upworthy
Health

15 ways to get out of a conversation with someone who won't stop talking

You can leave the conversation without being rude, but it can be tricky.

talk too much, social skills, bored woman
via Canva/Photos

A woman is bored by a very long story.

There are few things worse than getting stuck in a conversation with someone who can’t stop talking. It’s even worse when that person is a coworker you must see daily, and they repeatedly chew your ear off. The tricky part is that you want them to stop, but it’s hard without being rude.

Sometimes, it feels like the best thing to do is to walk away. However, there are a lot of people who are neurodivergent and have ADHD or autism and have a hard time noticing the signs that they have been talking too much or noticing other people’s cues that it’s time to wrap it up. So, in those cases, it’s important to be polite because the other person may know they are being rude.

What’s the best way to end a conversation with someone who won’t stop talking? A group of folks online have been discussing the topic, and we put together a list of their most effective ways to exit a conversation. Most of the suggestions are polite, but some folks make the point that if someone is talking up the entire conversation, won’t let anyone get a word in edgewise, and is wasting other people’s time, it’s ok to be a little blunt and walk away. If they're going to be rude, you don't have to be 100% polite.



Here are 15 ways to get out of a conversation with someone who won’t stop talking.

1. Positivity sandwich

"The positivity sandwich works well for anything that can be perceived as critical or negative. Positive/negative/positive. Examples:
'Hey Jim, it was great catching up (positive), but I need to get back to my work, so I can't talk (negative). I love your tie (positive).'"

2. Slow walk back

"I struggled with this for years. If in person, start slowly walking somewhere while talking and, along the way, exclude yourself for some reason. (To use the washroom, do something else, etc.) It takes some practice, but eventually, it’ll become second nature. I now do this all the time. If it’s something remote like a call or video meeting, have your device 'unexpectedly drop.'"

3. Be firm

"A firm 'Excuse me for a moment.' Shuts them up pretty quickly, and it's polite AF."

"Excuse me for a moment, but just stare intently into their eyes, no movement, no sound. But, yeah, I like this."



4. Ear pods

"I have an old lady neighbor who used to pop out with questions whenever I left the house. I started leaving with AirPods in, gesturing that I was on a call. I work from home, so it's believable. I do the same with charity muggers. With my other neighbor, who is ok for 5 mins, I give it 5 mins and say, 'ok, nice to catch up, I gotta dash.'"

5. 'I just remembered...'

"I find the best, most polite conversation breaker is to remember something very important just then. I'll kind of look to the side and do a routine that says, "Oh Crap, I just remembered," and then haul off. Then I'll just apologize later.

'Oh Crap, I was supposed to call X.'
'Oh crap, I was supposed to get with X.'
'Oh Crap, I've got a ZOOM in 5'
'Crap, I totally spaced, I've got to get to X'

I've been in some real face-numbing conversations before I learned this secret and ancient art. It's one fluid motion right out of the conversation. A flinch, a troubled face, a checking of the phone or the time, and walking out."

6. Stay strong

"The absolute most important thing is do not positively engage the conversation. If you contribute, it becomes exponential."

"This is hard for me to do, actually. And I know that it becomes exponentially worse when you engage... I just need to not engage."



7. Just walk away

"My ex-wife would literally just walk away from someone when they wouldn't stop talking. I loved it because it gave me an out from the conversation, lmao."

"I look at it this way: they don't respect my time, so I don't feel like I need to respect their feelings."

8. Conform their point and then bail

"I will usually repeat something they just said and agree with it, rephrase it, and then apologize for talking their ear off and say I need to get going, but it was nice chatting with them and start walking off. 'Yes! Exactly like, obviously, the moon landing was fake. It is ridiculous that more people don't see that. Like obviously, if you look at all the facts you mentioned, people should realize that it's obvious. But man, I'm sorry for taking so much of your time. I need to get going, but it was nice chatting with you.'"

9. The white flag

"When you are approaching your saturation point, throw out a white flag as a warning. Just like a race car driver gets a white flag indicating time constraints, you must throw one before you can legitimately stop a monopolizer in his tracks. For example, You are in your office, and your friend Gary comes by to tell you about his golf game. When you are running out of time, interest, or willpower, you throw a white flag by saying: 'Wow, Gary, that’s an amazing round you shot. Before you continue, I need to let you know that in a few minutes, I have to get back to preparing the budget.' You have politely given Gary the signal that you need to end the conversation shortly. Gary takes another four minutes telling you of his exploits on the twelfth and thirteenth holes. You can now wrap it up by saying: 'Well, Gary, that’s really something. I have to take care of the budget right now. Maybe we can catch up another time.' You can now turn your attention to your budget without worry. You were gracious and obliging, and you gave fair warning that it was time to end the chat."

10. Burst out laughing

"At my previous job, I was in the lunch room with a couple of colleagues. One of them asked about our weekends. My answer was pretty succinct, but the other guy ended up talking for almost half an hour about every single thing that happened to him that weekend. Once I realized how long he'd been talking, I actually burst out laughing. I felt a bit bad explaining why I found it so amusing, but it did at least get him to stop."



11. Is this a speech?

"Don’t put up with this BS. Walk away or explain two people talking is a conversation, you talking is a speech. Do you want to have a conversation or give speeches? Don’t tailor to his narcissism."

12. Look disengaged

"Do what I do. Look as disengaged as possible. Shift weight from one foot to the other. Put your hands on your hips. Look at your phone. Look around the room. Don’t make much eye contact. When people see that you are clearly not a willing participant in what’s essentially a spiel, they’ll typically ask if they’re keeping you. That, my friend, is your get-out-of-jail-free card. If that doesn’t work, walk right towards the door, interrupt him, and tell him you have a whole day’s worth of events planned out and have to be on your way."



13. I will let you go

"I will let you go. I'm sure you're busy, and I have to <what you have to do>. It was nice talking with you. We'll talk later.' Hopefully, they say bye, and then you say bye. If not, then, 'Well, I really gotta go. Talk to you later, bye.'"

"This is a good one, I usually end up saying, 'Oh well, I better let you go then' if they are talking about how much they still have to do, another is 'Well, I don't want to hold you back' I think these work because the other person likes to think they're really busy and have a hectic schedule but really you just haven't got a word in edgeways and good conversation needs to be talking and listening. These only really work if a person brings up what they are about to do, etc."

14. Make it a walking conversation

"Make a move and move nearer to that person like you're gonna walk and talk at the same time, and they will probably back away because of the need for private space. If you were successful, you'd have moved this convo from a stationary one to a moving one. Walk faster so that the other party pants and doesn't talk that much. If he/she still persists, pray and good luck to you because you'll need it."

15. The awkward joke

"My response to these types of conversations used to be that of "running away" because it felt very aggressive and confrontational to me, but now that I've been focusing on learning better listening skills, I've started a new approach. Sometimes, it's making a confusing joke; sometimes, it's a dumb wink or, a poke, or a laugh. It totally depends on the person and the situation, but if you actually listen to them, they are communicating in their body language or what they are saying that they think something is wrong with them. Just like pretty much every member of this group. One of the prime reasons for social skills deficiencies is an inability to communicate difficulty, and it comes out in the emotional intensity of friendly interactions, which drives people away."

From Your Site Articles
social skills
Badge
O Organics
O Organics
Popular

Dad's heartfelt lunch message shows how simple, everyday acts can change lives

You can make a huge difference by using O Organics.

via Meg Sullivan (used with permission) and Canva/Photos

A volunteer hands out food in a food bank and Meg Sullivan shares her dad's kind gesture.

When we consider people who have had a positive impact on the world, we often think of those who have made grand gestures to improve the lives of others, such as Martin Luther King, Jr., Greta Thunberg, or Mahatma Gandhi. Unfortunately, that type of effort is out of reach for the average person.

However, O Organics would like to remind everyone that they can positively impact the world through small, consistent acts of kindness that add up over time. Much like how a small creek can create a valley over the years, we can change lives through small, consistent acts of kindness.

O Organics is dedicated to the well-being of all by nourishing people everywhere with delicious organic foods grown by producers who meet USDA-certified organic farming standards.

Upworthy's Instagram page recently posted a touching example of everyday kindness. Meg Sullivan shared how her father, Tom, peeled oranges for her lunch just about every day from kindergarten through high school. But on the final day of her senior year of high school, he sent his 17-year-old daughter unpeeled oranges with a touching note about how she’d have to start peeling them for herself.



“It’s Time Baby Girl,” he wrote on a wikiHow printout on how to peel an orange with a drawing of himself crying. For the father, this daily ritual was about more than just making lunch; it was about showing that he cared by going the extra mile. “I could have put money on her lunch account,” Tom told Today.com. “But it’s one of those little things I thought was important, that she knows somebody’s taking the time to take care of her.”

The small, daily gesture taught Megan an essential lesson in kindness.

The post reminded people how their fathers’ small acts of kindness meant so much to them. “My dad peeled my oranges until I graduated high school, too. Now, I peel my daughter’s oranges and will for the next 7 plus years,” Katie wrote in the comments. “Love this. My dad peeled mine, too. When I moved out, he gave me an orange peeler gadget,” Mary added.

o organics, albertson's giving backO Organics has a wide array of foods and flavors covering almost everything on your shopping list.via Albertson's

Did you know that every time you go to the supermarket, you can also change the world through small gestures? O Organics not only allows you to feed your family delicious and nutritious organic food, but each purchase also gives back to help people and communities facing food insecurity.

Through contributions from customers like you, O Organics donates up to 28 million meals annually. The company’s contribution is essential when, according to the USDA, 47.4 million Americans live in food-insecure households.

O Organics has a wide array of foods and flavors covering almost everything on your shopping list. “Over the years, we have made organic foods more accessible by expanding O Organics to every aisle across our stores, making it possible for health and budget-conscious families to incorporate organic food into every meal,” Jennifer Saenz, EVP and Chief Merchandising Officer at Albertsons, one of many stores where you can find O Organics products, said in a statement.

O Organics now offers over 1500 items, from dairy products such as eggs and milk to packaged meats and breakfast staples such as cereal bars, granola and oatmeal. You can also enjoy affordable organic produce with O Organics’ fresh salads and fruit.

Everybody wants to make the world a better place. With O Organics, you can feed your family healthy, organic food every time you go to the market while paying it forward by contributing to the company’s efforts to end food insecurity nationwide. That’s a small, daily gesture that can amount to incredible change.

From Your Site Articles
o organics
Education

Job recruiter is surprised when candidate put 671-day streak for Japanese Duolingo on his resume

Clever idea? Or just resume fluff?

@bllshfrv/Reddit, Wikipedia

Nearly two years of learning a language…something's had to have stuck.

In the age of algorithms and keywords and incredibly steep competition, people have to be more strategic and creative than ever to secure a good job. Especially when it comes to drafting a resume that stands out amongst hundreds of others.

Recently, one job recruiter was so impressed by one job seeker’s clever idea of listing their 671-day Duolingo streak—alongside a fluency in English and limited American Sign Language —under the "languages" section in their resume that he decided to share it online.

According to Newsweek, the job recruiter, named Bilal Ashrafov, was pleasantly surprised, and had even considered including something similar on his own resume, “but wasn't sure if it would come across as professional.”

“Seeing someone take that first step made me reflect on its relevance,” he said, noting that “a long-standing Duolingo streak can demonstrate dedication and continuous learning,” even if the popular app only requires a minute of practice a day.

After sharing the resume onto Reddit, others seemed to agree, and commended the potential employee for their innovative approach.

Someone sent a resume with their Duolingo streak under ‘Languages’
byu/bllshrfv induolingo

"Imagine explaining that in an interview—'I'm not just consistent, I'm Duolingo consistent!'" one viewer quipped.

Another commented, "If I was hiring, I would definitely interview this person."

Still another said, "It got noticed, didn't it? Sounds like not too bad of an idea."

Considering that there are a few ways folks can keep their Duolingo streak intact without truly getting proficient in a language, like continuing to purchase streak freezes, this idea might never take on as the new resume must-have. But, on a much broader scale, this story highlights the need to bring a bit of ourselves to our resumes. As the concept of portfolio careers, or a career that includes multiple income streams, rather than a single job title, becomes more and more mainstream, we’ve seen people find great success in listing what they uniquely bring to the table, professional or otherwise.

When it comes to adding resume items that pop, and offer a true reflection for who you really are, think about including:

Soft skills:

These are personal qualities that describe how you work and interact with others, such as conflict resolution or time management, and they are not only gaining importance across the workforce, but are highly transferable across different types of work.

Personal projects:

Whether you got paid for these isn’t paramount here. If you led a community initiative your passionate about, or even have a long-standing blog about something that interests you, this could be included.

Technical skills beyond the job description:

Do you have a proficiency in certain programs, like coding languages, data visualization, project management, etc? Even if a job doesn’t specifically ask for these skills, they could be helpful additions.

Creative or unique hobbies:

You never know what interesting conversations your oddball pastime might inspire, if anything else. So don’t be embarrassed if you’re a wiz a Photoshopping old-timey puppy portraits or engage in recreating Scandinavian folk tunes with GarageBand.

Community involvement:

This can be your volunteering roles, and mentorship programs you might have participated in, or even charities you have close ties to.

Academic achievements:

Include relevant published research papers or presentations, and awards or honors you received during your studies, or any significant contributions you might have made to a research project

These are just a few suggestions to get you started. Include a few, or perhaps your own impressive Duolingo streak, or something else. Just remember, sometimes it pays to think outside the box.

From Your Site Articles
jobs
Heroes

Little League player comforts distraught pitcher whose errant throw hit him in the head

An unforgettable moment.

Photo by Jordan Rowland on Unsplash

A viral video from a Little League game has people celebrating good sportsmanship.

Youth sports have gotten more intensely competitive, to the point where overeager parents and coaches have to regularly be reminded to take it down a notch. So when humanity takes precedence over team rivalries, it's extra heartwarming.

And considering how many "kids these days" laments we see coming from older generations, it's also heartening to see kids showing excellent character qualities when no one directly asked them to.

A viral video from a Little League baseball game is giving us a nice dose of both—good sportsmanship and basic human kindness from two players from opposing teams.

As reported by USA Today, Isaiah (Zay) Jarvis, a batter from Oklahoma, took a pitch from Texas East pitcher Kaiden Shelton right to the side of his helmet. It was a hard blow that caused Jarvis to spin around and crumble to the ground, grabbing his head. The replay in slow motion shows that the ball basically just knocked his helmet off, though it was undoubtedly jarring and probably painful as well.

Jarvis was able to continue playing, but Shelton was shaken up. No matter how fierce the competition, no one wants to be responsible for injuring another person. He was visibly upset on the mound, so Jarvis left first base and approached him.

Watch the classy interchange:

That a kid this age would approach a player who hit him with a ball and comfort him with a hug, especially knowing that all eyes were on him, is just so lovely. Someone raised this young man to put people's feelings ahead of competitiveness and not worry about what others might think.

And the fact that the pitcher was so distraught at the possibility of having hurt someone is also so sweet. This was a moment that showed the true character of both of these boys, and both of them exemplified caring and compassion.

People praised the boys' empathy and humanity.

"Both of those boys are what you want your kids to aspire to," wrote one commenter. "One willing to forgive and knows it wasn't intentional and the other showing remorse and sorrow. I love it!!"

Good sportsmanship all around. Love to see it. Big kudos to these kiddos and whoever raised them.


This article originally appeared three years ago.

From Your Site Articles
sportsmanship
Celebrity

In 2006, the Oscars secretly pressured Heath Ledger to make fun of gay people. He wasn't having it.

Jake Gyllenhaal shared the story of his late Brokeback Mountain co-star's kindness.

hu.m.wikipedia.org
Fájl:Heath Ledger.jpg – Wikipédia

Heath Ledger stayed true to his convictions. He stood up for what he believed in, and it didn't matter if it was in a casual conversation with a friend, on a press junket, or at the Oscars. In a resurfaced video making the rounds, Heath was on the Brokeback Mountain press tour and was asked by an interviewer, "How do you respond to people who suggest this is disgusting?"

Heath seems initially taken aback by the question. He ponders for a moment and then says, "Well, I think it's immature, for one. I think it's an incredible shame that people go out of their way to voice their disgust or negative opinions about the way two people wish to love one another."

- YouTubewww.youtube.com


He then expresses how some might be focusing on the wrong things. "At least voice your opinions on how two people share hate and violence and anger towards each other. Isn't that more important? I think so."

Brokeback Mountain is a 2005 film starring Ledger alongside Jake Gyllenhaal, about two sheep herders in Wyoming who find love with one another. It was adapted from a short story by Annie Proulx, originally published in The New Yorker in 1997.

mountain GIFGiphy

In discussing the movie itself (which won three Academy Awards in 2006, including Best Director for Ang Lee, Best Adapted Screenplay, and Best Original Score), Heath explained, "It's obviously about two men in love. It's gay-themed and easily labeled. The pure fact of it is, it transcends labels. It's the story of two human beings—two souls who are in love."

He truly wanted to make sure that audiences (including the press) understood the entire point of the film. "We're showing that love between two men is just as infectious and emotional and strong and pure as it is with heterosexual love."

While this clip has popped up many times over the years, an interview with Jake Gyllenhaal in 2020 definitively confirmed how important these themes were to Heath. In an interview with Another Man magazine, he discusses how the whole production came together. “There are things you’re chosen for—a quality, an essence—and Ang did that. And it’s still a mystery to me. And something that Heath and I shared: that it was a mystery to us at the time.”

Jake emphasized that Heath put his foot down when some writers of the Oscars telecast wanted to make light of Brokeback Mountain. "I mean, I remember they wanted to do an opening for the Academy Awards that year that was sort of joking about it. And Heath refused. I was sort of at the time, 'Oh, okay... Whatever.' I'm always like, 'It's all in good fun.' And Heath said, 'It's not a joke to me. I don't want to make any jokes about it.'"

According to WION News, Jake reminisced, "That's the thing I loved about Heath. He would never joke. Someone wanted to make a joke about the story or whatever, he was like, 'No. This is about love. Like, that's it, man.'"

From Your Site Articles
heath ledger
Pop Culture

She bought the perfect wedding dress that went viral on TikTok. It was only $3.75.

Lynch is part of a growing crowd of newlyweds going against the regular wedding tradition of spending loads of money.

TikTok

Making a priceless memory.

At first glance, one might think that Jillian Lynch wore a traditional (read: expensive) dress to her wedding. After all, it did look glamorous on her. But this 32-year-old bride has a secret superpower: thrifting.

Lynch posted her bargain hunt on TikTok, sharing that she had been perusing thrift shops in Ohio for four days in a row, with the actual ceremony being only a month away. Lynch then displays an elegant ivory-colored Camila Coelho dress. Fitting perfectly, still brand new and with the tags on it, no less.

You can find that exact same dress on Revolve for $220. Lynch bought it for only $3.75.


The bride-to-be’s video quickly went viral, racking up 2.6 million views. People were floored that Lynch was able to find such a huge deal on a dress that seemed to be made just for her.

@jilly_lynch

so happy with all these finds 🤍

♬ original sound - Jillian

“Honestly, brides pay 1000s of dollars to look that good in a white slip dress like that, I think you’re rocking it & it’s perfect,” complimented one person.

OK, maybe it did cost her a little more than $3.75. In an interview with Insider, Lynch disclosed that she did make some customizations based on suggestions from the comments—”elevating” the gown with nonadjustable shoulder straps, taking in the waist and adding a “demure” bit of lace to the front slit.

Altogether, those alterations totaled out to $110. Add to that some $8 shoes (also thrifted, of course) and Lynch still created an entire wedding look for only $113.75. That, ladies and gentlemen, is a steal.

Lynch is part of a growing line of newlyweds going against the regular wedding tradition of spending loads of money. And she might be better off for it. Research has shown that when it comes to creating happy long-lasting marriages, frugality oftens beats extravagance. With the average wedding cost at around $19,000, and the average wedding dress costing $1800, it certainly makes sense. Weddings are supposed to be fun, celebratory and joyous. It can be hard to feel any of those things when financial stress is involved. Who would want to start off a (hopefully) lifelong partnership that way? Save that money for the honeymoon, I say! Or the gas station!

Still, Lynch didn’t say no to every wedding tradition. As she walked down the aisle in her gorgeous discounted gown, looking like a Grecian goddess, her father walked right alongside her. "I could see how much it meant to him, and it actually ended up meaning a lot to me," she told Insider.

@jilly_lynch

♬ Put Your Head On My Shoulder - Paul Anka

And perhaps most important of all—Lynch felt good in her own skin on her big day. "I don't think I've ever felt that great in something. That's what brides should feel on their wedding day, like they're at their peak beautiful self. That's exactly how I felt when I put it on."

It doesn’t have to cost an arm and a leg to make lasting memories. And when you are able to show up for life’s big moments authentically, that feeling is priceless.


This article originally appeared three years ago.

From Your Site Articles
weddings
Innovation

A small boat made by middle schoolers sailed across the ocean all the way to Norway

This is pretty much the coolest school project ever.

Facebook

The Rye Riptide washed up on the shores of Norway.

This story brings a whole new meaning to the word friendship.

In October 2020, the middle schoolers of Rye Junior High, in Rye, New Hampshire, bid a bon voyage to their handmade mini-boat, which set sail off the coast of New Hampshire to who-knows-where.

Measuring only 5.5 feet, the “Rye Riptides” was indeed a small ship. It ran crewless, but carried a bountiful cargo of colorful artwork made by students, along with a GPS tracking device that reported the boat’s location … sometimes.

Cut to 462 days and 8,300 miles later, and what started out as a simple science project became a surprise discovery for some Norwegian sixth graders, and a fun new connection across the Atlantic.

Rye Junior High had partnered with Educational Passages, a nonprofit organization that aims to connect students around the world to the ocean and each other. Once the kit arrived, the kids started building while learning about ocean currents, science and math. However, science teacher Sheila Adams shares that the more artistic, right-brained activities equally found their way into the curriculum. “The students needed to use their writing skills to inform others about their mini-boat project, describe our school and town to people of other languages, just in case, and write requests to get the boat deployed,” she said in a release.

…not me feeling jealous of some middle schoolers right now…

COVID-19 nearly threatened to knock the Rye Riptides off its course. The boat had been constructed, but not yet decorated, when students were moved to taking class online. Then, there was the matter of launching the boat. Which Cassie Stymiest, director of Educational Passages, noted was “challenging with all the restrictions in place.” Luckily, creativity, resourcefulness and a little technology saved the day. Working remotely, each piece of art was done at home, then scanned, printed and made into a collage. Then, Ms. Stymiest connected with the Sea Education Association (SEA), which set the Rye Riptides on its journey.

Seriously, my inner child is geeking out with this stuff.

Would the boat make it to Europe? Rye student Solstice Reed wasn’t so sure. “Honestly, I thought it would sink,” she admitted to the Portsmouth Herald. Considering the boat was cruising the ocean waters during hurricane season, the skepticism was well-founded. During the more tumultuous periods, the GPS signal only came in intermittently. And for a long while, there was nothing but radio silence.

But then, at long last, on the small Norwegian island of Smøla, the Rye Riptides successfully made it to dry land. Sure, it was a bit dismantled and covered in barnacles, but inside, all the adorable trinkets remained intact. The Smøla students peered with wonder into their bounty of photos, signed facemasks, fall leaves, acorns and state quarters, gifts sent out almost two years ago.

The voyage of the small boat has gone viral in a big way, sailing across social media, and making headlines. And now, Educational Passages plans on facilitating video meet-ups between Rye Junior High and the school in Norway, “to continue building this new relationship to learn from each other and about the shared Atlantic Ocean between them.” Plus, NPR reports, the students of Smøla would be writing a letter to their new American friends.

Human connection found its way across the sea in the most wholesome and magical way. It’s really cool to see that educational programs like this exist, impacting both the hearts and minds of young students. Mission, successful.


This article originally appeared three years ago.

From Your Site Articles
education
Trending Stories