See the beautiful wedding video of the man who was buried on the day he was supposed to get married.

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How do you start a story about a man who was buried on his wedding day?

For now, I'll start with the facts. Solomon Chau died in his sleep on Aug. 17, 2015 — eight months after being diagnosed with liver cancer.

That was four days ago as of this writing.

This time last year, Chau and his beloved fiancee, Jennifer Carter, were looking forward to their wedding day, which was scheduled for Aug. 22, 2015.

That's tomorrow, as of this writing. It's hard to know the proper verb tense when you're talking about death. I mean that literally, though it is a strangely apt metaphor befitting of the subject matter.

The point is this: Aug. 22, 2015, is the day of Sol's funeral. In another world, it would have been the start of his married life with Jenn.

Jennifer Carter's wedding dress. Photo by Red Earth Photography. Used with permission.

I could start this story at the beginning, when Sol and Jenn first met.

According to Sol's obituary, it was pure happenstance that Jenn was visiting a friend at Brock University in St. Catharines, Ontario, in October 2007 and that she would wind up at a house party celebrating Sol's 19th birthday.

It was less happenstantial that Jenn would catch Sol's eye amidst the flurry of the evening. And it was absolutely deliberate when he took a more-than-three-hour bus ride around Lake Ontario during a snowstorm in December just to show up at her door and ask her out.

This is the love-conquers-all version, where the happy not-quite-a-couple-yet overcomes adversity — in this case, an actual storm — just to end up in each others' arms.

Jennifer and Solomon together. Photo taken from the GoFundMe campaign run by Solomon's childhood friend.

I could start their story somewhere in the middle, with the epic flash mob Sol used to ask Jenn to be his wife.

It was the spring of 2014, as the obituary tells it. Sol organized a flash mob in the plaza beneath Toronto's CN Tower, complete with dolphin balloons to match Jenn's tattoo in honor of her late sister.

There'd be an intermission, of course; a chance for the audience to catch their breath and revel in the couple's joyous day before the tragic ending in Act III.

Or I could begin closer to the end, with the day that Sol was diagnosed with cancer.

As explained in the couple's GoFundMe campaign, the news came in December 2014, and in those 48 frantic hours, Sol was diagnosed and rushed right into surgery. The doctors were able to successfully remove the tumor that was poisoning his liver. It was scary, sure, and Sol was weak. But then the New Year came, and things were looking up.

The tumor was gone. The cancer wasn't.

The couple's wedding rings. Photo by Red Earth Photography. Used with permission.

The truth is, no matter where I start the story, it still ends the same way: Sol died Aug. 17, 2015.

I wish I could tell you about the power of love, or Sol's miraculous recovery on their wedding day. But I told you up top that that wasn't how this story went. Real life is ugly, and cancer doesn't care for poetry or happy endings.

But what kind of storyteller would I be if I didn't save the best part of their story for last?

You see, Solomon Chau and Jennifer Carter did get to enjoy 128 precious days as husband and wife.

Jenn and Sol's first look on their wedding day. Photo by Red Earth Photography. Used with permission.

It was March 2015 when Sol's cancer returned — just three months after his initial diagnosis and the emergency surgery they thought had been successful. This time, he and Jenn were told that the ending was inevitable, just as I told you.

Less than two weeks after Sol's fateful diagnosis, the city of Toronto rallied together behind the couple and surprised them with an unforgettable wedding on April 11, 2015.

Jenn and Sol with their bridal party. Photo by Red Earth Photography. Used with permission.

In just three days, more than $50,000 was raised on GoFundMe to throw the couple a lavish wedding, and otherwise-expensive wedding vendors like Boundless Wedding video (who shared this story with me) and Red Earth Photography and Liberty Entertainment Group volunteered their services free of charge to give Sol and Jenn the happy day they deserved. The events of the day took place across Toronto, everywhere from the Ritz-Carlton Hotel to Toronto's picturesque Casa Loma castle and featured a brief reprise of Sol's flash-mob proposal.

All 70 guests kept their spirits high despite the tragic elephant in the room. Because sometimes, that's the only thing you can do.

And even though Sol was buried on the day his wedding was supposed to take place, Jenn will always have memories of their happy wedding day.

And I'll leave you with this, something to think about:

Some people joke about their " Kardash-iversary" — 73 days after the wedding, at which point their marriage has officially lasted longer than that of Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries. I was recently married, and instead, I'll be thinking about our Sol-iversary. That will be in October (coincidentally, on Sol's birthday), 128 days after our own wedding — the amount of time that Sol and Jenn had together, and how grateful we all should be for every single day.

I didn't know of Solomon Chau until Thursday afternoon (which is today, or two days ago, depending how we're counting). I don't presume to know what legacy he would have liked to leave behind, and it would be a disservice if I wrote some cliche platitudes about life and love and death. What I can do is what I've done here, which is share his story, and hope that maybe Sol's story could bring some light into your life, too.

Sol is survived of course by his wife, Jennifer Carter, and his family has asked for any donations to be made to the Tim Horton's Children's Foundation or Temmy Latner Centre for Palliative Care.

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Subaru

Joy

5 things that made us smile this week

Grab your tissues and read some seriously good news.

Grab your tissues and get ready for some seriously good news.

True

After a harrowing election season, we could all use an emotional pick-me-up. Thankfully, the internet never fails to deliver. Check out five uplifting stories we’ve found that made us smile this week.

Enjoy—and don't forget to share the love!

1. This toddler's adorable reaction

@vita.paskar This is when things start to get exciting 🥹 when they begin to understand! #fyp #christmas #target #toddler ♬ Rockin' Around The Christmas Tree - Brenda Lee

Victoria Paskar’s son Ellis had just been born last December, so when it came to appreciating the magic of the holiday season, it wasn't something he was really able to do. This year, however, that’s changed: In an adorable TikTok video, Paskar caught the moment when Ellis (now a toddler) notices the lit-up trees and holiday decorations. So magical and pure in every way.

2. More meals for seniors in need

Subaru - Share the Love Event and Meals on Wheels

Hunger is a national problem, and one that Subaru is helping to fix. Thanks to the Subaru Share the Love Event, Subaru has delivered more than 4.6 million meals and friendly visits to seniors facing hunger and isolation. Since 2008, Subaru is the largest automotive donor to Meals on Wheels—and they’re just getting started. With every new Subaru sale, Subaru and its retailers donate at least $300 to charities like Meals on Wheels.

3. This five-year-old piano prodigy brings down the house with Mozart

Alberto Cartuccia Cingolani wows audiences with his amazing musical talents.Pianoforte/Facebook

A clip of a five-year-old performing at the 10th International Music Competition in Italy is now going viral, and it’s no surprise why. To little to even reach the pedals with his feet, Alberto Cartuccia Cingolani still wows the audience with a masterful performance of a Mozart piece. According to his mother, Alberto had participated in seven national and international music competitions and won first place in all of them, all by the time he was four and a half. It’s like he’s channeling Amadeus himself.

4. An adopted man reunites with his bio mom and forms a "sweet" connection

Lenore Lindsey and Vamarr HunterABC 7 / YouTube

When 50-year-old Vamarr Hunter decided to take a genealogy test to find his biological mother, he had no idea how close he had already been to finding her. After a genealogy test, Hunter discovered that his mother, Lenore Lindsey, who had given him up for adoption as an infant, was actually the owner of “Give Me Some Sugar” in South Shore Chicago—Hunter’s favorite bakery. The two experienced an “immediate connection” after meeting, and after Lindsey suffered a stroke, Hunter stepped in to manage the bakery full-time. No, you’re crying.

5. A teacher uses AI to inspire her classroom

See on Instagram

Now this is wholesome: An elementary teacher in Turkey named Gülümser Balci used artificial intelligence to create images of her students as their future selves in their dream jobs. Each kid is shocked and delighted to see themselves as adults, living out their dreams.

For more things that'll make you smile, check out all the ways Subaru is sharing the love this holiday season, here.

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uplifting

Education

Why didn't people smile in old photographs? It wasn't just about the long exposure times.

People blame these serious expressions on how long they had to sit for a photo, but that's not the whole picture.

Public domain images

Photos from the 1800s were so serious.

If you've ever perused photographs from the 19th and early 20th century, you've likely noticed how serious everyone looked. If there's a hint of a smile at all, it's oh-so-slight, but more often than not, our ancestors looked like they were sitting for a sepia-toned mug shot or being held for ransom or something. Why didn't people smile in photographs? Was life just so hard back then that nobody smiled? Were dour, sour expressions just the norm?

Most often, people's serious faces in old photographs are blamed on the long exposure time of early cameras, and that's true. Taking a photo was not an instant event like it is now; people had to sit still for many minutes in the 1800s to have their photo taken.

Ever try holding a smile for only one full minute? It's surprisingly difficult and very quickly becomes unnatural. A smile is a quick reaction, not a constant state of expression. Even people we think of as "smiley" aren't toting around full-toothed smiles for minutes on end. When you had to be still for several minutes to get your photo taken, there was just no way you were going to hold a smile for that long.

But there are other reasons besides long exposure times that people didn't smile in early photographs.

1800s photographs Why so serious? Public domain

The non-smiling precedent had already been set by centuries of painted portraits

The long exposure times for early photos may have contributed to serious facial expressions, but so did the painted portraits that came before them. Look at all of the portraits of famous people throughout history prior to cameras. Sitting to be painted took hours, so smiling was out of the question. Other than the smallest of lip curls like the Mona Lisa, people didn't smile for painted portraits, so why would people suddenly think it normal to flash their pearly whites (which were not at all pearly white back then) for a photographed one? It simply wasn't how it was done.

A smirk? Sometimes. A full-on smile? Practically never.

"Mona Lisa" by Leonardo da Vinci, painted in 1503Public domain

Smiling usually indicated that you were a fool or a drunkard

Our perceptions of smiling have changed dramatically since the 1800s. In explaining why smiling was considered taboo in portraits and early photos, art historian Nicholas Jeeves wrote in Public Domain Review:

"Smiling also has a large number of discrete cultural and historical significances, few of them in line with our modern perceptions of it being a physical signal of warmth, enjoyment, or indeed of happiness. By the 17th century in Europe it was a well-established fact that the only people who smiled broadly, in life and in art, were the poor, the lewd, the drunk, the innocent, and the entertainment […] Showing the teeth was for the upper classes a more-or-less formal breach of etiquette."

"Malle Babbe" by Frans Hals, sometime between 1640 and 1646Public domain

In other words, to the Western sensibility, smiling was seen as undignified. If a painter did put a smile on the subject of a portrait, it was a notable departure from the norm, a deliberate stylistic choice that conveyed something about the artist or the subject.

Even the artists who attempted it had less-than-ideal results. It turns out that smiling is such a lively, fleeting expression that the artistically static nature of painted portraits didn't lend itself well to showcasing it. Paintings that did have subjects smiling made them look weird or disturbing or drunk. Simply put, painting a genuine, natural smile didn't work well in portraits of old.

As a result, the perception that smiling was an indication of lewdness or impropriety stuck for quite a while, even after Kodak created snapshot cameras that didn't have the long exposure time problem. Even happy occasions had people nary a hint of joy in the photographs that documented them.

Even wedding party photos didn't appear to be joyful occasions.Wikimedia Commons

Then along came movies, which may have changed the whole picture

So how did we end up coming around to grinning ear to ear for photos? Interestingly enough, it may have been the advent of motion pictures that pushed us towards smiling being the norm.

Photos could have captured people's natural smiles earlier—we had the technology for taking instant photos—but culturally, smiling wasn't widely favored for photos until the 1920s. One theory about that timing is that the explosion of movies enabled us to see emotions of all kinds playing out on screen, documenting the fleeting expressions that portraits had failed to capture. Culturally, it became normalized to capture, display and see all kind of emotions on people's faces. As we got more used to that, photo portraits began portraying people in a range of expression rather than trying to create a neutral image of a person's face.

Changing our own perceptions of old photo portraits to view them as neutral rather than grumpy or serious can help us remember that people back then were not a bunch of sourpusses, but people who experienced as wide a range of emotion as we do, including joy and mirth. Unfortunately, we just rarely get to see them in that state before the 1920s.

From Your Site Articles

history

Science

Optometrists warn people against waterproof mascara due to the risk of unsightly eye damage

It can enter the tear film and get absorbed into the eyelid.

Photo credit: Canva

Waterproof mascara is causing eye damage according to optometrists

Eyes are a very sensitive part of the body, they quickly remind people of that when a spec of dust dares to sneak beneath the eyelid. The near microscopic dust particle suddenly feels like a large piece of spiked gravel refusing to dislodge itself no matter how much our eye waters trying to release it. The same goes for pretty much anything that makes its way into your eye.

Your own eyelashes that are supposed to serve as sentries standing guard to keep things out of your eyes sometimes betray you by falling directly into them. Just about anything can cause eye irritation and makeup is no different, especially if you rub your eyes while wearing it. But optometrists are warning against one particular type of eye makeup–waterproof mascara.

Yes, one of the greatest makeup inventions to come out of the twentieth century. Though the first version of waterproof mascara made in 1938 contained turpentine which of course resulted in unpleasant reactions, it was perfected in the 60s. No more worries about looking like a raccoon if you're caught in the rain or worse, have your feelings hurt and begin to cry. The popularity of the cosmetic exploded once the toxic ingredient was removed, yet eye doctors are saying to stay away. Why?

person with lighted cigarette in mouth Photo by Brands&People on Unsplash

Several optometrists have taken to social media and YouTube over the years to discuss the risk of wearing waterproof mascara and eyeliner.

Dr. Gurleen Dhanoa explains, "it's right there in the name, waterproof mascara. Waterproof meaning it will not breakdown when in contact with water and our tear film is mostly comprised of water," she says before continuing to answer a commenter's question. "So when waterproof makeup enters the eye and tear film, which is inevitable, makeup is going to get into the eye, it doesn't breakdown and then it has nowhere to go but into the structures."

@eyestheticsofficial Replying to @e #greenscreen why id never recommand using waterproof mascaras #mascara #waterproof #makeup #makeupremoval #eyecare #lashes #waterproofmascara #eyes #eyedoctor #optometrist #doctorsoftiktok ♬ original sound - EYEsthetics | Optometrists

Once the waterproof makeup enters the structures of the eye it can cause a lot of damage, inflammation and irritation. This can cause people a lot of frustration because they may constantly feel like something is in their eyes which means more rubbing of the eyes leading to more irritation.

Ophthalmologist, Dr. Rupa Wong says, "if you do use waterproof makeup just remember to remove it thoroughly, it does take a little bit more work than regular eye makeup but you want to remove your eye makeup every single night. Don't be lazy, this is important because otherwise you can be prone to infections, inflammation, lash mites, none of the stuff that you want."

Several eye doctors have cited studies and their own experience seeing patients experiencing eye irritation as the result of waterproof mascara getting into the tear film of the eye. One doctor shares that his patient hadn't worn mascara in over ten years yet when he looked under her eyelid, the small black specs from that previously worn mascara were speckled throughout her eye's tear film. But how on earth do you get the mascara out of the tear film once its embedded?

Monica M. Dweck, MD, an ophthalmologist at the New York Eye and Ear Infirmary of Mount Sinai tells Ophthalmology Advisor, that improper removal of eye makeup and sleeping in eye makeup can clog the meibomian glands which can lead to meibomian gland dysfunction to which there is no cure. “It can be managed, and it can be controlled, but there’s no cure.”

@doctoreyehealth Did you know!? —> Mascara and other eye makeup products can sometimes get trapped under the eyelid and be absorbed into the eyelid tissue. It’s essential to be cautious when applying eye makeup and to remove it thoroughly using gentle makeup removers specifically designed for the eyes. Additionally, practicing good eye hygiene and avoiding excessive rubbing or touching of the eyes can help reduce the risk of makeup particles getting trapped under the eyelid and absorbed into the eyelid tissue. If you ever experience discomfort or notice makeup residue accumulating under your eyelid, it’s a good idea to consult with an eye care professional for guidance and proper care. DISCLAIMER: All content in this video and description including information, opinions, content, references and links is for informational purposes only. The Author does not provide any medical advice on the site. Nothing contained in this video or it’s description is intended to establish a physician-patient relationship, to replace the services of a trained physician or health care professional, or otherwise to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. You should consult a licensed physician or appropriately-credentialed health care worker in your community in all matters relating to your health. All non-licensed clips used for fair use commentary, criticism, and educational purposes.
♬ original sound - Doctor Eye Health

The meibomian glands help produce the oil needed to make tears which are constantly produced by your eyes to keep them from drying out. But when speaking to the Ophthalmology Advisor, Dr. Di Meglio reports that they can die out when makeup is consistently applied to the waterline. "If those glands die out, they can be gone forever… If you’re putting eyeliner along there, you’re giving yourself a little bit more of a chance of having gland dysfunction. If the oil stays stagnant…the glands themselves can atrophy.”

Waterproof mascaras and other eye makeup may be fantastic inventions to help keep things from running down your cheeks on humid or rainy days but the risk of wearing it daily may be too much for some people. Whether you should wear it or not is split amongst the different eye doctors with some saying don't wear it at all and others saying occasional use is fine as long as you remove it properly and avoid ever sleeping in it. It's up to each individual person to decide if they're willing to take the risk.

From Your Site Articles

makeup causes eye damage

Fatherhood

People applauded after Mark Wahlberg confronted the DJ at his daughter's dance party

Dad to the rescue.

via TheEllenShow / YouTube

Mark Wahlberg on "The Ellen Show."

Four years ago, actor Mark Wahlberg attended a daddy-daughter dance with his then 10-year-old, Grace. Sadly, Grace had no interest in seeing her father strutting his stuff on the dance floor. "I didn't get one dance," Wahlberg told Ellen DeGeneres. "And I told her we were going to do the whole big circle and I was going to go off. And she said, 'Dad, if you embarrass me, I will never talk to you again.' But what she did do is she hung out with me."

No matter who your dad is, especially if you're a 10-year-old-girl, you have zero desire to see him dance in front of your friends. But the parents at the dance probably would have had a blast seeing Wahlberg bust out some of his old-school '90s Marky Mark moves. However, Wahlberg couldn't help but leave his mark on the music being played at the dance.

Let's not forget, he didn't get famous for his acting but for showing off his abs in the "Good Vibrations" video.

Being that Wahlberg's time as a pop star was three decades ago, he couldn't believe it when he heard the music being played at the dance.

"[Grace] sat there on the edge of the stage, by the DJ. And then I'm sitting there with one other dad and I'm like, 'This is not an edited version of this song. There are explicit lyrics being played at a school dance for girls and I'm like no good,'" he said.

"I told the DJ and he's like, 'Oh, I thought it was.' I said, 'What are you doing?' I'm hearing F-bombs and this and that's not okay," Wahlberg said.

He's right. There's no place for music with explicit lyrics at a dance for 10-year-old children.

Wahlberg says the DJ didn't know he wasn't playing the edited version, but it's probably more likely that he didn't even realize the song was a problem. Pop music these days is filled with a numbing amount of violent and misogynistic lyrics.

A recent study from the University of Missouri found that nearly one-third of pop songs contain lyrics that degrade or demean women by portraying them as submissive or sexually objectified.

Currently, three of the top five songs on the Billboard Top 40 contain the word "bitch." One of them is sung in Korean.

It's odd that Americans have become more sensitive to misogyny in pop culture in films, television, and comedy, but still have a huge cultural blind-spot when it comes to music.

That's not a good thing, especially when pop music is marketed to teenagers.

"We know that music has a strong impact on young people and how they view their role in society," said Cynthia Frisby, a professor in the Missouri School of Journalism.

"Unlike rap or hip-hop, pop music tends to have a bubbly, uplifting sound that is meant to draw listeners in," Frisby continued. "But that can be problematic if the lyrics beneath the sound are promoting violence and misogynistic behavior."

Let's face it, pop stars are role models. Their examples show young people what to wear and how to behave. That's not to say that kids will blindly follow someone just because they like their music. But it has an undeniable effect.

Wahlberg, and any parent who monitors what their kids are listening to, deserve credit for protecting the minds and hearts of their kids.

Frisby has some great advice for parents concerned about negative imagery in pop music.

"Ask your daughters and sons what songs they like to listen to and have conversations about how the songs might impact their identity," Frisby said.

"For example, many songs might make young girls feel like they have to look and act provocative in order to get a boy to like them, when that isn't necessarily the case. If children and teens understand that what they are hearing isn't healthy behavior, then they might be more likely to challenge what they hear on the radio."