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10 car seat safety tips from an expert. Some of these might surprise the most seasoned parent.

Did you know that car accidents are a leading cause of preventable death for children between the ages of 1 and 13? That's a fact.

But we can keep our kids safer by installing and correctly using car and booster seats. And before you roll your eyes and say, “Yeah yeah. Been there, done that," you need to hear what pediatrician Dr. Alisa Baer, also known as The Car Seat Lady, has to say:

“Studies show that even for parents who are on their fourth kid, car seat installation is one of the few things that people tend not to get better at."

This can truly be a matter of life and death, so buckle up — metaphorically, of course — and take a few minutes to read about these ten extremely important tips from Baer.

1. Keep the car seat straps snug.

Image by NHTSA.

“Most kids are riding around with straps that are too loose," Baer says. Properly secured snug straps, despite protests from some kids, don't cause pain. “If you're going to jump out of an airplane with a parachute, you're not going to think, 'Oh, it's snug! Let me loosen it!'" she explains.

Think of the car seat straps the same way. If you need guidance on how to ensure the straps are snug, check out this video. Also be sure to remove any bulky clothing. Things like winter coats usually make it necessary to loosen straps — which in turn makes them far less effective.

2. Keep kids rear-facing for as long as possible.


Image by NHTSA.

Once your child outgrows an infant car seat — which is always rear-facing — they'll move into a convertible car seat. Those can be used either in a rear- or forward-facing position. But “can" and “should" are two different things. Baer says you should always keep your child rear-facing until age 2 — and ideally longer, until they reach the rear-facing limits of the car seat. That shouldn't happen until your kiddo is at least 2 years old, but even then, if they're below the maximums for the car seat, don't flip them around!

A common misconception among parents is that there's a greater risk for leg injuries in the event of a crash in rear-facing car seats because it appears as though a child's legs are scrunched up. Baer assured me that kids are actually at a greater risk for leg injuries when they're forward-facing because in an accident, their feet make contact with the seat in front of them, which is simultaneously moving backward. The result is a compression injury, something that doesn't happen when the child is rear-facing.

“The leg injuries we see when a child is rear-facing are usually due to a direct impact from the intruding vehicle. At that point, it doesn't matter which way your child is facing," says Baer.

3. When your child becomes too big to rear-face, keep them as safe as possible when forward-facing.

Image by NHTSA.

“The goal now that we've turned your child forward, which makes their brain and spine less safe than when they were rear-facing," says Baer, “is to keep them as safe as we can." You can accomplish that by using the tether strap that comes on every single forward-facing car seat sold in the U.S. The tether secures to a top tether anchor point in your vehicle. This is where you'll need to break out that vehicle owner's manual to find where they're located. Since 2000, all vehicles sold in the U.S. are required to have anchors where you can secure the tethers in at least three seating positions. Got a minivan or SUV? Most of these vehicles do NOT have tether anchors in all the rear seats. Find the tether anchors and always use them for forward-facing car seats.

“Forward-facing protection is greatly enhanced by the tether," Baer explains. “It decreases how far the child's head moves in a crash by at least four to six inches. When you factor in that most seats are too loose, that can mean a difference of 12 inches or more." Because you only want your child's head to hit air in a crash and not the seat in front of them, the tethers on forward-facing car seats are vital.

Image by NHTSA.

LATCH can be confusing. It stands for Lower Anchors and Tethers for Children. LATCH is comprised of both parts on the car seat and parts in the vehicle, Baer explains. The government requires all vehicles model year 2003 and newer in the U.S. to have at least two seating positions with lower anchors and at least three positions with tether anchors. The lower anchors are meant to replace the use of the vehicle's seat belt. Most car seats (not booster seats, but actual car seats that have a five-point harness system) can be secured to the lower anchors in vehicles by using the LATCH belt on the child's car seat.

Illustration by The Car Seat Lady, used with permission.


Baer emphasized that no matter how you install the forward-facing car seat — whether with a seat belt or the lower anchors — you should always use the tether. “If you're forward-facing seat is installed with the seat belt, use the tether in addition to the seat belt," she said. “If your forward-facing seat is installed with lower anchors, use the tether in addition to the lower anchors."

So, one more time, because it's that important: Always use the tether on every forward-facing car seat!

4. Don't start using a booster seat too soon — and don't stop using a booster seat too soon.

Image by NHTSA.

For a child to safely use a booster seat, they must be at least 4 years old, weigh 40 pounds, and be mature enough to sit properly in the booster — “no slouching, no leaning over, and no playing with the seat belt." Because of that, Baer says that most kids are generally around 6 years old before they're ready for a booster seat.

When it comes to letting kids dump their booster seats, Baer notes that many parents are doing it too soon. “The goal of a booster is to keep the belt property positioned on a child's body, specifically so the lap belt stays in position on the child's lower hips during a crash."

Baer says that there's a pattern of injuries resulting from children being in accidents while not in booster seats that, while not always fatal, are life altering — things like lower spinal cord injuries resulting in paralysis and bladder and bowel injuries.

The way to prevent those? Keep your kiddo in a booster until the seat belt fits exactly the same without the booster as it does with it. (Check out the five-step test for guidance.) Most kids are 10 to 12 years old before they can ride safely without a booster.

5. Make sure everyone in the car is buckled up.

Besides keeping all of your adult passengers alive, ensuring everyone in the vehicle is wearing a seat belt means they can't become human torpedoes in the event of an accident. “Studies show that if an adult rides in the back without a buckle, the other people in the car are up to three times more likely to die in the same crash because the unbuckled adult is now a human missile," says Baer.

That sounds rather gruesome — and that's because it is. If a car seat is covering a seat belt buckle, for example, reinstall the car seat so that the buckle is available for the adult. It's about everyone's safety.

6. After you install your child's car seat, have it checked by a trained technician.

Image by NHTSA.

While many people think they can swing by a fire or police department to accomplish this, “not even 50% of them have someone trained" to do that, Baer says.

Instead, go to seatcheck.org, where you can enter your zip code to find a trained technician near you.

7. Remember that the center seat is generally the safest spot in the car for kids.

Image by NHTSA.

Children in the center seat won't take a direct hit in an accident, and there's less to hit their head on when they're in a forward-facing car seat. If you have more than one child, remember that your oldest is typically the least protected. “A newborn, for example, is more protected because they're rear-facing," Baer explains. The middle seat often doesn't have the lower anchors, which means you'll need to use the seat belt to secure the car seat (or if your child is in a booster, they'll be using the belt anyway). And remember: If your kiddo is in a forward-facing car seat, use the tether!

8. Don't text or talk on the phone while driving.

“We're not going to make a dent in fatalities until we decrease distracted driving," Baer notes. “We have an obligation to make sure not only our children, but everyone else's children are safe on the road."

9. Car seats expire!

It's not that the car seat industry is out to get your hard-earned cash, Baer says, but rather that "car seats are made of plastic, and plastic is a material that gets brittle with age. You need a seat to be strong enough to withstand an crash." Different car seats have different expiration dates, although they typically last six to eight years. Be sure you know when yours needs replacing — particularly if you're using it with more than one child.

Speaking of which, be sure to put a lot of thought into borrowed or hand-me-down car seats. You should never buy a used car seat online. If you're going to share with friends or use it for more than one child, infant seats that are in good condition are better candidates for sharing than convertible car seats or boosters, which are used for longer and generally experience more wear and tear.

10. If you've been in an accident, there's a good chance that your car seat needs replacing.

Image by iStock.

This holds true regardless of whether your child was in the car seat when the accident occurred because even an empty seat still absorbs some of the force of the crash. Baer says most manufacturers advise that the car seat requires replacement no matter the severity of the crash, but some seats have a “minor crash protocol." You can check her website to learn more.

The top three most common mistakes Baer sees are car seats that are too loose in the car, kids that are too loose in the car seats, and children who are graduated too soon (from rear-facing to forward facing or car seat to booster, for example). With some effort and care, we can all avoid those mistakes and more. It's a lot of info to absorb, but we're talking about our kids' lives.

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Mom leaves a 'heartbreaking' gift to flight passengers sitting next to her baby

"That's a mom trying so hard."

@callmebelly/TikTok

An excellent reminder to show kindness and patience.

Listening to a baby cry during a flight might be aggravating, but it’s nothing compared to the moans, groans, and eyerolls that the baby's parents must endure from other passengers when it happens. No matter what tips and tricks are used to try to soothe a little one’s temperament while 30,000 miles in the air, crying is almost inevitable. So, while having to ease their own child’s anxiety, moms and dads also must suffer being the pariah of the trip. What a nightmare.

Recently, one mom was apparently trying so hard to avoid upsetting her fellow flight members that she went above and beyond to essentially apologize ahead of time if her baby began to cry on its first flight. It was a gesture that, while thoughtful, had folks really feeling for how stressed that poor mom must be.

In a clip posted to his TikTok, one of the passengers—Elliot—explained that the mom handed out small care packages to those nearby.

“She’s already so busy and took the time to make these bags for everyone,” Elliot said, before panning the camera to reveal a Ziplock bag full of candy, along with a note that made him “want to cry.”

The note read: “It’s my first flight. I made a deal to be on my best behaviour—but I can’t make any guarantees. I might cry if I get scared or if my ears start to hurt. Here are some treats to make your flight enjoyable. Thank you for being patient with us. Have a great flight.”

@callmebelly♬ BIRDS OF A FEATHER - Billie Eilish

Like Elliot, those who watched the video felt some ambivalence at the well intentioned act. Many felt remorse that she would feel the need to appease people in this way.

“This is so sweet but also … kind of breaks my heart that we live in a world in which parents feel the need to do that.”

“Because jerk people have shamed parents into believing that they need to apologize for their kids' absolutely normal behavior. What a gem of a mom.”

“You know that sweet mom worried about this trip so much.”

“That poor mom probably spent nights awake … nervous about that flight, thinking of ways to keep strangers happy.”

"That's a mom trying so hard."

Many rallied behind the mom, arguing that making others feel more comfortable with her child being on board was in no way her responsibility.

“No mom should be apologizing. Adults can control their emotions … babies not …. Hugging this mom from a distance.”

“Dear new parents: no you don’t have to do this. Your babies have the right to exist. We all know babies cry. We know you try your best.”

Luckily, there are just as many stories of fellow passengers being completely compassionate towards parents with small children—from simply choosing to throw on their headphones during a tantrum (instead of throwing one themselves) to going out of their way to comfort a baby (and taking the load of a parent in the process). These little acts of kindness make more of an impact than we probably realize. Perhaps if we incorporated more of this “it takes a village” mindset, flying could be a little bit more pleasant for everyone involved.

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Joy

Teenage boy has perfect response when arrogant teacher refuses to believe his real name

He tried to explain his name and she gave him detention.

via Canva/Photos

A teenager has a real problem with his teacher.

As Dale Carnegie once wrote in “How to Win Friends and Influence People,” “A person’s name is to that person, the sweetest, most important sound in any language.” Understandably, people grow very attached to their names to the point that some studies suggest that names play a significant role in our destinies. In fact, people born with the last name Carpenter are more likely to become carpenters when they grow up.

So, it's no wonder people are sensitive about how others pronounce their names. When someone says your name wrong, it can feel very invalidating and make it look like they don't care. That’s probably why many people enjoyed a teenager's tale of getting sweet revenge on an arrogant teacher who refused to say his name correctly.

“My parents named me a shortened version of a posh-sounding name. For the sake of the story, let's say they called me Alex, which is short for Alexander. When this woman called my name, she would always use Alexander. I brought up to her that it was not my name multiple times and asked her to please call me Alex, as that's what my parents called me,” a Redditor shared on the Petty Revenge forum.

“She would always get angry and tell me, ‘Don’t be stupid, no one is named Alex. Your name is Alexander. Alex is just what you want to be called.’ No matter how much I insisted, she refused. At one point, she gave me a detention for asking her to call me my correct name,” he continued.

names, teacher, studentA teacher being stern with her student.via Canva/Photos

The name dispute got so heated that “Alex” was eventually sent to detention for arguing with his teacher. “When I told my parents I was supposed to have a detention for asking my teacher to call me the right name, they were unhappy. So they gave me a trump card to use against her: my birth certificate,” “Alex” wrote.

The next day, the teacher called him Alexander during roll call, but this time, he had the perfect ammunition to fight back: a legal document. “The next day, when she called my name, I once again told her that it wasn't my name. She threatened me with another detention, so I pulled out the birth certificate, put it down on her desk, and said, ‘My birth certificate says my name is Alex, so that's what you will call me. Thanks,’" "Alex" recalled. “The look on her face was priceless, and she started calling me my actual name for the rest of the time I was in her class.”


A person in the comments shared a similar story; this time, it was with the name Joey. “I know someone who on their birth certificate is Joey. The exact same thing happened to him. The teacher kept calling him Joseph, but he refused to answer. After a week, she called his mom and said something along the lines of: tell your son when someone calls him by his proper name, he needs to respond and not be disrespectful to his teacher. The mom questioned what name she was calling him, and she told her. Well, that mother went up one side of her and down the other. Why would I call him Joseph if we would call him Joey? We named him Joey, and that’s what is on his birth certificate. This was back in the ‘80s.”

It’s strange that the teacher went out of her way to call the kid the name she preferred over his wishes. Even if his real name was Alexander, what’s wrong with referring to someone by their chosen name? Brandishing his birth certificate as “Alex” may have felt like sweet revenge for the teenager, but it also shows the teacher and the class an important lesson on why it's important to listen to others.

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Science

Innovative farm in Virginia can grow 4 million pounds of strawberries on less than one acre

This method uses 97 percent less land and up to 90 percent less water than conventional farming.

Photo credit: Canva

A new way to grow strawberries with less land, less water, and more berries.

Strawberry farm harvests aren't something most of us calculate on a regular basis (or ever at all), but the numbers from a strawberry farm in Richmond, Virginia, are staggering enough to make it worth an old-school word problem. If the average American eats 8 pounds of strawberries a year, and an average strawberry farm yields approximately 20,000 pounds of berries per acre, how many people could a 200-acre strawberry field feed?

I won't make you do the math. The answer is 500,000 people. But what if a crop that size, providing enough strawberries for half a million people, could be grown on just one acre instead of 200? It's possible. You just have to go—or rather grow—up, up, up.

Indoor vertical farm company Plenty Unlimited knows a lot about growing up. In fact, it's their entire business model. Instead of the sprawling fields that traditional farming methods require, vertical farms have a much smaller land footprint, utilizing proprietary towers for growing. Plenty has used vertical farming methods to grow greens such as lettuce, kale, spinach and more for years, but now it boasts a vertical berry farm that can yield a whopping 4 million pounds of strawberries on a little less than an acre.

Growing indoors means not being at the mercy of weather or climate inpredictability (barring a storm taking out your building), which is wise in the era of climate change. Unlike a traditional greenhouse which still uses the sun for light, Plenty's indoor vertical farms make use of the latest technology and research on light, pinpointing the wavelengths plants need from the sun to thrive and recreating them with LED lights. Plenty farms also don't use soil, as what plants really need is water and nutrients, which can be provided without soil (and with a lot less water than soil requires). Being able to carefully control water and nutrients means you can more easily control the size, taste and uniformity of the berries you’re growing.

If that sounds like a lot of control, it is. And that idea might freak people out. But when a highly controlled environment means not having to use pesticides and using up to 90% less water than traditional farming, it starts to sound like a solid, sustainable farming innovation.

Plenty even uses AI in its strawberry farm, according to its website:

“Every element of the Plenty Richmond Farm–including temperature, light and humidity–is precisely controlled through proprietary software to create the perfect environment for the strawberry plants to thrive. The farm uses AI to analyze more than 10 million data points each day across its 12 grow rooms, adapting each grow room’s environment to the evolving needs of the plants – creating the perfect environment for Driscoll’s proprietary plants to thrive and optimizing the strawberries’ flavor, texture and size.”

Plenty even has its own patent-pending method of pollinating the strawberry flowers that doesn’t require bees. Even just the fact that this enormous crop of strawberries will be coming from Virginia is notable, since the vast majority of strawberries in the U.S. are grown in California.

strawberry fieldTraditional strawberry farming takes up a lot of land.Photo credit: Canva

Plenty's Richmond farm is currently growing strawberries exclusively for Driscoll’s.

“Partnering with Plenty for the launch of the Richmond Farm allows us to bring our premium strawberries closer to consumers in the Northeast, the largest berry consumption region in the U.S.,” Driscoll’s CEO Soren Bjorn said in a press release. “By combining our 100 years of farming expertise and proprietary varieties along with Plenty’s cutting-edge technology, we can deliver the same consistent flavor and quality our customers love — now grown locally. This new innovative farm is a powerful step forward in continuing to drive category growth in new ways for our customers and consumers.”

Is Plenty’s model the farm of the future? Perhaps it’s one option, at least. The more we grapple with the impact of climate change and outdated, unsustainable farming practices, the more innovative ideas we’ll need to feed the masses. If they can get 4 million pounds of strawberries out of an acre of land, what else is possible?

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Education

'Supercommuter' mom takes a flight to work every day because it's cheaper than living there

She says a 40 minute flight is well worth it financially and emotionally.

Photo credit: Canva

Crazy that she ends up with MORE free time.

Would you commute to work on a plane every day to save money? For Racheal Kaur, a mom who lives in Malaysia, it was a no-brainer. In a recent interview with CNA Insider, Kaur shared how she takes a 40-minute flight from Penang to Kuala Lumpur every single day of the work week, and claimed that being a “supercommuter” isn’t only more cost effective, but also provides more work-life balance.

To get to work by 9am, Kaur gets up and out of the house well before dawn, leaving her house by 5am, and boarding on a plane by 5:55am and arrives in the city with a little over an hour to spare. She then flies for around 40 minutes (enjoying what she calls her “me time”) then repeats the process to get home. Every day, Monday through Friday.

While unconventional, Kaur told CNA Insider that this schedule actually has time to spend with her kids, aged 12 and 11, at night, and even “help with any last-minute homework,” which she feels is “everything” as her kids grow older.

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

From a cost perspective, Kaur apparently pays $223 a month for her current mortgage in Penang, whereas living in Kuala Lumpur would cost around $340 per month. And while Kaur pays out of pocket for her flight, she does receive a discount, and pays the equivalent of $11 USD a day. Overall things even out, and she’s even able to save money.

While this strategy can occasionally get tricker during busier times of the year, since commercial passengers take priority, Kaur assures that considering everything, it’s all “well worth it.”

Previously, Upworthy had highlighted another supercommuter—a student at Berkeley who flew from Los Angeles to the infamously expensive city of San Francisco for class three days a week, using various frequent flyer miles/points from credit card sign up bonuses he had accumulated over the years.

And while this strategy certainly works for some, it might not work for everyone. Steve Kass, a writer for Fast Company and fellow supercommuter, suggest to ask yourself the following questions before committing to the frequent flier lifestyle:

  • Can you handle less downtime?
  • Will it disrupt your sleep schedule?
  • Are you healthy enough to handle the physically demanding task of traveling?
  • Obvious, but important one: is this financially feasible long-term?
  • Do you love your job? If it’s rewarding, the sacrifice feels worth it, Kass says.
  • Can you see yourself doing this long term? If not, is there a deadline you can create for yourself?

And even if this ends up not being a viable option for you, stories like these are good reminders that you really can can forge a lifestyle that meets all your needs, especially if you conjure up a little creative thinking.

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Humor

DoorDash drivers are spilling the tea after mom finds out weird way her 12-year-old gets food

"We listen and we don't judge."

Photo credit: Canva

DoorDash drivers spill about teens' weird delivery instructions

Sometimes you want a little midnight snacky-snack and nothing in the house sounds good, so you DoorDash something tasty before bed. This is something that has become fairly normal in American society since the food delivery option has become available. But when people order a late night treat, they're typically waiting in close proximity to the front door so they can quickly grab their food.

But it seems that's not always the case for everyone that anxiously awaits their food delivery. Claudia Mercer recently learned that her 12-year-old son has been sneaking food through his bedroom window via DoorDash. The mom comes to this realization after reviewing her security footage only to see a car pull into her driveway and a man carrying a bag cut through her grass to get to her child hanging out of his bedroom window.

Mercer uploaded the video to social media where it has more than 700k views, and while her son's late night antics are certainly giggle worthy, the comment section was full of food delivery stories. DoorDashers flocked to the video to spill all the tea on their strange delivery requests.

@claudiamercer5♬ Stealthy mischief(1088178) - KBYS

If you've never ordered from DoorDash, you may not be aware that there's a section for instructions before you complete the order. The instructions box is supposed to be used to tell drivers to leave the food on the table instead of the welcome mat, or to place it inside the cooler next to the front door. But it turns out some people get a bit creative with their instructions when they're attempting to sneak food in their homes, offices or other venues where they don't want others to know.

These DoorDash drivers take their job as seriously as therapists take their HIPAA requirement. They are listening to the instructions given and not judging anything requested because whatever comes through that app is between you and your dasher. No need for the other folks around to know you're eating a second dinner, that's your business, DoorDash is just following directions.

Sneaking Gerry Dee GIF by CBCGiphy

One delivery person shares, "Delivered pizzas to a basket hanging from a second story window once. Cash and tip was in it so I sent them up."

Another DoorDasher writes, "Yep as a Dasher, I have delivered like that before. I had a kid that asked me to deliver it through his window because he didn’t want to eat with[sic] his mom was making for dinner."

Someone else laughs, "As a doordasher. I saw a kid jumped out of a window to come get his food, the directions read “turn off lights and do not get out of the car. Call when you get close” we listen and we don’t judge."

Delivery Dashing GIF by DoorDashGiphy

Seems like kids are sneaky little people as there seems to be a bit of a pattern here as one person admits, "I had a kid tell me how to avoid the camera and wait until his mom left. I felt like a private detective ninja."

Asking someone to fake being a relative is a next level request, "Once I had a kid make me pretend to be his aunt and drop off his food at school."

"I had to door dash for a family. wife told me to hide her milkshake. bc she didn't want to share it with her family. lol," one person shares.

Hungry Amazon Prime GIF by primevideoinGiphy

"I delivered to some teens a few weeks ago. They asked me to deliver to a window behind the bushes so their parents wouldn’t see," a driver adds.

Clearly the DoorDash drivers are only concerned about you getting your food no matter where they need to sneakily drop it off. Hide it under a bush, cool. Put it in the basket hanging from a rope from the second story, no problem. Drop it off behind the school close to the gate, absolutely. They are here to make sure you don't go hungry or have to eat your mom's broccoli casserole and they're doing it without judging. But if you have your dasher going through Indiana Jones level adventures to drop off food, maybe leave them an extra tip for their dedication to your order.

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