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The horrifying side to the 'mail-order bride' industry — some men aren't exactly looking for love.

These marriages aren't always a bad thing, but when they are, they really are.

Oksana thought she'd met a kind man when Carl came to see her in the Ukraine.

But by her third month with him in America on a fiancee visa, Oksana Makarova was starting to suspect she'd made a big mistake. He'd begun tracking her ovulation during those first months she'd moved to be with him. He was hell-bent on impregnating her as soon as possible. He dyed her toddler son's blond hair black without her consent. He wouldn't give her a key to the house, reminding her when she asked for one that she had no one to visit and no reason to leave the house.

"Oksana, I thought you'd be obedient. This is the impression you gave me in Ukraine."

Image via iStock.

That's the line he would break out whenever he needed to put her back into her place. And as you can guess, he soon turned violent. Luckily, Oksana's story (told originally and in its entirety in Marie Claire) ended fairly well. She and her children safely moved out on their own, citizenships attained, and with primary custody given to Oksana. But it's not always the case for women who suffer the worst outcomes as "mail-order brides," as they're commonly (if somewhat insultingly) referred to.

The international marriage industry may inadvertently produce circumstances that can position a person as an ideal victim.

As mentioned in the first installment in this look at the international marriage industry, there are some very legitimate, understandable, and downright sweet love stories that can emerge from the practice. But what happens when a disturbed kind of man, put off by what he perceives as independent or hard-to-get women in America, turns to services where he thinks he can procure and isolate a "subservient" woman to yield to his more harmful tendencies?

Before heading to mixers where men assemble with the bride-finding company, hopeful women spend time beautifying. GIF from "Love Translated."

First, let's consider the motivations involved in how men and women meet in these kinds of matchmaking services. In some cases, the women, like Ekaterina from the first installment, can be already in a good place in life and generally happy; they're just seeking love, travel, and adventure. But sometimes, like in Oksana Makarova's case, there are women drawn to the matchmaking services because of a desperate need to provide for themselves and their children or to escape a dire situation in their home country.

That's the first indicator that major power imbalances between the two people are afoot.

That uneven distribution of power comes into focus again when the men and women meet at mixers planned by the matchmaking agencies. The agency Oksana used had the women line up to be evaluated and maybe chosen for an interview by a man.

The courtship, if it proceeds, may continue for awhile with the "bride" communicating long distance from her home country, or she and her suitor may apply for a fiancee visa so that she can go to America. Often, once she is in America, she is quite dependent on a guy she may not know very well and who may very well have been spurred to seek her out in the first place because of misogynistic tendencies.

This is the second obvious marker of that aforementioned power imbalance. There are language barriers, deportation worries, and financial concerns that all serve to place an international bride-to-be in a pretty precarious position.

Furthermore, in a place far away from home, if she's been successfully isolated by her new fiance or husband, it's very difficult for her family and friends abroad to verify her well-being or to report her missing in a worst-case scenario.

These situations have all the precursors to produce the perfect victims for the kind of person who looks to victimize — and like all of us, it's really just a roll of the dice if you will find yourself matched and then entangled with such a person.

There is the story of Gary Swierski, a California man who repeatedly reeled in foreign women through pen pal services and dated immigrants already living in America, serially and savagely abusing one after the other. He was finally turned in by his daughter, whom he'd forced to help dispose of the body of his second wife, Reina Swierski, after he killed her. It caused investigators to reopen the case of a former girlfriend of his who suspiciously drowned during a night out with him more than a decade earlier.

L: Gary Swierski. R: Reina Swierski, Gary's second wife and murder victim. Image from Sunnyvale Police Department/public domain.

After a string of disturbingly similar murder cases involving marriages started through international marriage brokers, the United States passed the International Marriage Broker Regulation Act (IMBRA) in 2005. It stipulates that background checks must be run on U.S. citizens before they communicate through the services to potential women. But the law is easy to circumvent — all the company has to do is base itself outside the United States to not have to comply.

The gray area between international marriages and human trafficking gets murky sometimes.

National Organization for Women's Sonia Ossorio told Bloomberg in 2011, "The mail-order bride industry is a softer version of human trafficking."

"You take a beautiful woman from the Czech Republic and you bring her into your home, she does all your cooking and cleaning and ironing. At the end of the day, the [wife's] service is free."

And national experts agreed. In 2004, before Congress passed IMBRA, John R. Miller (then-director of the State Department's Office to Monitor and Combat Trafficking in Persons) clearly connected the dots between human trafficking and international marriage practices:

"I want to focus, if I can, on the worldwide perspective here. When you look at the slavery issue, we now have reason to believe that 80 percent of the millions that are in slavery, internal or external traffic victims, 80 percent are women and 50 percent are children. The two biggest categories are sex slavery and probably domestic servitude. I think these are two of the categories of slavery that you frequently have... What do we know about trafficked victims in general? Well, there are two or three characteristics. There is the vulnerability of the victims. ... There is the deception, the key tool of the traffickers, and often there is government complicity and corruption. Well, if you look at marriage brokering, you have these features, particularly the first two features, the vulnerability of the women and the deception involved. These are features that we have to deal with."

Pair that testimony with this excerpt and quote from an international marriage agency founder featured in Bloomberg, and the connection really begins to emerge:

"For some companies, such submissiveness is a selling point. Hand-In-Hand's website trumpets the fact that its females are 'unspoiled by feminism.' Company founder Weiner argues this form of chauvinism — like the mail-order bride business itself — is economically motivated. 'You take a beautiful woman from the Czech Republic and you bring her into your home, she does all your cooking and cleaning and ironing,' he says. 'At the end of the day, the service is free.' Hand-In-Hand estimates the potential savings of a homemaking wife at $150 per week."

And then there are the times would-be brides (and potentially their children) are duped into sex slavery. John R. Miller told of one such case in his 2004 deposition to Congress regarding IMBRA.

"Pou was 17 when a man came to her village and arranged through her sister to marry her. Shortly after the marriage, the man took Pou to a fishing village and sold her to a brothel. After years of abuse and torment, Pou was released by the brothel. Today her body is ravaged by disease, and this woman in her 20s looks decades older than her real age. Yet she wants her story told."

Clearly, there is a very real concern about the welfare of women who participate in international marriage arrangements.

And to be fair, there are also cases reported of the seemingly perfect, caring woman bilking lonely bachelors out of significant money and property and then disappearing. But since that's money, and not physical safety, again the risk-to-reward ratios are highly skewed between them.

Even in the less egregious, non-abusive situations, there is a lot to explore in the dynamics of modern society that cause some men to look to a more transactional, surefire method of selecting a life partner. Some bride-seekers are decent guys with extenuating circumstances that necessitate going outside of traditional dating. But...

Some men really just don't like how feminism is changing their world and all it entails for them.

As noted previously, some men are seriously averse to feminism and the shifting paradigm (or at least the effort to shift paradigms) to more equitable relationships.

To men who may struggle with that shift, the cultural dissonance manifests itself in various ways. There are countless OKCupid and Tinder horror stories from women who "swiped right" on a guy's profile only to have him go from seemingly nice to combative and bitter in minutes, all because she didn't display the desired level of enthusiasm at his advances.

Photo by Paul Zinken/picture-alliance/dpa/AP Images.

There are also "pickup artist" (PUA) forums, where men who don't hold with that "feminism crap" convene and share tips for getting women to respond to them.


The prevailing attitude in such virtual meeting places is that women are all similar enough, and universal reactions can be provoked from them if only you employ the right tactics, as if you're entering code into a computer. They even organize in-person events, where they hire marketers to recruit young women to attend, often under the guise that it's a free networking event. All the while, it's really a training ground for men who've paid good money to try out their newly acquired "skills" in manipulating women, with an experienced "guru" to encourage them in the wings. You just have to learn the right combination of psychological buttons to push on a woman to get them to comply with your wishes! It's a sadly reductionist coping outlet for the subsection of men who seem to struggle with one concept: Women are human beings who are complex and don't come with a guarantee — they're not vending machines and love isn't transactional.

None of this even touches yet on the way that toxic and twisted misconception of masculinity manifests when the Elliot Rodgers of the world shoot innocent people because girls reject them, and jilted high schoolers stab girls for saying no to being their prom date.

It's easy to see how a man who hasn't been taught that interacting with women is like interacting with any other human could progress through the various stages of frustration at his ever-calcifying ineptitude. And he might be attracted to a transactional kind of arrangement with a woman he perceives as powerless — his path of least resistance.

A few thousand dollars is easier to pull together than untangling decades of one's societal misogynistic programming, after all.

There's no easy answer to whether the international marriage industry is a net positive or a net negative.


In the end, an online tool or agency of any kind is only as good as the people using it and the safeguards it implements to protect regular users from the worst. In a world where hatred toward women isn't always actively discouraged, and companies don't always play by the rules, it can be a high-risk gamble to look for a love connection across the world in a place where one has no support system.

For some, like Ekaterina and Josh, it pays off and produces a beautiful new life together. But when enough people get unlucky matches with the worst outcomes, we have to evaluate where things went so devastatingly wrong and how it can be changed for the better.


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Popular

Is safe and stable housing the key to our health and wellbeing? This docuseries says yes (and has the footage to prove it).

A moving docuseries explores housing, equity, and personal health and well-being through the lens of three unforgettable stories.

Photo by Ryder Haske, People's Television, Inc.

Four Bands Community Fund helped Tammy Granados (pictured here) navigate systemic barriers that are common among Native homebuyers.

When you think of a home, what comes to mind? For many, it’s the classic vision of a house—four walls, some doors, a roof. But research has shown that home ownership is so much more than just a physical structure. Instead, it’s an opportunity for families to have stability, a way to build and pass down wealth to future generations, and a foundation for a healthy life.


In a three-part docuseries from the Robert Wood Johnson Foundation (RWJF), filmmakers explore the systemic barriers that keep safe and accessible housing out of reach for many Americans, such as racial discrimination, access to credit, and poverty. The docuseries, From Hope to Home, follows the story of three families affected by these barriers and shows how, with the help of community organizations, they are able to break free from these barriers and access safe housing—something RWJF believes is essential for health and wellbeing.

Four Bands Community Fund helped Tammy Granados (pictured here) navigate systemic barriers that are common among Native homebuyers.

Photo by Ryder Haske, People's Television, Inc.

In the first part of the docuseries, entitled “What We Came Here For,” viewers meet Tammy Granados, a young mother of four children, who experienced housing insecurity when the rent was raised on her family’s two-bedroom apartment.

Granados reached out to Four Bands Community Fund, a community development financial institution (CDFI) that helps create a path to homeownership for underserved communities and individuals—something that is particularly complicated for Native Americans.

“Most of the issues our homeowners face have to do with barriers set up around the land that we have no control over, that were set up through treaties with the US Government,” says Lakota Vogel, executive director of Four Bands Community Fund. Native communities, for instance, work through the Bureau of Indian Affairs to buy and sell tribal land rather than a traditional realtor, which can make home ownership seem even more out of reach.

“Who do you call when you want to buy a house?” says Vogel, of the typical home buying process for Native communities. “We don’t have realtor companies.”

These kinds of structural barriers, Vogel explains, put a significant strain on the health of Native communities.

“It’s like a chronic stress that’s overtop all of us, and our populations experience these unprecedented health disparities,” she says. “We adopt this scarcity mindset and our bodies sort of respond by increasing a stress hormone called cortisol. Having a home decreases that stress response.”

Four Bands not only understands these particular barriers and the harm they cause—they’re also able to help Native communities break through them.

“The first thing we do within a Native American reservation is sort of demystify the process,” Vogel says in a panel discussion led by RWJF, in partnership with Upworthy. “We look at the land site with the community member and talk them through every step of the process.” Four Bands then matches them with any available capital that will help them purchase the home.

Through a partnership with Four Bands, Granados was able to move her children into safe, secure, and affordable housing where they’re able to thrive.

“Becoming a homeowner gave me freedom to show my kids that you don’t just have to work to survive,” says Granados in the film. “You can work to thrive, you can work to live, you can work to grow your spirit, you can work doing something you enjoy. This is what your spirit came to Earth for.”

“What We Came Here For” is part one of From Hope to Home, a three-part docuseries from the Robert Wood Johnson Foundation and Emmy®-nominated creative studio People’s Television. It is available to stream here.

Shala Staple and her daughter outside their home in New Jersey. Staple was able to secure an affordable house in a safe neighborhood thanks to a 1975 New Jersey Supreme Court ruling that mandated each municipality set aside housing for lower-income homebuyers.

Photo by Ryder Haske, People's Television, Inc.

“Moving Day,” the second part of the docuseries, shines a light on discriminatory housing practices in New Jersey, one of the most diverse areas in the nation—and also one of the most segregated.

“People want to be able to control where other people, especially people of color, live,” says Adam Gordon in the film, who works as the Executive Director of the Fair Share Housing Center. “The KKK didn’t want black residents to be in the same town, and yet these are still the same [rules] we use to govern our communities today,” he explains.

These discriminatory practices, known as “exclusionary zoning,” kicked off years of activism that eventually led to the New Jersey Supreme Court’s watershed Mount Laurel ruling in 1975. The ruling found that exclusionary zoning practices were unconstitutional, and declared that every town in New Jersey must provide their “fair share” of each region’s affordable housing. Organizations like the Fair Share Housing Center help enforce these housing laws and compel municipalities across New Jersey to set aside housing units for lower-income families.

Because of that ruling, more than 400,000 New Jersey citizens—like Shala Staple, who is featured in the film—can now access secure housing in neighborhoods that would otherwise be out of reach.

“Affordable housing made me feel able to provide for my children,” Staple says. “I’m just really excited for their futures.”

However, “Moving Day” shows that there is still more work to be done, as several New Jersey communities continue to push back against affordable housing mandates. Fair Share Housing Center and other advocacy groups will continue to fight to ensure every community is accessible to New Jerseyans.

“No community should be closed to anyone,” says Gordan in the post-screening panel discussion. “Every community has to do its fair share of [providing] affordable housing, and every town, even the wealthiest ones, have to be part of the solution.”

“Moving Day” is part two of From Hope to Home, a three-part docuseries from the Robert Wood Johnson Foundation and Emmy®-nominated creative studio People’s Television. It will be available to stream here starting April 15.

Ashleigh Bowman (pictured here with her three children) was able to secure her home with help from a community land trust, which allows her to build wealth while keeping her home affordable long-term.

Photo by Ryder Haske, People's Television, Inc.

Finally, in “Roses and Thorns,” director Milena Mikael-Debass shows viewers how community land trusts, or CLTs, can improve access to housing in Lynchburg, VA.

A CLT, the film explains, is a regionally-based nonprofit organization that acquires land, holds it in a trust, and then leases out the land for home-building, farming, and more. CLTs were first created in 1969 as a response to segregation under Jim Crow laws, allowing black farmers to gain equal access to farmland and black families to secure affordable housing. These trusts continue to help people like Ashleigh Bowman, a single mom of three kids, participate in home ownership when they normally would not be able to access it. Home ownership through CLTs also help marginalized communities build generational wealth.

“If something happens to me, I will be able to pass on this home to my children,” says Bowman in the film, who purchased her house through a community land trust after a life-altering event. “[They will] be able to afford it because the community land trust guarantees that this land will not be volatile with the market.”

Organizations like Grounded Solutions Network are looking to scale this type of shared equity home ownership model across the country, says Alex Cabral, Senior Principal of Innovative Finance at Grounded Solutions Network.

To do so, Grounded Solutions Network partners with other organizations and provides support like policy advocacy, education, research, and housing technology solutions to help them implement these models all over the U.S. Their latest goal is to produce one million affordable houses within the next ten years, acquiring corporate-owned rental homes and transitioning them into affordable housing opportunities across the US. This will help ensure a safer, more secure, and healthier country.

“Everyone has the right to a safe and secure home,” Cabral says. “And those who seek to be homeowners deserve that opportunity.”

“Roses and Thorns,” is part three of From Hope to Home, a three-part docuseries from the Robert Wood Johnson Foundation and Emmy®-nominated creative studio People’s Television. It will be available to stream here starting April 22.

Conservation

A juice company dumped orange peels in a national park. This is what it looks like today.

12,000 tons of food waste and 28 years later, this forest looks totally different.

Image via Dan Jansen

A before and after view of the experiment

In 1997, ecologists Daniel Janzen and Winnie Hallwachs approached an orange juice company in Costa Rica with an off-the-wall idea. In exchange for donating a portion of unspoiled, forested land to the Área de Conservación Guanacaste — a nature preserve in the country's northwest — the park would allow the company to dump its discarded orange peels and pulp, free of charge, in a heavily grazed, largely deforested area nearby.

One year later, one thousand trucks poured into the national park, offloading over 12,000 metric tons of sticky, mealy, orange compost onto the worn-out plot. The site was left untouched and largely unexamined for over a decade. A sign was placed to ensure future researchers could locate and study it.

16 years later, Janzen dispatched graduate student Timothy Treuer to look for the site where the food waste was dumped.

Treuer initially set out to locate the large placard that marked the plot — and failed.


natural wonders, nature, recycling, conservation, environment, oranges, orange peels, dumpsThe first deposit of orange peels in 1996.Photo by Dan Janzen.


"It's a huge sign, bright yellow lettering. We should have been able to see it," Treuer says. After wandering around for half an hour with no luck, he consulted Janzen, who gave him more detailed instructions on how to find the plot.

When he returned a week later and confirmed he was in the right place, Treuer was floored. Compared to the adjacent barren former pastureland, the site of the food waste deposit was "like night and day."


Environment, natural wonder, natural miracles, nature, oranges, planet, conservation The site of the orange peel deposit (L) and adjacent pastureland (R).Photo by Leland Werden.


"It was just hard to believe that the only difference between the two areas was a bunch of orange peels. They look like completely different ecosystems," he explains.

The area was so thick with vegetation he still could not find the sign.

Treuer and a team of researchers from Princeton University studied the site over the course of the following three years.

The results, published in the journal "Restoration Ecology," highlight just how completely the discarded fruit parts assisted the area's turnaround.

According to the Princeton School of International Public Affairs, the experiment resulted in a "176 percent increase in aboveground biomass — or the wood in the trees — within the 3-hectare area (7 acres) studied."

The ecologists measured various qualities of the site against an area of former pastureland immediately across the access road used to dump the orange peels two decades prior. Compared to the adjacent plot, which was dominated by a single species of tree, the site of the orange peel deposit featured two dozen species of vegetation, most thriving.


natural wonder, nature, environment, conservation, oranges, orange peelsLab technician Erik Schilling explores the newly overgrown orange peel plot.Photo by Tim Treuer.


In addition to greater biodiversity, richer soil, and a better-developed canopy, researchers discovered a tayra (a dog-sized weasel) and a giant fig tree three feet in diameter, on the plot.

"You could have had 20 people climbing in that tree at once and it would have supported the weight no problem," says Jon Choi, co-author of the paper, who conducted much of the soil analysis. "That thing was massive."

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

Recent evidence suggests that secondary tropical forests — those that grow after the original inhabitants are torn down — are essential to helping slow climate change.

In a 2016 study published in Nature, researchers found that such forests absorb and store atmospheric carbon at roughly 11 times the rate of old-growth forests.

Treuer believes better management of discarded produce — like orange peels — could be key to helping these forests regrow.

In many parts of the world, rates of deforestation are increasing dramatically, sapping local soil of much-needed nutrients and, with them, the ability of ecosystems to restore themselves.

Meanwhile, much of the world is awash in nutrient-rich food waste. In the United States, up to half of all produce in the United States is discarded. Most currently ends up in landfills.


natural wonder, nature, conservation, environment, planet, oranges, orange peelsThe site after a deposit of orange peels in 1998.Photo by Dan Janzen.


"We don't want companies to go out there will-nilly just dumping their waste all over the place, but if it's scientifically driven and restorationists are involved in addition to companies, this is something I think has really high potential," Treuer says.

The next step, he believes, is to examine whether other ecosystems — dry forests, cloud forests, tropical savannas — react the same way to similar deposits.

Two years after his initial survey, Treuer returned to once again try to locate the sign marking the site.

Since his first scouting mission in 2013, Treuer had visited the plot more than 15 times. Choi had visited more than 50. Neither had spotted the original sign.

In 2015, when Treuer, with the help of the paper's senior author, David Wilcove, and Princeton Professor Rob Pringle, finally found it under a thicket of vines, the scope of the area's transformation became truly clear.



natural wonder, nature, environment, environmental miracle, planet, oranges, orange peelsThe sign after clearing away the vines.Photo by Tim Treuer.


"It's a big honking sign," Choi emphasizes.

19 years of waiting with crossed fingers had buried it, thanks to two scientists, a flash of inspiration, and the rind of an unassuming fruit.

This article originally appeared eight years ago.

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Humor

Jack Black channels My Chemical Romance in hilarious 'Goth Kid on Vacation' sketch

Some parents can probably relate to this SNL scene more than they'd care to admit.

Saturday Night Live/Youtube

Jack Black channeling his inner Gerard Way from My Chemical Romance.

One can expect for Jack Black and Saturday Night Live to go hand in hand. After all, the dude has hosted on the long-running sketch show four times now, and his bombastic style of comedy only elevates the level of silliness other cast members commit to.

But for the April 5 episode, it seems like Black outdid himself from his epic musical monologue noting his nearly two decade gap between appearances, to his dating show character who was accidently-on-purpose dressed like Indiana Jones.

There were a lot of great moments and sketches, but the performance that seemed to really win viewers over was when he parodied My Chemical Romance‘s early 2000s hit “Welcome To The Black Parade” for a musical sketch aptly titled, “Goth Kid on Vacation.”

goth kid on vacation, jack black, jack black snl, jack black mcr, mcrNobody spoke to goth kids like My Chemical Romancemedia4.giphy.com

In the pre-recorded sketch, Ego Nwodim and Kenan Thomspon play a Jamaican reggae duo who sing about how they find joy with all the “struggle and pain” by laughing at, you guessed it, the goth kid on vacation.

Even before Black makes his appearance, Michael Longfellow plays an excellent goth/emo kid, dressed in all black and decidedly not having a good time on the beach as he applies sunscreen through his fishnet gloves.

But then Black joins in during the song’s climax, singing updated lyrics like “When I was a young boy, my parents took me down to Jamaica for my high school spring break.”

Watch:

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

The video even got the seal of approval from actual goth kids, who applauded the accuracy.

“As a Black-African emo-goth kid in my teens and an Elder Emo now, I screamed at the The Black Parade reference. Goosebumps! It's still my anthem, and Jack Black giving me 2000s Gerard Way/Tenacious D energy is something I didn't know I needed. The Black Parade will CARRY OOON~"

“Me being a goth person, this is one of the best and funniest snl skits I've ever seen ”

“I am an emo kid freshly departed from a vacation this is way too good ”

"Elder goth here. I have a photo of myself and my teenagers on the beach, wearing our goth clothes, labeled' Goth Day at the Beach'! This SNL skit was fun and true! Still not a phase! Love the MCR reference, too!"

By the way, if listening to this got you jonesing for even more MCR, the band is actually embarking on a "Long Live: The Black Parade" North American stadium tour in 2025, starting in Seattle on July 11 and concluding in Tampa on September 13, performing their 2006 album The Black Parade in full. So there’s something for our dark, twisted hearts to get excited about.

Previously, Black made another equally awesome guest appearance, meeting Love on the Spectrum’s Tanner Smith on the Kelly Clarkson Show. The Kung Fu Panda star had previously sent Tanner a video message to tell him to “keep up the great work” and promised that they’d meet in person “someday soon.”

- YouTubewww.youtube.com

There you have it folks. Jack Black is not only funny, but true to his word. No wonder he is so well-liked.

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Wellness

12 unforgettable side-by-side photos of people over 100-years-old with their younger selves

A truly beautiful reminder of how delightful aging can be.

via Jan Langer/Aktualne

Jan Langer's incredible photos are timeless.

Czech photographer Jan Langer's portrait series "Faces of Century" shows them in a different light: as human beings aged by years of experience, but at their deepest level, unchanged by the passing of time. In the series, Langer juxtaposes his portraits with another portrait of the subject from decades earlier. He recreates the original pose and lighting as closely as he can — he wants us to see them not just as they are now, but how they have and haven't changed over time. That is the key to the series.

These are the rare faces of people who have lived through two world wars, a cavalcade of regimes, and the rush of advancements in modern life. These photos, and the stories of the lives lived by the people in them, show not only the beauty of aging, but how even as we age, we still remain essentially ourselves.


All photos by Jan Langer.


1. Prokop Vejdělek, at age 22 and 101


aging, photos, older people with their younger selves, aging process, 100 years oldProkop Vejdělek, at age 22 and 101via Jan Langer/Aktualne

Vejdělek is a former metallurgical engineer who will never forget the taste of warm fresh goat's milk.


2. Bedřiška Köhlerová, at age 26 and 103



via Jan Langer/Aktualne

Originally born in Merano, Italy, Köhlerová wishes to visit Italy one more time.


3. Ludvík Chybík, at age 20 and 102


via Jan Langer/Aktualne

Chybík is a former postal carrier and says he will never forget the route he worked every day.


4. Vincenc Jetelina, at age 30 and 105


via Jan Langer/Aktualne

Jetelina spent eight years in prison after World War II. Now, he just wants to live the rest of his life in peace.


5. Antonín Kovář, at age 25 and 102


via Jan Langer/Aktualne

Kovář is a former musician whose daughter comes to visit him every day. He wishes to play the clarinet once more.


6. Anna Vašinová, at age 22 and 102


via Jan Langer/Aktualne

Vašinová will always remember the day her husband was taken away by the Nazis. She wishes to be reunited with him after death.

7. Stanislav Spáčil, at age 17 and 102


via Jan Langer/Aktualne

Spáčil was an electrical engineer throughout his life and thinks that it's too early in his life to think about the past.


8. Anna Pochobradská, at age 30 and 100

via Jan Langer/Aktualne

Pochobradská was a farmer. She now lives a quiet life and is thankful that her daughter visits her every weekend.


9. Antonín Baldrman, at age 17 and 101


via Jan Langer/Aktualne

Baldrman was a clerk early in life and keeps up with current events by reading the newspaper.


10. Marie Burešová, at age 23 and 101


via Jan Langer/Aktualne

Burešová loves talking to her family and wishes to have them all together again.


11. Vlasta Čížková, at age 23 and 101


aging, photos, older people with their younger selves, aging process, 100 years oldvia Jan Langer/Aktualne

Čížková cooked in the dining room at the airport in the small village of Vodochody. She'll never forget reciting her own poetry at wedding ceremonies.


12. Ludmila Vysloužilová, at age 23 and 101


aging, photos, older people with their younger selves, aging process, 100 years oldvia Jan Langer/Aktualne

Vysloužilová stays active every day by chopping wood, shoveling snow, and doing work around her house.


The photographer Langer was initially inspired to document the lives of elderly people because of what he saw as the media's lack of coverage of them. He decided to focus on people over the age of 100 — a very rare demographic indeed. The 2020 U.S. Census recorded 80,139 people aged 100 or older, a 50.2% increase from the 53,364 centenarians counted in 2010. As our aging population continues to increase, and technology evolves along with it, it's likely these incredibly photo essays will become far more common. But for now, they are an incredible reminder of how precious and valuable life is, sometimes especially when we reach our golden years.

“One should live every single moment according to their best knowledge and conscience because one day we will see clearly what has a real value," Langer says of what he learned from his subjects while photographing them.

The series was originally part of a story that Langer did for the Czech news outlet aktuálně.cz. You can see more photos from the portrait sessions by following the link.

This article originally appeared seven years ago.

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Celebrity

Tanner from ‘Love on the Spectrum’ meets Jack Black in wholesome moment on 'Kelly Clarkson'

Kelly Clarkson was amazed.

Photo Credit: Stefan Brending and Eva Rinaldi|Wikimedia

Tanner from 'Love on the Spectrum' meets Jack Black

There's nothing like meeting a celebrity you admire, even when you're somewhat of a celebrity yourself. Tanner Smith from the hit Netflix series Love on the Spectrum has the perfect age picked out for when he meets one of his favorite celebrities: Jack Black. Smith is autistic and likes to plan ahead for events based on the age he'll be when they happen.

Recently Smith appeared on The Kelly Clarkson Show to talk about how dating was going and to offer other life updates. To Clarkson's surprise, Smith has been doing quite a bit of traveling outside of work and was recently a groomsman for his sister Taylor's wedding. But it was his determination to achieve certain goals by a certain age that struck Clarkson as genius, and she was inspired to help him meet one by secretly planning it herself.

While talking to Clarkson, the excited man shares that he plans to meet one of his favorite actors, Jack Black, when he's 31—which was news to the host. Smith is currently 25, so meeting the School of Rock star wasn't on his radar for this year or any time soon, especially since he already got a video call with him last year on Clarkson's show. That made the surprise all the more exciting.

Jack Black, school or rock, actor, celebrity, filmsalutes jack black GIFGiphy

To cue up the surprise, Clarkson played a video of Black saying, "What's up Tanner? Jack Black here. I still cannot wait to meet you in person but I'm on the road with a Minecraft movie right now, but luckily, I have insane-ninja-kung fu-powers, which means I can come through these doors and I'm gonna...I'm gonna see you right now when I come through these doors..." before opening the double doors and running onstage.

Jack Black, dance, celebrity, gif, school of rockjack black happy dance GIFGiphy

Smith immediately stood up and ran to hug Black excitedly repeating, "Jack, I'm so happy I finally get to meet you!" The two hugged for what seemed to be about 20 seconds before Smith broke to introduce the actor to his sister who was sitting onstage with him. Clarkson prompts the pair to sit down after Smith got carried away pointing his family in the audience out to Black. When they finally do sit down, Smith is overcome with excitement.

Smith tells Black that he's strong and happy to meet him. Clarkson interjects to apologize that the meeting came before his goal age of 31, but she couldn't get over the excitement exuding from Smith. When Black said maybe they could work out together, the man loudly whispered that he could get the actor's phone number and make plans to go to the gym. This was peak vicarious excitement for the show host because she doubled over with joy.

Watch the wholesome moment below:

Black comments on them both being on tour to which Smith responds, "We're busy guys aren't we, Jack!" The interaction between the two men is contagiously joyful. In the end, Smith was given tickets to see Black in the new Minecraft movie in Imax with his family. Maybe during his next visit to The Kelly Clarkson Show, he and Black will get to head to the gym for that workout.

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Mental Health

Guy's brutally honest breakup text goes viral and reminds everyone that 'ghosting' isn't cool

This is the ideal example of how to let someone down easy.

via Shuttershock

Ghosting just isn't okay.

All too often, people leave a date with no idea how the other person feels about them. And if you're not into the other person, it can be stressful trying to gauge how they feel about the situation and ultimately what you should do moving forward.

Should you go ahead and have another date to see if something blossoms? Will it come across as presumptuous to let them down? If they're not into you either, will they make you feel stupid for laying out the reasons you don't want to go out again? Or is it leading someone on to stay mum about the lack of connection?

While there's no easy way to navigate letting a date down, avoiding these awkward conversations oftentimes results in the awful trend of ghosting, which leaves one person completely in the emotional lurch.

Ghosting may sound harmless at first, but it's actually a harmful (and totally lame) way to treat another person. It's especially gross when you consider that this other person is someone you invested time in and who invested time in you. Even if there was no spark or connection on one end, ghosting is essentially like throwing the other person away and acting as if they don't matter. There are many reasons why someone might ghost, but when you poke at them enough, they really don't hold any water. In an article for Psychology Today, Janneke M. Schokkenbroek, Ph.D., gives several reasons for why people ghost. Number one? Convenience.

ghosting, ghosted, dating, relationships, communication I Love You Lol GIF by LifetimeGiphy

Sure, it may be convenient to walk away from a situation and pretend it no longer exists, but this bit of convenience can be extremely damaging for the person on the receiving end. In fact, a lot of research has come out in the last several years outlining the harmful affects of ghosting on the mental health of both parties. Unfortunately, since ghosting is so common, it's rare to see healthy emotional rejection modeled online. In 2019, though, Reddit user karmabandido's shared a breakup text he sent to his date that quickly went viral for its honesty and clarity.


text, honesty, ghosting, dating, relationshipsA masterclass is classy dating.Via Reddit

This is an ideal example of how to let someone down easy. He was polite, respectful, and transparent about how feelings, wants, and needs. He didn't ghost her—but he also didn't mince words about the lack of connection.

In return, she was able to reveal that she felt the same way and they were able to avoid further awkward interactions without negging or having to resort to ghosting.

Bottom line: ghosting isn't nice and it isn't cool. Instead, be honest, open, and respectful because it treats other people with dignity. It may be hard, but kindly and clearly saying how you feel is the right thing to do, people appreciate it, and it goes a long way.

modern dating, dating, ghost, ghosting, ghosted, communication A little respect goes a long way.Image via Canva

This article was originally published six years ago. It has been updated.

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