote to nullify an Obama-era rule allowing that Title X funds be used for family planning services.

In his eight years in office, Joe Biden never cast a tie-breaking vote in the Senate. Pence, just months into the job, has broken four ties (confirming DeVos, the motion to proceed on blocking the Title X rule, the final vote on blocking the Title X rule, and the motion to proceed on the Senate's health care bill).

Gutting the Title X rule is bad news, especially for low- and middle-income women across the country.

10. Pence has met with members of the financial industry and championed efforts to roll back Dodd-Frank consumer protections.

Shortly after taking office, Pence addressed the GOP retreat, promising to dismantle the legislation enacted in the aftermath of financial collapse and its "overbearing mandates." In May, he spoke out in favor of Republican Rep. Hensarling's (Texas) CHOICE Act, which would deregulate the financial markets once again.

11. In May, Pence addressed the Susan B. Anthony List "Campaign for Life" gala.

Touting the administration's successes when it came to curtailing reproductive rights, Pence declared, "For the first time in a long time, America has an administration that’s filled top to bottom with people who stand without apology for life."

To cheers, he would later promise to ensure that people receiving health care subsidies would not be able to purchase insurance coverage that includes access to abortion.

12. Pence played a role in urging Trump to sign a "religious liberty" executive order during a National Day of Prayer ceremony.

While the final order was viewed by many conservatives as simply being one step in the right direction and not everything they wanted, the move showed just how much pull the extremely religious vice president has over his boss.

13. Pence addressed the first-ever World Summit in Defense of Persecuted Christians on May 11.

The speech bolstered the administration's narrative that Christians are the true victims of terrorism in the Middle East. The truth is that people of all faiths have been targeted by ISIS, and messages about how Christians are the most persecuted only help advance some of the inherent Islamophobia in actions such as the travel ban — which only helps ISIS.

14. At the University of Notre Dame, Pence delivered a fiery commencement address, targeting "political correctness."

The idea that college campuses are suppressing freedom of speech is a popular talking point, especially among conservatives. Pence used his platform to stoke that fire, saying, "Far too many campuses across America have become characterized by speech codes, safe zones, tone policing, administration-sanctioned political correctness — all of which amounts to nothing less than the suppression of freedom of speech."

15. In May, Pence started his own political action committee called the "Great America Committee."

Marking another first for a sitting vice president, the formation of a PAC signals that maybe he has some larger political ambitions that go beyond the Trump administration and his role as VP. Coupled with outgoing White House press secretary Sean Spicer saying that he'd be on board with a Pence run in 2024, this is worth keeping an eye on.

16. In June, Pence was put in charge of U.S. space policy.

Pence, being someone who likely doesn't really believe in that whole "evolution" thing and once claimed that "smoking doesn't kill," seems like an odd choice to dictate anything related to science. But that's what President Trump did after signing an executive order bringing back the National Space Council.

It's still unclear what sort of direction Pence will take, though he has made promises to put people on Mars.

17. He's raised money for his own PAC and other political causes.

What's the point of having a PAC if you're not going to raise money for it, right? In July, The New York Times reported that Pence has been playing host to "a string of dinners held every few weeks at the vice president’s official residence on the grounds of the Naval Observatory in Washington," courting "big donors and corporate executives."

18. On June 23, Pence addressed Focus on the Family, a powerful anti-LGBTQ organization, for its 40th anniversary.

Speaking about the administration's commitment to helping "persecuted people of faith" and protecting their right to discriminate against LGBTQ people under the guise of "religious liberty," Pence told the crowd, "This president believes that no American, no American should have to violate their conscience to fully participate in American life, and he has taken action to protect the expressions of faith by men and women across this nation."

This is the same organization, mind you, that has called homosexuality "a particularly evil lie of Satan" and has called transgender people "mentally ill" and "like Cinderella in a fantasy world."

19. As special elections have popped up across the country, Pence has been hitting the campaign trail in support of his fellow Republicans.

It's not so surprising that Pence is getting out there. A little curious, however, is how little Trump has done comparatively — and how little coverage Pence's presence has garnered. This once again shows Pence for the shrewd politician he is, able to help prop up other candidates. Trump, on the other hand, is mostly good at promoting one person: Trump.

20. Pence has been pressuring Congress to implement anti-transgender policies in the military.

Days before Trump tweeted that he was banning trans people from serving in the military, Foreign Policy reported that Pence was lobbying hard to fight back against trans inclusion in the military. Pence was reportedly putting pressure on members of Congress to hold the 2018 defense authorization bill hostage unless it included a rider barring funds being used on transition-related health care.

According to Politico, Trump was motivated to outright ban all trans people from the military for fear that the defense bill would stall and he wouldn't receive the funding he requested for his wall. In the end, however, Pence got what he asked for and more. Though the Department of Defense is holding on implementing the tweeted policy until Trump formally submits a plan, it's nearly a done deal.

This matters because Pence might not always be in the background.

It's pretty clear that Pence's political ambitions don't end with being Trump's vice president. With scandals rocking the White House on what seems like a daily basis — including calls for investigations and even some for Trump's impeachment — it's pretty important to take a long hard look at the man next in line for the position.

During the campaign, Pence's extreme positions were largely whitewashed. His extreme anti-LGBTQ and anti-abortion views were rarely talked about. As vice president, Pence has shown himself to be the man he's always been: a smooth-talking politician with far-right social conservative views. So let's keep a watchful eye on what he's doing now because he might just be president one day.

Photo by Chip Somodevilla/Getty Images.

Pop Culture

Mom leaves a 'heartbreaking' gift to flight passengers sitting next to her baby

"That's a mom trying so hard."

@callmebelly/TikTok

An excellent reminder to show kindness and patience.

Listening to a baby cry during a flight might be aggravating, but it’s nothing compared to the moans, groans, and eyerolls that the baby's parents must endure from other passengers when it happens. No matter what tips and tricks are used to try to soothe a little one’s temperament while 30,000 miles in the air, crying is almost inevitable. So, while having to ease their own child’s anxiety, moms and dads also must suffer being the pariah of the trip. What a nightmare.

Recently, one mom was apparently trying so hard to avoid upsetting her fellow flight members that she went above and beyond to essentially apologize ahead of time if her baby began to cry on its first flight. It was a gesture that, while thoughtful, had folks really feeling for how stressed that poor mom must be.

In a clip posted to his TikTok, one of the passengers—Elliot—explained that the mom handed out small care packages to those nearby.

“She’s already so busy and took the time to make these bags for everyone,” Elliot said, before panning the camera to reveal a Ziplock bag full of candy, along with a note that made him “want to cry.”

The note read: “It’s my first flight. I made a deal to be on my best behaviour—but I can’t make any guarantees. I might cry if I get scared or if my ears start to hurt. Here are some treats to make your flight enjoyable. Thank you for being patient with us. Have a great flight.”

Like Elliot, those who watched the video felt some ambivalence at the well intentioned act. Many felt remorse that she would feel the need to appease people in this way.

“This is so sweet but also … kind of breaks my heart that we live in a world in which parents feel the need to do that.”

“Because jerk people have shamed parents into believing that they need to apologize for their kids' absolutely normal behavior. What a gem of a mom.”

“You know that sweet mom worried about this trip so much.”

“That poor mom probably spent nights awake … nervous about that flight, thinking of ways to keep strangers happy.”

"That's a mom trying so hard."

Many rallied behind the mom, arguing that making others feel more comfortable with her child being on board was in no way her responsibility.

“No mom should be apologizing. Adults can control their emotions … babies not …. Hugging this mom from a distance.”

“Dear new parents: no you don’t have to do this. Your babies have the right to exist. We all know babies cry. We know you try your best.”

Luckily, there are just as many stories of fellow passengers being completely compassionate towards parents with small children—from simply choosing to throw on their headphones during a tantrum (instead of throwing one themselves) to going out of their way to comfort a baby (and taking the load of a parent in the process). These little acts of kindness make more of an impact than we probably realize. Perhaps if we incorporated more of this “it takes a village” mindset, flying could be a little bit more pleasant for everyone involved.

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Animals & Wildlife

London Zoo shows off miraculous baby pictures from 6 endangered species

They called the 'baby boom' a huge win in the fight against extinction.

London Zoo

Golden lion tamarin primates

Yes, we’re entering the age of the baby boom. No, not our beloved home-owning generation that remembers listening to music on vinyl records and watching the first episode of “Saturday Night Live” ever aired. No, this time, there’s a new baby boom at the London Zoo. It’s a heartwarming moment for the world’s oldest scientific zoo (which opened in 1828) because six tiny, pint-sized additions were recently born there.

Sign of London Zoo's entrance London Zoo! Photo credit: Canva

If you visit the London Zoo, you’ll see that many animals are part of its conservation breeding programs. This means that they participate in a unique initiative to save their species, hoping to return them to the wild someday. And there’s more good news: London Zoo conservationists have already successfully bred and reintroduced various species back into the wild, such as the Partula Snail, Northern Bald Ibis, Fen Raft Spider, and many others.

So, while very cute, the zoo’s latest additions also play an essential part in each species’ survival and the zoo’s overall conservation efforts. Many of the newly born species are at high risk of extinction because they can no longer survive in their natural habitats due to deforestation, habitat loss, and climate change. Thus, their captive breeding becomes a vital “safety net.” For example, Darwin’s Frogs, one of the many endangered species at the London Zoo, are safe in their Regent’s Park digs from chytrid fungus. This deadly fungal disease is responsible for decimating amphibian populations worldwide.

These births also provide a safe opportunity to study animal behavior, reproduction, and health in controlled environments—insights that can be applied to conservation strategies worldwide.

But what are these elusive endangered species? And are they really that cute? Let’s dive in.

Two twin Golden lion tamarin primates

Say hello to London Zoo’s newest Golden Lion Tamarin twins, Pomelo (male) and Clementine (female). Born last spring, they joined their older brother, Kumquat, with all three primates named after citrus fruits, an ode to their distinct, vibrantly orange fur.) Golden lion tamarins, or Leontopithecus rosalia, are native to Brazil but, unfortunately, face severe survival threats due to habitat loss and the illegal pet trade. In the 1970s, it’s estimated that their wild population dropped to as few as a record-dropping 200, but has since improved.

Rainforest image from London Zoo The rainforest habitat that Clementine and Pomelo reside inPhoto credit: Canva

Both parents love and care for Clementine and Pomelo, who are safe at their home at the London Zoo. As is typical for the species, their father, Fabio, takes care of the little ones most of the time and periodically passes them to their mother for feeding, one at a time.

Fia, the White-faced saki monkey

Alongside the tamarins, a ten-month-old white-faced named Fia has also joined the rainforest habitat.

Fia joins her mother, Kaituma, her father, Milagre, and her older sister, Maya. In 2023, the small family moved to the London Zoo from Whipsnade Zoo in Bedfordshire, England.

Fia, wrapped up in her mother's warmthLondon Zoo

Fia and her family live in the zoo’s “Rainforest Life,” a high-profile exhibit that educates visitors about rainforest ecosystems and the importance of preserving biodiversity. White-faced sakis, or pithecia pithecia, are found in the rainforests of northern South America, including Brazil, Guyana, and Venezuela. They live almost completely in the trees and almost never come down. They are named for the male’s appearance, which is black, except for the head, which is white or reddish. Females, meanwhile, are primarily brown or brown-gray.

Two Asian short-clawed otter pups

Then, there are the two Asian short-clawed otter pups. Born in January, they are too young to be named, and their genders have yet to be determined. Their mother, Midge (who joined London Zoo from Newquay Zoo in 2024), has been dutifully nursing the pups in their nesting area alongside their father, Siyam.

Also known as Aonyx cinereus, Asian short-clawed otters (or Asian small-clawed otters) are the world’s smallest otters, ranging from just 4 to 11 pounds. Its short dark brown hair is relatively short, and the whiskers it sports help detect changes in water current and pressure.

This shallow-water otter lives in freshwater wetlands, mangrove swamps, and fast-flowing, rocky streams throughout southern India, southern China, and parts of Southeast Asia. However, human development and pollution are destroying the wetlands where they live.

Alaotran gentle lemur

Last is London Zoo’s two-month-old Alaotran gentle lemur, who was born to parents Hazo and Rocky. Unnamed so far, the baby lemur has already begun to explore its outdoor environment, nibbling leafy greens alongside its mother and jimping around.

With fewer than 5,000 lemurs remaining, the Alaotran gentle lemur, or Hapalemur alaotrensis, is considered critically endangered. This species is endemic to the papyrus marshes surrounding Madagascar’s largest lake, Lake Alaotra, and is the only primate that lives exclusively in wetland environments. Their marshes face severe threats from habitat destruction due to illegal burning for rice farming and invasive species in Madagascar.

These six births extend far beyond a high-profile attraction for the London Zoo: they are significant steps in safeguarding species on the brink of extinction while teaching the public more about the importance of habitat preservation and biodiversity conservation.

Plus, they’re pretty darn cute, aren’t they?

Excited Anna Kendrick GIFGiphy

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Science

Innovative farm in Virginia can grow 4 million pounds of strawberries on less than one acre

This method uses 97 percent less land and up to 90 percent less water than conventional farming.

Photo credit: Canva

A new way to grow strawberries with less land, less water, and more berries.

Strawberry farm harvests aren't something most of us calculate on a regular basis (or ever at all), but the numbers from a strawberry farm in Richmond, Virginia, are staggering enough to make it worth an old-school word problem. If the average American eats 8 pounds of strawberries a year, and an average strawberry farm yields approximately 20,000 pounds of berries per acre, how many people could a 200-acre strawberry field feed?

I won't make you do the math. The answer is 500,000 people. But what if a crop that size, providing enough strawberries for half a million people, could be grown on just one acre instead of 200? It's possible. You just have to go—or rather grow—up, up, up.

Indoor vertical farm company Plenty Unlimited knows a lot about growing up. In fact, it's their entire business model. Instead of the sprawling fields that traditional farming methods require, vertical farms have a much smaller land footprint, utilizing proprietary towers for growing. Plenty has used vertical farming methods to grow greens such as lettuce, kale, spinach and more for years, but now it boasts a vertical berry farm that can yield a whopping 4 million pounds of strawberries on a little less than an acre.

Growing indoors means not being at the mercy of weather or climate inpredictability (barring a storm taking out your building), which is wise in the era of climate change. Unlike a traditional greenhouse which still uses the sun for light, Plenty's indoor vertical farms make use of the latest technology and research on light, pinpointing the wavelengths plants need from the sun to thrive and recreating them with LED lights. Plenty farms also don't use soil, as what plants really need is water and nutrients, which can be provided without soil (and with a lot less water than soil requires). Being able to carefully control water and nutrients means you can more easily control the size, taste and uniformity of the berries you’re growing.

If that sounds like a lot of control, it is. And that idea might freak people out. But when a highly controlled environment means not having to use pesticides and using up to 90% less water than traditional farming, it starts to sound like a solid, sustainable farming innovation.

Plenty even uses AI in its strawberry farm, according to its website:

“Every element of the Plenty Richmond Farm–including temperature, light and humidity–is precisely controlled through proprietary software to create the perfect environment for the strawberry plants to thrive. The farm uses AI to analyze more than 10 million data points each day across its 12 grow rooms, adapting each grow room’s environment to the evolving needs of the plants – creating the perfect environment for Driscoll’s proprietary plants to thrive and optimizing the strawberries’ flavor, texture and size.”

Plenty even has its own patent-pending method of pollinating the strawberry flowers that doesn’t require bees. Even just the fact that this enormous crop of strawberries will be coming from Virginia is notable, since the vast majority of strawberries in the U.S. are grown in California.

strawberry field Traditional strawberry farming takes up a lot of land.Photo credit: Canva

Plenty's Richmond farm is currently growing strawberries exclusively for Driscoll’s.

“Partnering with Plenty for the launch of the Richmond Farm allows us to bring our premium strawberries closer to consumers in the Northeast, the largest berry consumption region in the U.S.,” Driscoll’s CEO Soren Bjorn said in a press release. “By combining our 100 years of farming expertise and proprietary varieties along with Plenty’s cutting-edge technology, we can deliver the same consistent flavor and quality our customers love — now grown locally. This new innovative farm is a powerful step forward in continuing to drive category growth in new ways for our customers and consumers.”

Is Plenty’s model the farm of the future? Perhaps it’s one option, at least. The more we grapple with the impact of climate change and outdated, unsustainable farming practices, the more innovative ideas we’ll need to feed the masses. If they can get 4 million pounds of strawberries out of an acre of land, what else is possible?

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Education

5 lessons we can take away from the Delta flight that crashed upside down on the runway

1) Always obey seat belt instructions.

Photo credit: YYZBrennan

A Delta flight from Minneapolis flipped over and caught fire upon landing in Toronto.

Flying has often been touted as one of the safest modes of transportation, but after a rash of aviation accidents in February of 2025, people are starting to have questions. What the heck is happening in the friendly skies? Why is there a sudden uptick in plane crashes? Is flying still safe?

One of the weirdest aviation incidents we've seen is the Delta flight that flipped upside down upon landing in Toronto on February 17, knocking off a wing and catching fire as it skidded to a stop on the tarmac. The 76 passengers on the commuter plane found themselves hanging upside down in the cabin as flight attendants raced to get everyone out of the plan quickly and safely. Miraculously, no one was killed, and though 21 injured passengers were initially transported to the hospital, 19 have been released as of February 19.

The thought of having your airplane do a 180-degree roll on the runway and having to exit a burning aircraft from a bat-like position is sheer nightmare fuel, but there are some important lessons we can all learn from how this incident played out.

1. Always obey seat belt instructions—"low and tight across your lap"

If you fly with any regularity at all, chances are you zone out during the pre-takeoff safety instructions, but this accident definitely has us all at least thinking about our seat belt compliance. Imagine how easy it would be to slip out of the seat belt hanging upside down if it weren't buckled low and tight.

There's a reason the seat belt sign exists. If footage of extreme turbulence isn't enough to rattle you into always staying buckled when the light is on, this crash likely will.

2. Respect your flight attendants

Flight attendants sometimes have to deal with difficult or rude passengers, which is unfortunate, especially since those same passengers rely on flight attendants to do their jobs in an emergency to ensure their safety. Flight attendants don't get to freak out when a plane crashes—they have to tap right into their emergency evacuation training.

But in this case, there was no specific training for this specific scenario because who would imagine it ever happening? But those flight attendants were able to improvise and get the passengers on board out of their upside down positions, out the exits and onto the tarmac within seconds of the crash happening. This is a good reminder that even though flying is usually smooth and without incident, flight attendants are primarily there for our safety, not servers there at our beck and call.

3. Regulations in aircraft design help keep us safe

One of the reasons this crash went the way it did is because of the way the plane was designed and made. From the way the wing broke off without tearing apart the fuselage (the body of the plane) to the way the seats remained in tact and firmly planted despite being upside down with people in them, the aviation engineers behind the building of this aircraft—as well as the regulations in place that require more safety features—deserve some kudos.

“Everything that could go wrong went wrong, yet 80 people survived the accident,” said David Soucie, a CNN safety analyst and former FAA safety inspector who credited better plane design, improved safety and stronger, more secure seats for the survival rate.

"Even the design of the seat back or the tray table is all part of how we consider making that survivable space," Graham Braithwaite, professor of safety and accident investigation at the UK's Cranfield University, told the BBC. "And the seatbelt that people have is so important - that is the ultimate thing that stops people being thrown around the cabin like this."

4. People are pretty awesome, actually

Reports from people who were on the flight indicate that the passengers helped one another out and were generally awesome in an incredibly harrowing situation.

One man shared that he and the woman sitting next to him, who hadn't spoken to each other the entire flight, gave one another a long hug after getting out of their seats. "It was nice to see people working together, as in like no one held anyone back from getting off the plane or getting out of their seat, or whatever," he said. "No one was like, 'I need to be first!'"

Working together with the crew to evacuate smoothly may have saved lives, as he reported there was an explosion a few minutes after everyone got off the plane. Phew.

"The most powerful part of today was, there was just people. No countries, no nothing," another passenger said. "There was just people together helping each other." Beautiful.

5. Flying is still dramatically safer than driving

Even with the wave of plane incidents we've seen included, flying is still statistically safer than driving in a car. People are understandably nervous about flying right now, but that's the impact of mass media coverage. If we saw news stories and headlines about every car accident in the country every day, we'd be freaking out about driving cars, but we don't see those. Accidents happen in aviation, but usually only the major commercial plane incidents make national or international news.

If we look just as the numbers, January of 2025 was actually a record low month of airplane accidents nationwide. Not to downplay what's been happening in February, but we've really become accustomed to extreme safety when it comes to flying. The past 15 years have seen the lowest airplane fatalities than any other 15-year period ever, so we should probably wait to freak out too much over the seemingly anomalous accident rate of the past two weeks.

At least that's what I'm telling myself before I hop on my next flight.

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Parenting

Study reveals parents who 'gentle parent' may have higher stress levels than those who don't

An eye opening study shares why.

Photo credit: Canva

Gentle parenting may create more stress than traditional parenting

Gentle parenting continues to be the most talked about new way to parent children. It focuses on recognizing and validating the child's emotional response rather than a form of punishment. The idea is to honor the child's autonomy and respect as a new human in this world while teaching them emotional regulation to better help them navigate life. It's a beautiful theory in the abstract but in practice, the parenting technique isn't as easy as social media makes you believe it is.

Many parents are now reporting struggling with gentle parenting and a recent study gives a surprising answer as to why that might be. When a person is using gentle parenting, they also have to be in charge of regulating their own emotions since you can't help a child regulate theirs if you're not calm. This step can be a bit of a stumbling block for some parents, especially when a behavior continues to occur and frustration sets in.

Parents who use a more traditional parenting approach don't appear to have the same level of stress as those who use gentle parenting. Surprisingly, the stress difference isn't due to lack of boundaries which a lot of people associate with gentle parenting. The increased level of stress for those who gentle parent is actually because there's no definition for gentle parenting according to the study.

Fun Kids GIF by Bed Bath & BeyondGiphy

Essentially, gentle parenting isn't real. There's no group of parenting experts and psychologists that have sat around and laid out the parameters of gentle parenting. It's a term coined by author Sarah Ockwell-Smith though she doesn't take credit for the parenting style she wrote a book titled, "The Gentle Parenting Book: How to raise calmer, happier children from birth to seven." While the book is her version of a "how to guide," there's no real definition of what gentle parenting is or what it entails.

Many parents who claim to use gentle parenting don't associate the style of parenting to the author, it's a term that sort of went viral and caught on. This is leaving new parents struggling to know what gentle parenting is and if they're doing it correctly, adding to their stress.

Parenting Go Get It GIF by Back to the Future TrilogyGiphy

The study by Anne E. Pezalla and Alice J. Davidson observes, "Gentle parenting appears to be distinct from other established measures of parenting approaches in its emphasis on boundaries, yet the enactment of those boundaries is not uniform," before later adding, "a subset of gentle parents who were highly critical of themselves reported significantly lower levels of efficacy than the rest of the sample."

This doesn't mean everyone was dissatisfied with their journey into gentle parenting, on the contrary. Most participants were happy with chossing gentle parenting but the level of stress related to questioning if they were doing it right varied. It's the ones who were critical of their own parenting that seem to struggle the most.

Meaghan Rath Comedy GIF by Children Ruin EverythingGiphy

Pezalla and Davidson highlight, "What seems to be unique about the gentle parenting movement is that it has not been presented or advocated by scholars of human development; rather, it has largely been the product of social media. Considering that parents are increasingly stressed or burned out by their caregiving responsibilities it is imperative that evidence-based guidance is made available to those who are interested in gentle parenting."

There has been a movement away from gentle parenting for some on social media, which may in part be due to the murkiness around what gentle parenting is. But gentle parenting isn't the only way to parent that focuses on teaching emotional regulation and respecting the child's autonomy. Parenting styles have been around for generations and "traditional parenting" has sort of become a catch all for anything not called gentle parenting.

The more traditional parenting styles include authoritarian, authoritative and permissive. Authoritarian parenting tends to be high discipline with little regard for the child's feelings. Permissive parenting is focused on the child's happiness with very few or no boundaries. Authoritative parenting focuses more on warmth towards the child with reasonable boundaries and consequences.

It would seem that gentle parenting takes a page from Dr. John Gottman by using emotional coaching in the parenting approach while adding things from positive parenting and conscious parenting along with what they are seeing online portrayed as gentle parenting. Since there's no evidence-based information around gentle parenting, parents practicing it may continue to feel additional stress versus those who are using more evidenced based approaches like authoritative parenting.

No matter what parenting style you have, raising a child isn't easy so if one parenting style isn't working for you, there are plenty others out there.

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