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He is black. He is privileged. And all of that concerns his parents.

At first I didn't understand why two parents wanted to film their son's journey through prep school. But once they started telling their story, I totally got it.

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The Atlantic Philanthropies

Meet Joe Brewster.

Meet Michèle Stephenson.

Michèle and Joe are married with two kids. Their oldest son is named Idris. At the age of 4, Idris was accepted into The Dalton School, a super-elite and rigorous college prep school, where he was one of few black students from a middle-class family.

"I want my son to have the best education possible. Although he's not technically from an upper class, Idris is very privileged and bright." — Joe Brewster

Both Joe and Michèle grew up poor. Joe became a doctor and Michèle a lawyer. So their son has been afforded opportunities they never had. That's great, but it's also really scary to them.

"I just don't want Idris to be hurt. I don't want for his self esteem to suffer. ... In any environment that you're in, whether it's Dalton or elsewhere, race always plays a part in how the students are perceived, in how we perceive as parents our role in that environment. How we interpret what the school says, how the school reacts to the kids and reacts to us as parents. It's always there as an undercurrent." — Michele Stephenson

So, they decided to film their son Idris' experience for 13 years — from the time he started kindergarten at 5 to his graduation at the age of 18.

Each year Idris talks about his feelings as they relate to race and class on tape. It's interesting to check out his observations year after year.

Age 5

Age 9

Age 10

Age 11

Age 17

Then the 17-year-old added:

"The students ... a lot of them, live in this bubble, and during the course of my life, it's created a divide between my school life and in my race. I've been around a lot of black people outside of school, and they have a totally different way of living, totally different way of speaking and going about their daily lives. I really do feel a sense of two-ness. "

While Idris' parents were super-concerned about how he would confront race and class issues at school, all in all, they still wouldn't trade the experience.

Whoa. This kind of reminds me of my experience growing up. Two-ness — I can so relate. I wonder how many other kids in this situation have felt like this? Click below to preview the rest of this fascinating documentary.

Parenting

Devastated dad shares why he didn't tell his 10-year-old daughter it was her birthday

“I don’t know if we made the right decision…It’s killing us.”

@kylephilippi/TikTok

“Today’s her birthday, and we’re pretending like it’s just another day."

Kid’s birthdays are both lovely moments of celebration, and potential sources of stress for any parent, for various reasons. For dad Kyle Philippi (whom we’ve previously covered for dressing up as Jafar to cure his friend of an irrational phobia), his daughter’s 10th birthday was particularly full of anguish—since he didn’t tell her it actually was her birthday.

In a video posted to his TikTok that amassed close to 3 million views, the concerned dad shared his unique plight that brought him to this unusual decision: his daughter’s birthday falls on Jan 2, over winter break, meaning most kids wouldn’t be able to attend her birthday party. Two years prior, the Philippi found this out the hard way, when they tried to throw a party on the day, and no one showed.

“She was devastated,” Philippi let out through a sigh.

@kylephilippi We’re about 60/40 on whether this was a good idea… #birthday #parenting #parentingtips#autism #autismawareness #autismacceptance #auditoryprocessingdisorder #surprisebirthday #birthdayparty ♬ original sound - Kyle Philippi

Then last year, they tried a different approach. Instead of a big social gathering on Jan 2, they had a more intimate environment of just the family and one close friend, followed by a proper party once winter break was finished. At this point Philippi explained that his daughter is on the spectrum and had auditory processing disorder—so even though she had fun at both events, she still couldn’t understand why her friend couldn’t show up on her actual birthday, and was still disappointed. That’s never what any parent wants for their kid.

To make matters more sensitive, Philippi shared that his daughter was beginning to not be invited to other classmates' parties, and suspected that part of why she yearns to have a party with all her friends there was because “she knows she’s not getting to go to everyone else’s birthday.”

Hence why Philippi and his wife decided to try something new by simply not acknowledging the birthday until they can do a party with his daughter’s school friends. Understandably, though the choice was made with the best of intentions, when Jan 2 came, there were tons of conflicting feelings.

Photo credit: Canva

“I don’t know if we made the right decision. But here we are,” Philippi shared. “Today’s her birthday, and we’re pretending like it’s just another day…and it’s killing us.”

Down in the comments people—especially those with special needs kids, or were autistics themselves—were quick to reassure Philippi that he made a tough, but right call.

“As an autistic person who struggles with birthdays, you’re doing the right thing. it’s a little unconventional, but so are kids like us!! keep it up,” one person wrote.

Another added, “these ‘decisions’ are so hard but you are doing great by taking it all into consideration and trying to do what will help her feel great on her birthday.”

It seems the real thing worth noting here is that Philippi and his wife are trying to make their kid’s birthday the best it can be for her, and that’s truly admirable. Odds are nearly every parent can relate to this on some level. And for parents with neurodivergent kiddos, that can often mean navigating uncharted territory. Maybe they’ll try a different approach next year. Maybe not. What matters is they’re trying.

And from the looks of it, the actual birthday wasn’t a total wash. In a follow up video, we see that Philippi’s daughter got her favorite chicken wings for dinner, and got to plan her upcoming birthday…which will apparently be Raggedy Ann themed.

@kylephilippi Replying to @mamamcsorley1 She ate her favorite meal today and we continued to plan out her ultimate birthday party in 9 days 🙂 #birthday #parenting #parentingtips #autism #autismawareness #autismacceptance #auditoryprocessingdisorder #surprisebirthday #birthdayparty ♬ original sound - Kyle Philippi

Naturally, Philippi will be going as Raggedy Andy, per his daughter's request.

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Heroes

Pizza guy whose quick thinking saved a woman's life gets the reward of a lifetime

He saw her trapped in her own home, begging for help.

via WITI Milwaukee

Joey Grundl, Milwaukee pizza guy.

Joey Grundl, who was working as a pizza delivery driver for a Domino's Pizza in Waldo, Wisconsin, was hailed as a hero for noticing a kidnapped woman's subtle cry for help. It's a timeless story that continues to resonate with people today.

Back in 2018, the delivery man was sent to a woman's house to deliver a pie when her ex-boyfriend, Dean Hoffman, opened the door. Grundl looked over his shoulder and saw a middle-aged woman with a black eye standing behind Hoffman. She appeared to be mouthing the words: "Call the police."

"I gave him his pizza and then I noticed behind him was his girlfriend," Grundl told WITI Milwaukee. "She pointed to a black eye that was quite visible. She mouthed the words, 'Call the police.'"

domestic abuse, celebrity, community, kidnapped

The Dean Hoffmann mugshot.

via WITI Milwaukee

When Grundl got back to his delivery car, he called the police. When the police arrived at the home, Hoffmann tried to block the door, but eventually let the police into the woman's home.

After seeing the battered woman, Hoffmann was arrested and she was taken to the hospital for her wounds.

Earlier in the day, Hoffman arrived at the house without her permission and tried to convince her to get back into a relationship with him. He then punched her in the face and hog tied her with a vacuum power cord.

"If you love me, you will let me go," she pleaded, but he reportedly replied, "You know I can't do that." He also threatened to shoot both of them with a .22 caliber firearm he kept in his car. The woman later told authorities that she feared for her life.

An alert pizza delivery driver helped save a woman from her abusive ex-boyfriend, police say. A 55-year-old Grafton man now faces several counts of domestic ...

A day later, Grundl was seen on TV wearing a hoodie from Taylor Swift's "Reputation Tour" and her fans quickly jumped into action, tagging Swift in photos of the hero. Grundl already had tickets to go to an upcoming Swift concert in Arlington, Wisconsin, but when Swift learned of the story, she arranged to meet Grundl backstage.

"She … she knew who I was," Grundl jokingly tweeted after the concert. "I'm thoroughly convinced Taylor gave me a cold."

"This has been one of the most exciting weeks of my life," Grundl said. "I'm legitimately getting emotional and I almost never get like this. But as the likely most memorable week of my entire life comes to an end … I guess I can really say … I'm doing better than I ever was."


This story originally appeared four years ago.

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Joy

17 Gen X memes for the generation caught in the middle

Gen X is so forgotten that it's become something of a meme. Here are 17 memes that will resonate with just about anyone born between 1965 and 1980.

Photo from Reddit

Boomers, Millennials, and Gen Z

"Generation X" got its name in the early '90s from an article turned book by Canadian writer Douglas Coupland. And ever since, they've been fighting or embracing labels like "slacker" and "cynic." That is, until Millennials came of age and all that "you kids today" energy from older generations started to get heaped on them. Slowly, Gen X found they were no longer being called slackers...they weren't even being mentioned at all. And that suits them just fine.

Here are 17 memes that will resonate with just about anyone born between 1965 and 1980.

Gen X basically invented "Whatever."

gen x memesSOURCE: TWITTER

Until recently, Generation X has been sitting back and watching as Millennials and Boomers eat at each other with an amused, non-confrontational attitude. But recently, Millennials and Gen Z became aware of their presence, and dubbed them "The Karen Generation."

They seem to be embracing the Karen thing.

SOURCE: X

While I'm pretty sure the "Karen" thing is not complimentary—as BuzzFeed puts it, it's meant to communicate someone who is "the middle-aged white mom who is always asking for the manager and wondering why kids are so obsessed with their identities,"—lots of people landed on a different Karen to represent the generation: the martini-guzzling, wise-cracking Karen Walker.

Get it right!

SOURCE: X

Well [expletive] me gently with a chainsaw, she's right. The 1980s cult classic starring Winona Ryder and Shannen Doherty really is the Mean Girls of the '80s and a much better term than Karen.

The disdain is mutual...

The Breakfast Club

SOURCE: X

Most of my Gen X friends have Gen Z kids and they are intergenerationally very chill with each other. However, Gen X is the generation most likely to have Boomer parents and younger millennial kids, and this meme seems to be resonating a bunch with Xers of a certain age.

A lot of Xers are enjoying the "OK boomer" squabble.

SOURCE: X

The media tends to ignore Generation X as a whole—as a few tweets coming up demonstrate—and that's nothing new. After all, they're used to it. They were latchkey kids whose parents both worked long hours, so they're used to being somewhat neglected.

"No one cares what we think anyway..."

via GIPHY

This GIF of Janeane Garofolo mocking her classmates at the high school reunion is basically a whole Gen X mood and definitely captures how a lot of this generation caught in the middle feels about the "OK boomer" wars.

A whole mood.

SOURCE: X

Gen X: "Look, don't pull us into this. You'll make me spill my beer."

Gen X: Get used to it.

SOURCE: X

Perhaps Gen X's blasé attitude to the generation wars has something to do with being called "Slackers" for a full decade.

Pass the popcorn.

SOURCE: X

Aside from this whole "Karen generation" blip, Gen X continues to be largely overlooked, and that fact—as well as their silent delight in it—is possibly one of the most Generation X things to happen.

Pay no attention to the man behind the venetian blinds.

SOURCE: X

Back in the '90s, Gen X bore the same kind of criticism Boomers tend to heap on Millennials and Gen Z now. It's not necessarily that they want to watch a cage match. It's just they're so relieved the heat is aimed elsewhere.

See?

SOURCE: TWITTER

Although this chart doesn't list the generation names, the approximate age ranges are all there...except for a big gap between the ages of 35 and 54 where apparently no humans were born? Poor Gen X (and some elder Millennials) apparently don't have political beliefs worth examining.

Don't you forget about me...

SOURCE: X

If Millennials are the "burnout generation," I guess Gen X is truly the invisible generation. I'm starting to feel inspired to write a science fiction novel where everyone born from 1965 to 1980 inhabits a totally different dimension.

There are perks to being invisible...

SOURCE: X

Being overlooked can be an advantage when you just want to sit in the corner and be immature.

Party on.

SOURCE: X

Before Brené Brown was telling us all how to dare greatly, Gen X got their inspirational advice from a different kind of Ted and his pal Bill, who taught us all how important it is to learn from history and be excellent to each other.

Too late and yet too early.

SOURCE: X

Romance—or getting lucky—was never easy for Generation X. They were the generation most impacted by the AIDS epidemic when it comes to anxiety about casual sex. Whereas Boomers had the free love of the late '60s, Gen X was about safe sex, which usually meant less sex. And even when having safe casual sex, singles in the '90s had to meet people the old-fashioned way or, if they did meet online, they felt shame over it. Now online dating is the norm.

When Gen X replaces the Boomers.

SOURCE: X

This is probably an optimistic view—because the truth is there are "Boomers" in every generation, and many of them tend to find their way into powerful positions. Let's call this a best case scenario, though.

The Nihilism Generation

SOURCE: X

There is no generation more over it than Gen X. They are ready for the apocalypse, but don't expect them to, like, help or anything!

Now we have Generation Alpha to contend with, so let's hope they're more chill about the generation wars than their predecessors. And as of 2025, an even newer generation is starting: Generation Beta. Hopefully, the fighting will have died down.


This article originally appeared five years ago.

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Health

This woman's powerful 'before and after' photos crush myths about body positivity

"Body positivity is about saying that you are more than a body and your self-worth is not reliant on your beauty."

@scarrednotscared/Instagram

Michelle Elman, a body positivity coach, helps people who are struggling to find confidence in their own skin. After persevering through numerous medical conditions and surgeries in her own life, Elman realized a few years ago that body positivity wasn't just about size or weight.

Things like scars, birthmarks, and anything else that makes us feel different of self-conscious have to be a part of the conversation, and she tries to make the movement accessible to everyone. Sharing her own journey has been one of her most effective teaching tools.

In May, she shared a post on Instagram of herself trying on a dress she bought five years ago in order to prove a powerful point.

In the first photo, from 2012 — when she was a size 12, she says — she's wearing a size 14 dress. In the new photo, she's wearing the same dress, though she says she normally wears a size 20.

The dress still fit.

"NUMBERS DON'T MEAN ANYTHING," she wrote in the post. "So are you really going to let a change [in] dress size dictate your day? Are you really going to let an increase in a number affect your mood?"

"A higher dress size doesn't mean: — you are less beautiful — you are less worthy — you are less lovable — you are a worse human — you are a bad person — you are a different person AND it doesn't even mean you have a bigger body."

The viral photo inspired thousands of people. While a huge majority of the comments were positive, there was still something bugging Elman about the response.

Not everyone was getting the right message.

"Since the creation of this account, I have always been told I'm beautiful 'for my size' and I never wanted to talk about it because I thought I was being pedantic but eventually decided to speak my mind about it," she says in an email.

She decided to create a follow-up post to set a few things straight about what body positivity really means.

In the second post, she took a different approach to the "before and after" shots we see so often on Instagram. People loved it.

In the caption, Elman addresses a couple of things well-meaning people got wrong about the message she was trying to spread. Some commenters said she looked "skinnier" in the 2017 photo which, though meant as a compliment, just reinforces that being skinny is somehow better.

Others said she wasn't fat enough, to which Elman could only scoff.

"If people tell you they are a certain size, believe them," she wrote.

"People think that body positivity is about trying to convince people that bigger bodies are attractive, either physically or sexually," she says.

But that's totally missing the point of what her work is all about.

"If you are still relating your love for your body to society's perception of beauty," she says, "then you are still reliant on someone else's opinion. Body positivity is about saying that you are more than a body and your self-worth is not reliant on your beauty."

Her second post is currently sitting at over 26,500 likes on Instagram — a clear sign that this is a message many of us desperately needed to hear.


This article originally appeared seven years ago.



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Mellow dude shares the life hacks he didn't learn until his 30s. Here are 11 of the best.

via @Sidneyraz / TikTok

TikTok has become a great place for finding life hacks and one of the best follows is @Sidneyraz. His hook is that he shows people the "things I wish I knew before I was in my 30s." Most of his life hacks are simple, domestic tricks for cleaning the house or preparing food. But he also shares some financial advice and makes the personal admission that "not being hungover is better than being drunk."

That's a lesson that a lot of us wish we learned sooner. Like a lot of folks, Sidney is learning a lot of domestic skills in his third decade and that makes sense. That's the time when people begin to settle down with a significant other and pick up more domestic skills.

The good news is that he's not going through this life change alone. He wants to share all of it with you.

Here are 11 of his best life hacks.

Baking bacon is better than frying:

@sidneyraz

baking bacon is better than frying bacon #inmy30s #bacon


How to eat a flat chicken wing:

@sidneyraz

learned this on hot ones #inmy30s #chickenwings


A tooth-brushing trick:

@sidneyraz

30+ years of being wrong #inmy30s #oralhealth


How to stop a pot from boiling over:

@sidneyraz

it has helped many times #inmy30s #cookingtips


You can vacuum more than just your floor:

@sidneyraz

vacuuming more than just floors #inmy30s #vaccum


Did you know your dishwasher has a filter?

@sidneyraz

cleaning the dishes robot is a thing #inmy30s #dishwasher


The weatherman isn't saying what you think he's saying:

@sidneyraz

but what is the forecasted area?? #weatherreport #inmy30s


How to fill a cooler:

@sidneyraz

have a great summer y’all #inmy30s #summervibes2021


The secret behind Chinese food containers:

@sidneyraz

first time trying this #chinesefood #takeout #tipsandtricks


Hire movers:

@sidneyraz

your body will thank you #inmy30s #movingday


Not being hungover is better than being drunk:

@sidneyraz

goodbye youth. #inmy30s


This article originally appeared four years ago.

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