upworthy
Badge
Lawyers' Committee
Lawyers' Committee for Civil Rights
More

As a parent of a kid with autism, this is what I have to lose if Trump becomes president.

Just a few short years ago, I was sitting in the family room with my husband, entertained by Donald Trump’s aloof presence in the boardroom.

We were laughing over the crazy antics of the contestants on his television show, "The Apprentice."

Now it’s 2016, and Donald Trump is running for president of the United States of America. And I’m not laughing now.

Photo by Sarah Rice/Getty Images.

In fact, I’m terrified. I’m terrified that Trump — an ableist, a man who openly and publicly discriminates against people with disabilities (or the perception of disability) — is potentially weeks away from holding the highest office in the land.

Now, Trump is laughing.

He was laughing as he openly mocked Serge Kovaleski. Kovaleski is a New York Times reporter who was born with arthrogryposis, a physical disability which noticeably impairs the joints in his body. "The poor guy, you ought to see this guy," Trump boomed over the adoring faces in the crowd.

Carried by the rising fire in his words, the people in the audience were swept up in the message. They laughed, too.

As a mother of a disabled child, I watched this on television in my living room. And I cried.

I wrung my hands in fear, questioning how this man and his supporters could possibly find any compassion for my son. My son has severe autism, and at almost 13 years old, he can barely speak. He often makes strange sounds and delivers odd jolting gestures at awkward moments. He is smart and sweet, complicated and mysterious.

Image via iStock.

I watched in paralyzing fear as Trump honed his relationship with radio host Michael Savage.

He has delivered one troubling, disturbing message on Savage’s show after another. Savage, in turn, has made a bid to be Trump’s head of the National Institute of Health. This is a man who, in 2008, claimed that "nearly every child with autism is a brat who hasn’t been told to cut the act out."

I watched in horror as Trump contributed to the dangerous anti-vaccine movement.

He tweets destructive messages that strengthen the already dangerous fear of autism in this country. "Healthy young child goes to doctor, gets pumped with massive shot of many vaccines, doesn’t feel good and changes—AUTISM. Many such cases!" he disjointedly tweeted in 2014.

As a mother of a disabled child, I know Trump in the White House means four years of few real solutions for my son, and that is terrifying.

It likely means no empathy for the plight of families contending with autism in this country. It likely means no support but lots of fear.

If Trump wins this election, he will undoubtedly continue to spread misinformation about autism and developmental disabilities. He cares much more about being right than he does about the truth. And so as Trump’s version of how autism is caused permeates society, I fear we will have a nation of under-immunized children.

Image via iStock.

I lie awake at night in fear, wondering if a Trump administration will again take us back to the days when even talking about my son’s disability felt like a punishable offense.

Those were days when mentioning "autism" as an insurance code was enough to have the doctor’s visit immediately rejected by our insurer.

If Donald Trump becomes president, I believe my family has so much to lose. And I’m scared.

Now, as a family, we have made peace with autism. My son is part of autism, and autism is a part of him. I do not think we would change it — it’s been part of us so long.  

But I'm worried because you can tell a lot about a person by how they treat those who need help: the temporarily infirm, the disabled and the elderly, the sick and the poor. Those who have a path harder to walk than most. It’s an idea that goes beyond Republican and Democrat and floats in the soft space of humanity: taking care of those people in our country that cannot, through no fault of their own, care for themselves.

As Trump laughs at disabled reporters, mocks a deaf actress, and questions essential foundations of national health, I worry about the future — my future, my son’s future, your future. Trump's lack of empathy is what truly makes me afraid.

I worry that if Trump is our president, there will be a dangerous shift in tolerance toward children and adults like my son.

If the president of the United States makes fun of disabled persons, who will stop the children on the playground? Will my son be the victim of taunts and harassment from kids or even grown adults who are just modeling the behavior of the most powerful man in the country?

I can’t vote for the school-yard bully. So, world, I have a simple request: Think about your own children. And if you can, think about mine.

Electing Donald Trump will speak dangerous loud volumes — far more than a parent’s words could ever say. That kind of president is not one I want.

Movies

Julie Andrews said she literally could "feel the evil" when visiting the Von Trapp house

The story behind the movie might be more interesting than the movie itself.

Image via Wikicommons

Julie Andrews in The Sound of Music

Sometimes the story behind the movie is more interesting than the story in the movie.

In her autobiography, Home Work, Julie Andrews shared some of her experiences filming The Sound of Music. Andrews spoke with BuzzFeed News about her book, revealing her thoughts on the actual von Trapp family house. The movie musical, which is based on a section of the real-life Maria von Trapp's book, The Story of the Trapp Family Singers, was shot in a Hollywood studio.

The classic scene of Julie Andrews spinning in a meadow was shot in Bavaria, and the exteriors of the von Trapp house were filmed at a different house entirely.


- YouTubewww.youtube.com


Andrews did visit the von Trapp house in Salzburg, Austria later on in her life.

"It wasn't until much later that I happened to visit the real villa where they actually lived," she told BuzzFeed News. During her visit, Andrews said she could "feel the evil that once permeated those walls." The evil Andrews refers to is, of course, the Nazis. "Because after they fled the country, which they had to do, as in the film, [Heinrich] Himmler took over that villa, and the atrocities there were just terrible," she continued.

The story behind the von Trapp house is much darker than what's touched on in the splashy Hollywood musical. The actual von Trapp family lived in the house from 1923 until they fled Austria in 1938. In 1938, the Nazis annexed Austria, making life hard for the singing family. Georg von Trapp refused to fly the Nazi flag on his house, and declined a request to sing at Hilter's birthday party. There was fear their neighbors would spy on them and their children would become brainwashed by Nazi politics. Even though the family was offered fame, they decided to stay true to their principals and leave Austria.

Julie Andrews, The Sound of Music, musicals, Germany, World War 2, Nazi Germany, Von TrappChristopher Plummer and Julie Andrews on location in Salzburg, 1964upload.wikimedia.org

Not one year later, the house was occupied by Nazis. Heinrich Himmler used the house as his summer residence until 1945.

Himmler was the second most powerful man of the Third Reich. Himmler set up and ran the Nazi concentration camps. The house was surrounded by armed guards and barbed wires. A barracks for the SS was built in the garden. Himmler also built the white wall around the house using slave labor. After the wall was completed, he had those who constructed the wall shot. Very monstrous.

Now, the von Trapp house is a more peaceful place. In 1947, the property was purchased from the von Trapp family by the Missionaries of the Precious Blood. In 2008, it opened to the public as a hotel.


- YouTubewww.youtube.com

While the house has a heavy history, the previous residents of the property took satisfaction in knowing the von Trapps resisted the Nazi party. "What Himmler did here is a heavy weight on the house," Precious Blood Fr. Andreas Hasenburger, the rector of the Kolleg St. Josef, told the National Catholic Reporter. "But we are also proud to live in the von Trapp house, the house of the man who said no to the Führer."

It takes a lot of guts to stand up for what you believe in, especially when you're pressured to forfeit your integrity. Knowing that the family gave up their life to stay true to their principals makes The Sound of Music so much better.

This article originally appeared five years ago.

From Your Site Articles
Pop Culture

Brit living in the US shares the 8 American sayings she loves to hear folks say

It started a wholesome chain reaction of cultural appreciation.

Photo credit: Canva

Two women having a conversation at a coffee shop.

One of the coolest things about living in a world with a variety of cultures is that it can help you have newfound appreciation for things in your everyday life that might otherwise be taken for granted. Your daily breakfast, for example, can transform into the most novel of cuisines when you see it through the eyes of someone who’s never even heard of it.

Similarly, certain everyday American sayings and idioms will seem like fun, exotic phrases to fresh ears. Recently, a British woman (@whisked.away.usa) who recently began living in Michigan shared a few of her personal favorites, and odds are many of these would have never been on your radar.

For starters, her "absolute favorite" is “good job.” Honestly, who among you would have ever thought that was anything USA-centric? Although when you take our hustle culture into consideration, perhaps it is pretty fitting.

Also included in her list: “you’re all set” (again, Americans are big on work lingo), “y’all” (of course), “I’ve got to get a hold of them,” (versus “I’ve gotta get in touch”), “liquor” (because of its “old worldliness”), “stove” (she says “cooker”), “huh” (when we find something interesting), and “have a good one” (cause "it's kinda nice”).

@whisked.away.usa It sounds weird to hear British people now lol 🇬🇧 🇺🇲 #britlivinginamerica #livinginamerica #livingintheusa🇺🇸 #british #englishgirlinamerica #american #americanaccent #movedabroad #britlivingusa #britishinamerica #americandream ♬ original sound - 🇬🇧 Whisked Away USA 🇺🇲


Honestly, how cute are these? And perhaps even better, @whisked.away.usa’s viral video inspired a whole slew of equally lovely appreciation for brit slang.

“I like when Brits say: gutted. I’ve started saying it.”

“I love when you all say ‘brilliant’ like when something’s really good. That’s brilliant!”

“I love when Brits says ‘I’m going on holiday’ instead of ‘I’m going on vacation,’”

“I like the Brit…’Hoover the floor.’”

“I love hearing Brits say ‘em’ instead of ‘um.’ I’m trying to start saying ‘em.’”

This top comment really seems to sum up what was so great about this exchange: “cross appreciation expands our world.”

There was also a fair amount of shared love for “huh,” and all it’s many various uses.

“I love ‘huh’ because it can also be the Midwest polite [version] of ‘that sounds super weird, but I won’t say it out loud.'"

“So many different ways to say ‘huh.’”

Since moving to the US, @whisked.away.usa has shared all kinds of fun cultural differences she’s noticed. For instance, did you know that British pancakes are made quite thin (think: crepes) and have a “squirt of lemon”?

@whisked.away.usa Happy Pancake Day 🥞 #🇬🇧vs🇺🇲 My American husband trying British pancakes for the first time! #britishinamerica #britlivingusa #englishgirlinamerica #livingintheusa🇺🇸 #britlivinginamerica #lifevlog #happilymarried #pancakeday #britishpancakes #pancakes #britishvsamerican #englishwifeamericanlife ♬ Nice and Easy - Louis Adrien

In the following video, @whisked.away.usa shares her amazement at the gaps in American public toilets, “drive-thru everything,” air conditioning in houses, certain OTC medications, and the abundance of American flags in certain places.

@whisked.away.usa I love different cultures, let's celebrate them!! 🩷 #iloveamerica #movedtoamerica #britinamerica #britishinamerica #britlivinginamerica #livingintheusa🇺🇸 #lifevlog #englishgirlinamerica #americanlife #americanculture ♬ original sound - 🇬🇧 Whisked Away USA 🇺🇲

No matter where you're from, it seems we can all agree that this type of content is the Internet at its best.

From Your Site Articles
community
Motherhood

A Patagonia employee breastfed her baby in a meeting. Her male VP's response was perfect.

"It’s no wonder that Patagonia has 100% retention of moms."

Holly Morissette/LinkedIn
When a Patagonia employee breastfed her baby in a meeting her male VP's response was a masterclass in workplace values

Years after first engineering it, Patagonia's approach to the "family-friendly workplace" is on a whole new level that still deserves our attention - and praise. Unfortunately, parents all over the U.S. are struggling with burnout, high costs, unreliable childcare, poor paid leave, and more — in short, they're hanging on by a thread. But it's extremely reassuring to know that there are still some companies that value parents in the workplace and are fighting hard to keep them happy.

The outdoor clothing and gear company has made a name for itself by putting its money where its mouth is. From creating backpacks out of 100% recycled materials to donating their $10 million tax cut to fight climate change to refusing to sell to clients who harm the environment, Patagonia leads by example. It's made them not only an admired brand when it comes to values and integrity, but a beloved one with its own customers, who are fiercely loyal.

That dedication to principle is clear in its policies for parents who work for them, as evidenced by a 2019 viral post from Holly Morisette, a recruiter at Patagonia.


patagonia, workplace, office, career, benefits, paid leave, parental leave, parentingPatagona has always done a great job taking care of its employeesYukiko Matsuoka/Flickr

Morissette's stunning story begins with bringing her baby into a meeting at the office and proceeding to breastfeed as the team around her continued to discuss ROI, KPIs, EBITDA, and all those other acronyms corporate office culture loves so much.

That's when a male colleague took note of what she was doing.

Morrissette described the incident later on LinkedIn:

While nursing my baby during a morning meeting the other day after a recent return from maternity leave, our VP (Dean Carter) turned to me and said...”There is no way to measure the ROI on that. But I know it’s huge.”

It got me thinking...with the immense gratitude that I have for on-site childcare at Patagonia comes a responsibility to share a “call to action”. A PSA to tout the extraordinary benefits that come along with not asking employees to make the gut wrenching decision to either leave their jobs or leave their babies. TO HAVE TO LEAVE THEIR JOBS OR LEAVE THEIR BABIES. That perhaps just one person will brave the subject with their employer (big or small) in the hopes that it gets the wheels turning to think differently about how to truly support working families.

That with a bit of creativity, and a whole lot of guts, companies can create a workplace where mothers aren’t hiding in broom closets pumping milk, but rather visiting their babies for large doses of love and serotonin before returning to their work and kicking ass.

It’s no wonder that Patagonia has 100% retention of moms. Keeping them close to their babies keeps them engaged. And engaged mothers (and fathers!) get stuff done.

Thank you, Patagonia, for leading the way.

patagonia, kids, children, parenting, employee benefits, company culture, parental leave, paid leaveWhile nursing my baby during a morning meeting the other day after a…www.linkedin.com


The post gathered massive attention on social media where commenters were smitten, if a little jealous:

"I was never so confident to nurse during a meeting, but I love that you were. I especially love the response. No different than an adult eating a protein bar. No one should bat an eye."

"I am in absolute awe over your story and I thank you so much for sharing it. We go to work to support our families, but we stay with great companies because they support us as people, as humans, and they see us and appreciate us where we are at. Beautiful."

"Amazing! How I wish I had this with by kids. One of my "fun" memories was when I worked for an insurance company with no room available for nursing moms. I pumped 3 times a day in an empty office with no window shades nor a lock."

Just the first eight words of Morissette's post are extraordinary. "While nursing my baby during a morning meeting..."


the office, office, workplace, career, parenting, working moms, breastfeedingNot sure if Dwight Schrute would be as accomodating.Giphy

As if that's totally normal. As if everyone understands that working moms can be much more engaged and efficient in their jobs if they can feed their baby while they go over sales figures. As if the long-held belief that life and work must be completely separate is a construct that deserves to be challenged.

And then the comment from her male colleague about the ROI (Return on Investment) of breastfeeding—witty, considering the time and place, and yet so supportive.

On-site childcare so that parents don't have to choose between leaving their jobs or leaving their babies. Letting life integrate with work so that working families don't have to constantly feel torn in two different directions. Flexibility in meetings and schedules. Allowing for the natural rhythms and needs of breastfeeders. Making childcare as easy and accessible as possible so that employees can be more effective in their jobs.

All of this seems so profoundly logical, it's a wonder that more companies have not figured this out sooner. Clearly, it works. I mean, who has ever heard of a 100% retention rate for mothers?

But that's not all folks! Patagonia has extended its support for parents in recent years by allowing up to a staggering 16 paid weeks off. Parents and non-parents alike also enjoy top-notch healthcare, college tuition reimbursement, and so much more.


Patagonia founder discusses why the company's values are so importantwww.youtube.com

The company could almost be a case study in employee retention when it comes to parents. Experts say the things workers value the most in their career when they have children are paid time off, flexible scheduling, and help with childcare.

One more thing that makes a huge difference? A great manager who understands and supports the parent's needs. In this case, maybe one who doesn't flinch at a breastfeeding mother in the workplace.

Patagonia's got it goin' on. Let's hope more companies take their lead.

This article originally appeared on six years ago.

From Your Site Articles
breastfeeding
Mental Health

Men reveal what secrets they keep from their spouses, and the answers are surprising

A rare glimpse of what actually gets bottled up inside.

Photo by Donovan Grabowski on Unsplash

Two men chatting over a beer.

Men sometimes get labeled as more likely to keep secrets for selfish, manipulative purposes. But on the other end of the spectrum, men might keep certain things to themselves due to the pressure of gender norms: wanting to hide insecurities to appear strong for their families, hoping to shield their partners from hurt, not feeling safe to show emotion, and so on.

A Reddit user recently asked: “What, if anything, are you unable or unwilling to share fully openly and honestly about yourself with your spouse?” and the answers are a prime example of this.

These long kept secrets—some hilarious, others heartbreaking—are a rare, candid glimpse into exactly what many men feel compelled to keep bottled up inside.

Check them out:

“I keep the ceiling fan on at night because she farts in her sleep and it's so bad it wakes me up.” —JackassWhisperer

"When I go grocery shopping, i often buy a fresh rotisserie chicken thigh for myself, and wolf it down on a parkbench on my way home like a homeless caveman. I have no idea why, but it's my little me-time ritual." —Sternsson

"My self-doubt is something I conceal. I strive to be her rock and revealing my vulnerabilities seems counterproductive." -AdhesivenessGlass978

"When she asks to go out with her girlfriends or away on an overnight with some friends, she thinks I’m upset I’m not included. In reality, I’m praising the lord for a day or two alone." —Bobo_Baggins03x

man, relaxing, spouse, alone, alone timeAlone time.Giphy

"While I love my spouse deeply, I struggle to fully share my childhood traumas. The memories are painful and sometimes I feel like shielding her from that darkness." —Slight_Policy3133

"My child (18 months) is legitimately well behaved, compliant, and enjoyable to be around when she’s not in the home and it’s just he and I. When she’s around he’s combative, whiney, rude, and a little terror." —D00deitstyler

"Deep down, I really just want to be lazy. I don’t want to go to work, or cook that much, or change the bedding every week, or find part time income streams… Like, in my heart, I just want to lounge about, get a bit drunk and read books or watch youtube videos. I do as much as possible so that she’s comfortable and happy but don’t want to admit that I don’t really WANT to do anything useful." —LeutzschAKS

"The sheer amount of stress I'm under. I do share, but I can't articulate how bad it is." —Herald_of_dooom

“Sometimes the things she says to me in arguments break my heart.” —justVinnyZee

argument, couple fighting, spouse, heartbreak, secretHarsh words create distance. Image via Canva

"I served in Iraq and lost my leg. As a result I have severe PTSD…A couple of years after I got out I met my wife. She is an Iraqi Lady and has helped me through the best and worst times. She's given me beautiful children and a reason to carry on. However…her parents moved from Iraq before she was born. Every time I go to her parents house or there is a wedding on her side of the family I attend whilst suffering in silence. Sweaty palms, heart palpitations, shredding feeling where my leg was etc. It drove me to be extremely disrespectful by secretly carrying a hip flask with spirits and cocaine in as it just took the edge off and made it all manageable. Her parents are extremely religious and alcohol and drugs of any kind are heavily frowned upon and banned from the house. The worst is going to her parents house as so much of the decorations reminds me of the house I got dragged into after stepping on an IED. I keep this hidden because what can I do? Make her choose between family and me? Absolutely not. Prevent my kids from having grandparents and extended family? Absolutely not. My mental health and my foolish decisions at 16 are not going to be any form of potential wedge." —Greenlid_42

"That I sometimes buy $20 scratchers when I do the shopping and occasionally throw $60 at large Powerball/MegaMillions jackpots even tho I publicly say 'lotteries are a tax on people who are bad at math.' I do this because I like to dream of a day we don’t have to work and we can follow our passions." —wembley

"The fact that she wont let me put any of my hobby stuff (mostly miniatures and random knickknacks) in our shared spaces without it being in an approved location, meanwhile the entire house is her canvas for her aesthetic. Makes me feel really lonely and small sometimes and like she doesn't care. It's been a topic of conversation, she just doesn't get that delegating me a tiny shelf in her curio isn't the same as letting me actually decorate some." —Kimblethedwarf

“That she is bad at taking criticism, even about the most minor of things. And even saying so is itself a form of criticism she cannot handle. And this has very much hindered our ability to talk to each other.” —Aechzen

"I keep my regrets from her. I worry she’ll think less of me if she knew all my past mistakes." —Suspicious-Factor362

“Literally anything that isn't within the realm of her personal interests. Otherwise, she makes it clear that she's not really interested in what interests me. Sometimes I do, because I can't keep everything to myself forever, but it just feels like I'm a child bothering their parents talking about how cool their toys are.” —ChefBillyGoat

man, lonely, alone, communication, spouse, secretsFeeling lonely in a shared home. Image via Canva.

“I’m scared of not being able to provide a half decent life for her and my kids. Life’s getting so expensive and challenging.” —Arent_they_all

"Sometimes, the food she cooks isn't great. I will never tell her this because she goes out of her way to cook, and I'm not ungrateful. I can live with bad food that night over her getting upset." —CaptainAwesome0912

"That if I speak to her the same way she speaks to me she would probably spend her whole day in tears. It’s definitely a case of “familiarity breeds contempt” as she does not speak to any of her friends like this (who come over to help with furniture moving, for example), and occasionally it comes out with her family, but the unfettered torrent of complaints and abuse is reserved only for me, regardless of what I do. It’s like she looks for imperfections and mistakes just to point them out." —MusicusTitanicus

“How sad I am that my life isn't a grand adventure but a series of choices i made in order to be able to form and provide for a family…I know there's adventure and excitement to be had still, but I wanted to continue my family line. And dearly love my family. Anything available in that vein will come at cost to my wife and children. So I'm stuck playing rise through the ranks, build the better mouse trap and look good to the suites for another raise or step up the ladder. It's going well, but as it goes well it feels more hollow. I could become head honcho, or start my own enterprise and find massive success, it'd still all been to just provide. Collecting wealth is such a boring pursuit, I hate our society.” —BodyRevolutionary167

wealth, work, corporate, working, gaining wealth, statusBored Season 5 GIF by The OfficeGiphy

"I let the kids play Roblox beyond their allowed time." —chelhydra

"She's always in the way. If she's in the kitchen when I'm cooking, she's always standing in front of the next place I need to be. If I'm working outside, she's always in the next place I'm going to go. If I'm fixing something, she's always standing right in front of whatever I'm going to be working on next. If I'm trying to leave a room, she's always in the doorway. I realize she wants to spend time with me, but I really wish she'd just get out of the way when I'm doing something." —Lonecoon

"That when I’m not with her, I put ketchup on my hot dogs." —bipolarcyclops

The secrets shared here range from benign to heavy, silly to heartbreaking. Though it may be hard, studies do show that open, honest communication is vital to building a healthy relationship or marriage. In her 2021 TEDxTalk, award-winning communication strategist Sandy Gerber broke down how open, honest communication can lead to successful romantic relationships without secrets. Watch:

- YouTubewww.youtube.com


This article originally appeared last year.

From Your Site Articles
secrets
Parenting

Mom's adorable 1993 baby picture is a modern pediatrician's worst nightmare

Our parents were really doing their best with the information they had.

Canva Photos

Blanket, pillows, and toys in cribs used to be totally normal back in 1993.

I love learning about common parenting techniques from generations past. We've probably all heard some of the classics, like giving baby a tiny bit of alcohol to get him to sleep, or rubbing whiskey on sore gums to soothe a teething infant. (Upon reflection, it seems that a lot of parenting hacks back in the day boiled down to giving children liquor). These weren't hush-hush under the table tactics. Doctors frequently recommended these things to new parents. Now, of course, we're horrified at the thought and we know the significant risks of alcohol exposure both in the womb and out of it.

Crib set ups are similar. Decades ago, parents were hyper-worried about baby's limbs getting caught in the crib bars, so the solution was to line cribs with thick, soft bumpers. Inside the cribs, pillows and blankets kept baby comfortable and from rolling around too much. It made sense! At the time at least. But, wow, have times changed.

One mom is going viral for posting a fascinating side by side. Her as a baby in 1993, sleeping peacefully in a crib, versus her daughter in 2025.


babies, parenting, motherhood, fatherhood, pediatricians, newborn safety, SIDSThis was basically parenting in the 1960sGiphy

The comparison is definitely illuminating.

In 1993, there's millennial mom Alanna Clark, sleeping comfortably on her back in her pajamas. She's surrounded by a cocoon of comfort. The key thing to note is the fluffy crib bumpers to keep her from reaching through the bars. Bumpers were meant to add decoration and comfort to a baby's crib while also keeping them from getting injured by the bars. This was especially true back when drop-cribs, or cribs where one wall could drop down, were popular. The American Academy of Pediatrics officially began recommending parents never use crib bumpers in 2011 due to their being a suffocation risk highly associated with SIDS.

The photo of Clark's daughter from 2025 is striking. Her crib is completely empty! She's sleeping on her back with a fitted sheet on the mattress and a snugly-fitted sleepsack containing her legs. That's it. There are no bumpers, toys, pillows, or blankets according to the latest pediatrician guidelines.

As a bonus, Clark shared a picture of herself riding in a (rather flimsy looking) front-facing car seat while her daughter in 2025 rides in a rear-facing "tank," as she calls it, which fits current standards.

Clark's caption captured a beautiful sentiment about the "outdated" standards. Instead of judging her parents for dangerous choices, she understands that they were doing their absolute best with the information they had at the time:

"When I explained modern sleep practices to my dad, he explained to me that the bumpers were to keep me safe from breaking an arm or a leg. I’m glad that when my family talks about the 'new' way of doing things we focus on how much more information we have to keep babies safe. Anyways, enjoy these little snippets of me as a baby with my parents doing what they were told was best. I wonder what practices will be outdated when I’m a grandma one day"

See the fascinating photos here.


tiktok, babies, 1993, 2025 , parentingTikTok · Alanna | First Time Mom 🇨🇦www.tiktok.com

Clark's post went viral and commenters were so appreciative of how infant safety standards have improved. They were also grateful to previous generations for trying their best:

"yep, and hopefully our kids have even better info and technology when they raise their children."

"Doing their best back then, so we can keep doing better today!!"

"I love your take on this rather than bashing practices of the time which genuinely were what they thought was best"

"It's reassuring knowing that our kids will look at their baby pictures in the future like 'We're you trying to kill me?' and proceed to do differently, as will be best practice then"

"I was trying to explain to someone the other day that our kids are going to say they can’t believe our recommendations were legal it will have changed so much"

Others shared some of their favorite parenting methods from their own parents and grandparents. One commenter wrote that her grandma would put her babies in dresser drawers to keep them safe. Another said her grandpa "didn't believe" in car seats! Somehow, they both lived to tell the tale.

Are there things we're doing with our babies now that will one day be viewed as Hard Nos?


babies, parents, moms, dads, infants, newborns, safety, infant safety, parentingThis baby has nothing in his pack 'n play at all. Well done parents! Photo by Alex Bodini on Unsplash

Again, you have to remember that doctors, pediatricians, and fellow parents were all telling the older generations that this stuff was not just OK, but highly recommended. They really believed those death-trap crib bumpers were safe! You can't help but wonder what kinds of things parents today take for granted as safe, that our kids will look back on one day as reckless and dangerous when it's studied further.

"I'm 100% convinced that 'cry it out' will be the thing that future generations are appalled by," one commenter opined, referring to a controversial method of sleep training infants.

Another user joked that in a few decades, babies will sleep levitating in mid-air via magnets to avoid contact with potential hazards.

Me, I think it's likely that the next generation of parents will be appalled that they were ever allowed to watch cartoons or use a screen, as more research into screentime begins to take shape. I also wouldn't be surprised if pediatricians decide we can't be trusted to make our own baby food at home anymore. But these are just guesses. We won't really know until the science rolls in.

Overall, there's a powerful message here for parents and even those grandparents who might insist on being defensive about the older ways:

"What some grandparents don’t understand is that following modern standards is NOT a condemnation of their parenting," one commenter wrote. "They did what was best according to contemporary standards too." That's all any of us can do.

From Your Site Articles
parenting
Trending Stories