10 people share the 'perfect' thing to say when you see your spouse naked and it's adorable
"Hey you’re wearing my favorite outfit again.”
I think most people in longterm relationships eventually reach a point where seeing your partner step out of the shower doesn't really register for you. There becomes a "normal every day" nudity — changing clothes, bathing, etc. — that is not inherently sexual and therefore no longer warrants celebration.
Unfortunately, that sucks! No one wants to be ogled 24/7 when they're just trying to exist, but at the same time, no one wants to feel like they're invisible to their partner. It's a fine line, and it's easy to see why longterm spouses can lose sight of each other over time and stop appreciating the attraction that initially drew them together.
One guy took to Reddit with this exact conundrum: "My wife is upset that I don't say anything to compliment her when i see her naked, and thinks im not attracted to her even though i am," the user wrote.
He then asked for suggestions on what a husband might say in a situation like this, and the guys and gals of AskMen had thoughts. Here are some of the best responses:
two grey fruits Photo by Nik on Unsplash
The suggestions ranged from the funny or corny...
My husband says “Hey you’re wearing my favorite outfit again” and 12 years later I still blush lol - Impressive_Bat3090
(Side note: I'm stealing this one.)
"You know at the beginning of 'Saving Private Ryan' where Tom Hanks gets an explosive right next to him and he is just trying to focus and there is that high pitched hum and slowly he realises that someone is trying to communicate with him and the humming slowly goes away and he kinda snaps out of it? - Yeah, that's what happens when you walk out naked" -
Tacozy
maybe a 'Dayummmmm' , another user added.
... to the simple yet effective.
I always stop and stare. No matter what I was doing, or about to do. If she takes off her clothes. I stop and stare with a big ass dumb grin on my face. She loves it. ... Also, I can hear when she is finished with the shower. I always manage to just walk in at the right time. ... I will say “WELL HELLO!” - Tollin74
I always say "my god... i'm so lucky!" - Lehvinn
Stare for a bit with a big ol smile. When she asks what you're doing say something along the lines of, "just enjoying the view" Before you walk away - Rexis717
I can also just stop whatever I'm doing drop my jaw and go "wow", "well hello sexy" or whatever else comes to my mind (which usually isn't much at these moments, but that doesn't seem to hurt). I will find my own way of telling her I can't focus when she's naked. Felt like a cave man who can't control his urges doing some of these things in the beginning, but once I noticed that she really enjoys it and that it makes her feel beautiful.. I'm all on board. She deserves feeling every bit like the queen she is in my eyes and more. - onehandedbraunlocker
And some people's stories of how much a little appreciation means to them absolutely blew me away.
My man out of nowhere, whether I’m naked or not, will grab me at random moments and kiss me properly and then hold my face, look in to my eyes and say something like ‘my god you’re a beautiful woman. … we are mid 50s and together many years. What do you love about her physically ? Tell her that. It doesn’t have to be overtly sexual, she’s seeking reassurance and validation. - whatpelican00
My guy just consistently gets happy when I'm naked. He voices his appreciation, sometimes with a dirty word, sometimes with a sweet one, and sometimes he comes closer to touch me. It really makes me feel good about myself. ... It's all about being joyful and sharing the love. - TourquoiseTortoise
And just in case you thought you'd get through this thread without at least one tear-jerker...
My husband intrudes on almost every shower or when I'm changing for a change to peek at skin. If he sees me naked or dressing, he's instantly trying every possible move and pick up line known to man. I feel like if he sees shoulder skin or even an ankle he'll come at me. Sometimes it gets frustrating; but let me tell you. I know he wants me or at least is really good at pretending. We've been together 19 years and this man is still chasing. I have fluctuated massively in my weight having birthed 4 sons and 6 miscarriages. Anywhere from 245 my heaviest to 129 my lightest. Didn't matter, one bit... I could be 600 pounds. This man makes sure to always tell me I'm beautiful and makes me feel so loved and wanted. - queensfanobs81
Experts say it's common for couples to begin taking each other for granted after a while, but it can be combatted with small gestures and a little effort.
Photo by charlesdeluvio on Unsplash
"When have seen your partner naked or in nice underwear for thousands of times, you tend to not pay as much attention to it as you might should be, and the life puzzle makes it extra difficult to stop up and think 'Hey, I love the looks of my partner and they’re so darn attractive'" says Sofie Roos, a licensed sexologist and relationship therapist and writer with Passionerad.
It's also true that as our relationships grow and deepen far beyond physical attraction, which is a good thing, losing sight of our partner's beauty can be an unfortunate side effect. All of us want a look, a touch, a physical compliment every now and then just to be reminded that our partner hasn't forgotten — especially if you're just standing right there in plain sight!
Genuine, specific, and playful comments work best in these scenarios. Something like "You look beautiful," while well-meaning, is a bit of a platitude and can come across empty, even if you mean it. Try to get creative!
Sean O'Neill, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist recommends, "Instead of saying 'You look beautiful' you could say 'That dress doesn’t stand a chance against you' or 'I’m so glad only I get to see this,' playfully. The aim is to make your spouse feel uniquely valued."
And if your brain locks up and you feel awkward and can't think of anything, a playful "Nice butt," never hurt anyone.