upworthy
Add Upworthy to your Google News feed.
Google News Button
Family

17 assumptions modern newlyweds are sick of people making about their marriages.

Pro tip: Don't ask newlyweds about babies.

17 assumptions modern newlyweds are sick of people making about their marriages.


If you just got married, chances are lots of people think they know what your life is like.

These people are totally well-meaning! And also, mostly wrong.

Being married isn't exactly like it used to be. Which is great, as there are so many different, amazing ways to be newlyweds than ever before. But it's also occasionally frustrating, as we newlyweds are frequently forced to dispel a lot of myths about our relationships.

So let's get them out of the way in one fell swoop.

Here are the most common (but mistaken) assumptions strangers make when you're a newlywed couple, and what our lives are really like.


Assumption #1: We went on our honeymoon already, and we left right after the wedding.

Just like we imagined it. Because we did imagine it.

Photo via iStock.

Reality: In our dreams, we definitely did — and we had a great time!

In real life, however, most of us can't just take a week (or more) off work at will. The office is hella busy, and on top of that, we live in the only wealthy country in the world that doesn't mandate any paid vacation. Many of us were barely able to get the day of our actual wedding off (ultimately, we compromised with our manager and took a half-day).

We're planning to get to it ... eventually. But it might be a while. We promise we'll send pictures!

Assumption #2: We're going to have babies ASAP.

Yay?

Photo via iStock.

Reality: We love being married! But, you know, we actually haven't decided? About babies? We're just enjoying being married right now. But we'll let you know when it happens. We promise.

Assumption #3: We're going to move out of "the city" one day.

So many cheap noodles, so little time.

Photo by Anthony Quintano/Flickr.

Reality: It makes sense to assume that, like so many newly married couples in generations past, we're already planning our escape from our local metropolis to a less population-dense area TBD. But many of us who live in the city really, really like it! The city is great. There are good schools here. We can get nachos delivered at 3 a.m.! From either the good nacho place or the OK-but-cheap nacho place.

Sure, some of us are planning to one day move to the 'burbs for more space (and many already are), but many of us aren't. And still others of us who already live in the suburbs are making the suburbs more like the city.

Having a yard is really nice, but so is not having car insurance payments.

Assumption #4: We feel superior to our second-cousin Frieda whose boyfriend of 19 years still hasn't proposed.

Look! They seem happy!

Photo via iStock.

Reality: Even though we're feeling pretty good about being married, Frieda and Richard are adults and get to make their own decisions — no matter what Aunt Cindy thinks. Maybe they have financial reasons. Maybe they decided a long time ago they don't want to be married. Maybe they believe marriage is an oppressive, archaic, patriarchal institution that they don't want to participate in, and also they're vegan now.

In any case, leave Frieda and Richard alone.

Assumption #5: We're going to have babies soonish.

Aw?

Photo via iStock.

Reality: So, yeah. Like I said. Really haven't decided about babies. Keeping our options open. But probably not soon? You know?

Assumption #6: One of us changed our last name.

Uncanny, really.

Image by Mary Rose Pickett/Sketchport.


Reality: There's totally nothing wrong with couples who decide that one partner will take the other's last name, of course. But not all of us do. At least 1 in every 5 women decide to keep their maiden names, according to a New York Times survey. And if you haven't taken your partner's last name, it's kind of frustrating to constantly hear yourself referred to as Mr./Mrs. Someone Else (for opposite-gender couples, this pretty much applies exclusively to women).

If you're not sure what last name to use, just ask! We'll tell you what the deal is.

Assumption #7: We're having Guinness Book of World Records amounts of sex.

Photo via iStock.

Reality: For those of us who waited to have sex until marriage — which is, of course, totally cool — you might need a supercomputer to tabulate. But lots of us have been together for a long time already and may even have been living together already, so we're probably having whatever amount of sex is normal for us. It's just a regular part of our lives that throwing a wedding doesn't really have a magical impact on.

After many years in a relationship, most of us take "Netflix and chill" quite literally. And seriously.

Assumption #8: We've finished all our thank-you notes.

It. Just. Doesn't. Get. Easier.

Photo by happy_serendipity/Flickr.

Reality: Never. We'll be writing these until the end of time.

Assumption #9: Hanging out with one of us means hanging out with both of us.

You will listen to us talk about our trip to Block Island and you will enjoy it.

Photo via iStock.

Reality: We're still different people. Each of us is a self-sufficient being with free will. And we're probably totally down to hang out with you, even if our spouse isn't available.

Except you, Greg. We're totally avoiding you.

Assumption #10: We're going to have babies ever.

Bujjy bujjy boo?

Photo via iStock.

Reality: So um, like I said, there's actually a chance we might never have babies? We might decide we don't want them after all. We might find out we can't — in which case, these questions might become extremely invasive and painful. We might adopt a child ... who's not a baby. We haven't figured it out yet.

At the end of the day, It's kinda up to us, you know?

Assumption #11: We never use the garlic press you got us.

Such a great gift.

Photo by Lee Kindness/Wikimedia Commons.

Reality: We use it all the time! Thank you so much!

Assumption #12: One of us is going to stay home and take care of the house from here on in.

We will still make the hell out of some lemonade, though.

Photo via iStock.


Reality: Some of us might want to be a housewife or husband. Others of us shudder at the thought of giving up our careers, or urging our spouse to give up theirs. Still others of us might want to, but might not be able to forfeit the second income. There's really no right — or standard — way to do it anymore.

Assumption #13: We both have all the same likes, dislikes, preferences, outlooks, and opinions now.

Missy and I have been getting really into '80s ice dancing.

Photo via iStock.

Reality: My wife will never convince me to like jazz. And I will probably never convince her to like "Captain Phillips" fan fiction. And you know what? We're OK with that.

For the things that matter, we're committed to presenting a united front. But we're still individuals with different thoughts, feelings, and opinions about what Tom Hanks was up to two weeks before the Somali pirates attacked, 'cause honestly, that's where the real drama of the story probably is.

Assumption #14: We wear wedding rings.

Help. Someone glued our hands together. Please call the cops.

Photo by TanyaVdB/Pixabay.

Reality: Some of us like wearing a physical symbol of our connection and duty to our spouse. Some of us don't as much. So we don't wear them. But don't worry! We're still extreme double married 5000.

Assumption #15: Making us a pink cake that says "baby" on it is going to change our mind about babies.

Mmmmmmmm. Nope.

Photo by Frosted with Emotion/Flickr.

Reality: It won't. But we will definitely eat that cake.

Assumption #16: Our lives are a lot different now.

Married or not, we still have three more seasons of "Justified" to get through.

Photo via iStock.

Reality: Beginning roughly seven seconds after we say, "I do," lots and lots and lots of well-intentioned people ask: "How does it feel?!" seemingly expecting to hear: "So much has changed! We got matching ponies! Being married really is a whole new world!" It feels like we're disappointing them when we answer, "Pretty much the way we did the day before the wedding." Which is silly, since there's no shame in that.

For some couples, life is a lot different after marriage, and that's great. But if stuff is kinda sorta the same, that's OK too! Life was great before. That's why we decided to get married.

Assumption #17: If we're not going to lay out a precise plan for having babies, at least we'll probably get a pet.

Blah.

Photo by Madalena Provo, used with permission.


Reality: OK. This one is true.


This article originally appeared on 11.06.15









Joe grew up without stability. Now, he’s giving 10 adopted sons the home he never had.
True
Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption

Like many children who are placed in foster care across the United States, Joe’s childhood was marked by chaos and a struggle to survive.

Joe still remembers neglect and abuse being part of his daily reality. Often left to care for his younger siblings alone, Joe grew up far too quickly.


He and his brothers were placed in the New York foster care system at an early age. And when he aged out of foster care at 21, he had no family to turn to for support.

“Statistically, I should be in jail, or I could be dead,” Joe said. “But that’s not my destiny.”

Today, Joe is determined to change the trajectory for young people lingering in foster care … as an adoptive parent and as an advocate, raising awareness along with organizations like the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption.

A complex problem with an evidence-based solution

More than 100,000 children in the U.S. foster care system are waiting for a safe, permanent home. But the sad reality is that thousands will “age out” of the system between 18 and 21, stepping into adulthood without support, guidance or a safety net.

The consequences of this can be devastating. Youth who leave foster care without the support of a forever family are much more likely to experience negative outcomes, including homelessness, unemployment, substance abuse and early, unplanned parenthood.


Through its signature program, Wendy’s Wonderful Kids®, the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption is working to be a part of the solution across the U.S. and Canada. Through this program, the Foundation supports the hiring of adoption professionals — known as recruiters — who serve children most at risk of aging out of foster care, including older children, children with special needs and siblings.

Wendy’s Wonderful Kids recruiters use an evidence-based, child-focused model, identifying trusted adults in the child’s network who may be open to adoption — and research shows that it works. A five-year, national evaluation showed that children referred to the program are up to three times more likely to be adopted.

Changing the journey for a new generation

Xavier was 18 and at risk of aging out of foster care without family support when he met Joe.

“My biggest fear was that I was going to age out and not know how to be sufficient on my own,” Xavier said. But Joe adopted Xavier just weeks before he was set to age out of the system. In the years that followed, Joe adopted from foster care again. And again.

Today, Joe is a father to 10 sons, seven of whom were adopted with help from the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption.

“Meeting my boys has put them on a different path,” Joe said. “Wendy’s Wonderful Kids was a real support and guide to being able to do what I try to do: making sure they have the tools to survive.”

“For me, it’s been beautiful to see that [my brothers are] spreading out to go live their own lives,” Xavier said. “It’s something [Joe] has prepared us for. He gave us the mentality that we could do whatever we want.”

Writing a new ending

After aging out of foster care, Joe managed to defy the odds, graduating from college and becoming a school counselor. Still, despite his own success story, he knows that many children who spend time in foster care aren’t as fortunate.

Joe hopes providing a “home base” for his sons means a brighter future for them.

“Here, we have people you can call your family — your brothers, your father,” Joe said. “Everybody, no matter where they are, knows that they can come home.”

Learn more about the Dave Thomas Foundation for Adoption and how you can help find forever families for more children lingering in foster care right now.

empty nester, empty nesters, declutter, decluttering, decluttering tips

Mom and empty nester shares her tips for decluttering her home.

Deep cleaning and decluttering a home is a daunting task—especially for empty nesters. After spending a lifetime creating memories and living together under one roof, doing a big declutter can take an emotional toll.

It's a milestone that many empty nesters know the sting of. And in an cleaning community on Reddit, a 51-year-old mom and recent empty nester shared her experience cleaning and decluttering her home after entering this new phase of life.


"In my entire life, my house has always been messy. I mean, I didn’t have a disaster-level situation going on, but if someone dropped by unannounced, it would’ve been super embarrassing," she shared. "When my kids were younger, we had a housekeeper because I just couldn’t keep up. Now that we’re empty nesters, I realized I never really learned how to keep house."

- YouTube www.youtube.com

She explained that the book Unf*ck Your Habitat: You're Better Than Your Mess played an integral part in helping her declutter—and offered eight helpful tips to fellow empty nesters looking to organize their new lives.

1. Put stuff away, not down.

Her first tip is the key to decluttering.

"Whatever you have goes right back where it’s supposed to go when I’m done with it," she notes.

2. Do laundry every day.

And she doesn't just wash and dry her laundry when doing it.

"Just one load, start to finish. Wash, dry, fold, and put away," she shares. "Also, no chair or floor laundry. It gets put in the hamper or hung back up. No clothes are ever out."

3. I make the bed every day.

The benefits keep on giving by doing this, she notes.

"It just makes my bedroom look cleaner and I smile every time I come in my room," she writes. "Plus we aren’t fighting over the covers when we get in because the bed is straightened out."

- YouTube www.youtube.com

4. Do a quick daily clean-up of commonly used spaces.

She cleans the places that her and her husband use frequently.

"I keep a stack of cleaning rags in my master bath because it’s the only bathroom that’s used every single day. Every night, I spray the counter, wipe everything down, put everything back (that my husband leaves out), and wipe the mirror," she explains. "I also wipe down the toilet. I find that I don’t need a huge, big cleaning of this space because I’m keeping it up daily. Same goes for the kitchen."

5. Dishes are always put away, cabinet or dishwasher.

No dishes in the sink or stuck in the dishwasher.

"Dishes are finished in the dishwasher? It’s emptied and dirty ones are placed inside while waiting for the dishwasher to get full," she notes.

@brunchwithbabs

Life Changing Dishwasher Hack #tutorials #kitchenhacks #parentsoftiktok #dishwasherhack

6. Don't neglect your shoes.

When she takes them off, they get put away.

"Shoes are put away immediately upon walking in the house," she shares.

7. Knock out small tasks.

There is no time to waste.

"If it takes less than 5 minutes clean it while you’re waiting for something else to get done," she writes.

8. Take no days off.

Rather than assign certain days for cleaning, she is constantly doing it throughout the week.

"Lastly, I do not have scheduled cleaning days. I just do something all the time," she explains. "My life is kind of unpredictable, we love traveling or going out for the day so my so called cleaning schedule would be shot to hell every time. It’s better this way, because now I never feel behind."

how to start a conversation, conversation starter, conversation starters, conversation questions, small talk

The best conversation starters to ask during small talk.

Knowing how to start a conversation in a new social or professional setting can be difficult. Small talk can quickly become dull and uncomfortable.

Whether you're returning to work in the office or trying to make new friends in a new city, it can help to have a few conversation starters prepared. The key to engaging people is to start with open-ended questions.


"The best format for conversation starters is to use an open-ended question that allows the other person to speak openly and freely in a casual and comfortable way," Amy Arias, M.A., senior lecturer of communications studies at the University of Nevada, Reno, tells Upworthy.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Looking for unique conversation starters that will draw people in? Here are 10 questions to get the conversation going:

"What’s giving you energy right now?"

"This question prompts people to move from surface-level small talk to a genuine connection," leadership strategist and executive coach Stacy McCracken, founder & CEO of Impact and Lead, tells Upworthy. "It invites the other person to share. It’s present, personal, and lets you see what’s fueling them—whether that’s a project, a person, or a long-overdue break. It works because it’s about emotion, not status."

"What's the story behind your name?"

"This one usually gets people immediately to connect and share," public speaking expert LaQuita Cleare, founder & CEO at Clear Communication Academy, tells Upworthy. "It allows you to learn a little bit more about the person, the family, and the culture. It's a quick and meaningful way for people to let their guards down and simply tell you a story."

"What’s something your younger self would be proud you’re doing now?"

"I personally love this question, and even ask it to my clients all the time," Cheryl Groskopf, LMFT, LPCC, an anxiety, trauma, and attachment therapist in Los Angeles, tells Upworthy. "This kind of question lights up the inner child and the present-day self, which makes it emotionally rich. It also tends to lead into the stuff people don’t usually talk about first: healing, change, confidence, effort."

"What’s something fun (show, hobby, or place you discovered) that you’ve been enjoying lately?"

"This open-ended question gives people multiple ways to connect (entertainment, activities, experiences), making it easy and low-pressure to engage," Arias notes. "It also naturally leads to follow-up questions and shared stories."

"If you could plan your perfect weekend, what would it look like?"

"It invites the person to share personal preferences and values (adventure vs. relaxation, social vs. solo time) while keeping the tone warm and imaginative," Arias explains. "It encourages playful conversation and creates space for finding compatibility and shared interests. It's worth noting that an effective conversation starter in a romantic context is often not, in nature, romantic."

@kiersay

Replying to @Jordan Di487 QUESTIONS FOR BETTER CONVERSATION (part 4) #conversationstarters #questionoftheday #questionsforcouples #ditchthesmalltalk

"What's your favorite place to spend your downtime?"

"This tells you a lot about a person and is a nice intro question that does not pry too much," Cleare shares. "This is also a great one to find common ground, which is what you want to keep the conversation going."

"What’s something that’s caught your curiosity lately?"

"I love this one because curiosity is the spark of every great conversation," adds McCracken. "It opens space for people to share what’s lighting them up—a topic, a hobby, or even a random fact. Curiosity connects people faster than credentials ever will."

"What’s something you wish more people asked you about?"

"Everyone has a part of their life they love but no one ever brings up, like a weird skill, a quiet win, a topic they never get to share," Groskopf shares. "This question lets people steer the conversation toward something that ACTUALLY excites them. It’s casual, but opens a door you normally wouldn’t walk through."

"What do you love about your job?"

"This one is always fun because if they love their job, their eyes light up and they start telling your stories and if they hate their job, that also brings a fun moment and an eye roll," says Cleare.

"What’s surprised you lately?"

"This one always brings out thoughtful, funny, or even vulnerable stories," McCracken says. "It nudges people to reflect—and reflection is where real connection happens. It’s the perfect balance of light and meaningful."

Popular

15 old-school casserole recipes that feel like home for boomers and Gen Xers

Tried-and-true one-pan dinners from back in the day.

casserole, casseroles, casserole recipe, casserole recipes, gen x, boomers
Image via Reddit/MyDogGoldi

Vintage casserole recipes from Gen X and boomer childhoods.

Childhood dishes can take you straight back to your seat at the family dinner table. Comfort meals that were served there are uber nostalgic. And there is one dish represents the epitome of Gen X and baby boomer childhoods: casseroles.

These one-dish wonders were loaded with flavor and baked to perfection. Pulled straight from the oven to the dinner table, casseroles filled the house with the smell of unique home-cooked recipes.


And while most of us are eating casseroles today at Thanksgiving, Gen Xers and boomers grew up eating casseroles on the reg.

Here are 15 old-school casserole recipes that Redditors grew up eating, which are just as yummy today:

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Chicken casseroles

Fancy Fast Chicken casserole

"Fancy Fast Chicken is delicious and so simple. Line up chicken breasts in a casserole dish. Dump uncooked stuffing over top the chicken breasts. Pour Cream of Mushroom (Onion or chicken works too) and incorporate it into the stuffing. Top with cheese of your choice, and fried onions if you're inclined. Bake at 350 for 45min or until chicken is thoroughly cooked." - Applepoisoneer

Chicken Curry Divan casserole

"My favorite is Chicken Curry Divan. A friend made it for me in college 40 years ago and it is a favorite to this day. Never disappoints. Many people have asked me for the recipe over the years. My best friends kids now that they are grown have each approached me for it.

1 1/2 lbs chicken breast tenders cooked and cut into bite sized pieces
3 cups broccoli in bite sized pieces
2 cans Cream of Chicken soup
1 cup mayonnaise (must be Mayo)
2 tsp curry
Juice of 1 lemon
Shredded sharp cheddar (use the amount you like o like a nice even cover of the top)
3/4 cup crushed Ritz crackers
3 tbsp melted butter
In 9x13” baking pan layer chicken then broccoli.

Mix the soup, Mayo, lemon juice and curry together well, pour over chicken broccoli mixture evenly and smooth out. Sprinkle cheese over top evenly. Crush crackers fine, mix in melted butter well and sprinkle evenly over top. Cook at 375° for 25-30 minutes until bubbly and top brown. Serve with rice." - karinchup

Chicken and Rice casserole

"This baked rice & cheese casserole has become a staple in our house! It’s great as a side dish, or I’ll add rotisserie chicken and serve it as a main dish." - anchovypepperonitoni

Chicken & Dumplings casserole

"The secret of this is not to stir anything. That's what makes your dumplings. When you dish it out, you have your dumplings on top.
2 chicken breasts, cooked and shredded; 2 cups chicken broth; 1/2 stick of butter; 2 cups Bisquick mix; 2 cups whole milk; 1 can cream of chicken soup; 1/2 medium onion, minced; 1 cup frozen peas; 3 tsp chicken Better Than Bouillon; 1/2 tsp dried sage; 1 tsp black pepper; 1/2 tsp salt.

(1) Preheat oven to 350 degrees
(2) Layer 1 - In 9x13 casserole dish, melt 1/2 stick of butter. Spread shredded chicken over butter. Sprinkle black pepper and dried sage over this layer. Do not stir.
(3) Layer 2 - Sprinkle minced onions and peas over chicken
(4) Layer 3 - In small bowl, mix milk and Bisquick. Slowly pour all over chicken. Do not stir.
(5) Layer 4 - In medium bowl, whisk together 2 cups of chicken broth, chicken bouillon, and soup. Once blended, slowly pour over the Bisquick layer. Do not stir.
(6) Bake casserole for 30-40 minutes, or until the top is golden brown." - Superb_Yak7074

Chicken broccoli casserole

"I made chicken broccoli casserole last week and that's a favorite here. This is pretty close to how I do it." - gimmethelulz

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Potato casseroles

Funeral Potatoes

"The unfortunately named, funeral potatoes!" - IRLperson

Tater Tot casserole

"Tater tot casserole. My mom made this at least once a week when I was growing up, but she added a quart of green beans to make it a meal. If you brown your ground beef in a good size cast iron skillet, you only dirty up one pan to make it!" - hcynthia1234, upperwareParTAY

Breakfast casserole

"I’m making a breakfast casserole this morning for brunch later—a bag of frozen hash brown potatoes thawed, a pound of sausage sauteed with peppers and onions, a brick of cheese grated, eight eggs beaten with a bit of milk and cream and some salt and pepper. Layer in a casserole, ending with cheese. Bake around an hour at 375." - CWrend

Hamburger pie casserole

"One of my childhood favorites. Did not add vegetables or cheese though. This was an end of the month struggle meal that everyone loved." - DarnHeather

Shepherd's pie casserole

"Shepherd's pie : brown 1.5 lbs ground beef with half a chopped onion, salt and pepper, drain it and then spread into a 13x9 and stir a can of cream of mushroom soup into it. Spread a drained family size can of corn on top, use a container of prepared mashed potatoes for the top layer. Bake for a half hour at 350." - ExplanationLucky1143

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Noodle casseroles

Tuna casserole

"Love my mom's tuna noodle casserole: 1 bag broad egg noodles, 1 can cream of mushroom soup, 2 cans tuna, 1 cup frozen corn or 1 can kernel corn, 2 cups shredded sharp cheddar cheese, 1/2 cup seasoned bread crumbs, 1 tbsp celery salt
Cook noodles per package directions, drain, then place in a 13x9 casserole dish. Mix in cream of mushroom soup, tuna, corn, 1 cup of the cheddar cheese, and celery salt. Top the casserole with the remaining cheese and bread crumbs. Bake at 350 for 20 minutes or until done enough for you." - Pinkleton

Mock Stroganoff casserole

"Mock stroganoff - brown 1lb ground chuck. Mix in 8 oz sour cream and 1 can cream of mushroom. Add to 1 lb of cooked egg noodles. Season with black pepper. Extras - fresh mushrooms and/or onion cooked with the beef. Any precooked veggies of your choice, peas or broccoli work well. Splash of Worcestershire, soy sauce, or fish sauce. Garlic or onion powder. Parsley, thyme, or cilantro." - Nathan_Saul

Cabbage noodle casserole

"I have a quick cabbage and noodles that uses bagged cole slaw. Cook a bag of noodles. Put aside. Cut up a lb of bacon and a med onion. Cook in pan until bacon is slightly fried and onions are clear. Add cabbage(without carrots) let sit 10 min or so. Add to noodles. It's so easy." - conjas11

@allrecipes

Thanksgiving prep class is now in session! 🍂🧑‍🏫 If there's one thing you need to nail on the big day (other than the turkey, of course), it's Green Bean Casserole. This recipe tastes just like the one your grandmother used to make, if not even better! 😋 Continue reading or click the link in the @allrecipes bio to get the full recipe. Ingredients: 2 (15-ounce) cans cut green beans, drained 1 (10.5-ounce) can condensed cream of mushroom soup ¾ cup milk 1 (2.8-ounce) can French fried onions salt and ground black pepper to taste Directions: Gather all ingredients. Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Mix green beans, condensed cream of mushroom soup, milk, and 1/2 of the fried onions in a 1.5-quart casserole dish. Bake in the preheated oven until heated through and bubbly, about 25 minutes. Sprinkle remaining onions on top and return to the oven for 5 minutes. Season with salt and pepper to taste. Let rest for a few minutes before serving. 🧑‍🍳: Nicole #thanksgiving #greenbeancasserole #greenbeans #thanksgivingsides

Vegetable casseroles

Green bean casserole

"This is the best green bean casserole recipe, it does use the canned onions but you make your own cream of mushroom and it's soooo good. I've made it on random weekends, it's not just a Thanksgiving food. I don't know much about older foods, I just really wanted to share that recipe."

Corn casserole

"Our family Corn custard doesn't have crackers but we double the recipe and there's never any left over. 2 eggs, 1 cup of sweetened condensed milk, 1/2 flour, 2 T soft butter, 1 tsp sugar, 1 can of creamed corn, 1 can of whole corn. Mix all together and bake in a 8x8 about 45 min at 350. Gotta have that!" - Psychological_Bat890

dog, dog breeds, bond with dog, emotional bond, emotional bond with dog

Dog breeds that form strong emotional bonds with owners.

Dogs are arguably the most loyal pets. Besides being goofy and always a reliable source of entertainment, dogs are the ultimate companions. But did you know certain dog breeds form deeper, stronger emotional ties to their owners than others?

"Like people, dogs are individuals with their own unique temperaments and personalities," Dr. Liza Cahn, DVM, a veterinarian at Embrace Pet Insurance, tells Upworthy. "There are certain breeds known to bond especially deeply with their owners, many of which have a history of working closely and cooperatively with people."


She explains that strong emotional bonds are also influenced not only by breed, but by other factors such as early life experiences, socialization, training, age, and health status.

- YouTube www.youtube.com

Dr. Cahn adds that there are definite signs that your dog is strongly bonded to you.

"Regardless of breed, signs that you and your dog have a strong bond include seeking out attention, play, and physical contact, relaxed body language in your presence, frequently checking in with you, and going to you for comfort," she says.

The following are five dog breeds that typically build the strongest emotional bond with their owners.

dog, dog snuggle, dog cuddle, dog best friend, dog hug barkpost GIF Giphy

Golden Retriever

According to Dr. Cahn, Golden Retrievers are "famously gentle and loyal, known for their joyful and boisterous playfulness and affection. Goldens were bred as hunting dogs, are highly intelligent, and have a strong desire to please. Their natural friendliness and outgoing personalities make them excellent family pets. Many Goldens demonstrate tight bonds through gentle eye contact, bringing toys to initiate play, and following their owners from room to room."

Labrador Retriever

Labs are another breed that are known to form strong emotional bonds with their owners.

"Bred as versatile working dogs, Labs are intelligent and easy to train (highly motivated by both food and human affection). Their playful and outgoing personality means they usually get along well with children and other animals, and they enjoy an active lifestyle by their owner’s side," says Dr. Cahn. "They show their bond through constant tail-wagging, leaning against their owners, and eagerness to participate in any activity together. Labs are often prone to obesity and joint issues, so regular veterinary care and portion control are important."

Vizsla

If you own a Vizsla, this will not be a surprise to you.

"Vizslas are often nicknamed 'Velcro dogs' because their deep bond and attachment to their human family members cause them to stick close," Dr. Cahn explains. "They were originally bred for falconry and love working closely with humans, a trait that has translated into a desire for constant companionship. These highly affectionate dogs also require extensive physical exercise and mental stimulation, and can be prone to separation anxiety."

@drkatrinawarren

Velcro Dogs - a dog can be clingy for lots of reasons eg.lack of socialisation, anxiety, a traumatic or learnt behaviour but some dog breeds are more likely to be ‘velcro dogs’ #velcrodogs #dogbreeds #cockerspaniel

Cavalier King Charles Spaniel

With such a lovable face, it's no wonder that the Cavalier King Charles Spaniel is known to be tight with its owners.

"Bred over centuries to be the ultimate companion dog, these sweethearts are bright, affectionate, and curious. They can thrive in just about any environment as long as they receive plenty of love and attention," Dr. Cahn notes. "Cavaliers form exceptionally close attachments and love to cuddle, rest their head on their owner’s lap, and maintain eye contact. Their gentle temperament and eager-to-please attitude make them deeply attuned to their person’s emotions."

She also adds that finding a reputable breeder is critical due to their predisposition to a heart condition affecting the mitral valve, as well as a neurological condition called syringomyelia.

Cocker Spaniel

According to Dr. Cahn, both English and American Cocker Spaniels are gentle and happy dogs.

"They have a long history of working closely with human partners and thrive on love and attention," she says. "Cockers often express their bond by wagging their entire body, shadowing their owners around the house, and greeting them enthusiastically. Keep an eye out for symptoms of ear infections, which are common due to their long, floppy ears."

Community

Introverts can be stellar networkers with 6 small shifts in their habits and mindset

Introverts are better networkers than people think, especially when they play to their strengths.

networking, introverts, socializing, professional network, communication skills

Introverts have a lot of strengths that make them good networkers.

If you want to send most introverts running for the hills, all you have to do is mention the word "networking." The term immediately conjures images of large rooms full of people mingling, making small talk and selling themselves, all of which is nightmare fuel for those of us who thrive on intimate spaces with close friends and plenty of time alone.

The entire concept of networking may seem custom suited to social butterflies, therefore giving them an advantage in the professional world, but introverts need not give up on the idea altogether. Introverts are not inherently bad at networking; in fact, when they play to their strengths, introverts can make the best networkers.


@graceforpersonalityhires

When they’re good, they’re damn good. #corporatetiktok #corporatelife #softskills #introvert #introvertsbelike #genzatwork

Think quality, not quantity

The idea of milling around a big room of people, meeting as many potential connections as possible, is anathema to an introvert's nature. Give yourself permission to not even try to do that. Make it a goal to talk to three people and three people only.

"Rather than expending your energy talking to as many people as possible, play to your strengths and aim to forge strong bonds with a smaller group of people," suggests EHL Graduate School.

Making three solid connections is far more doable for introverts than collecting as many business cards and contacts as possible.

Lean into listening and empathy

Most introverts have key people skills that may not be as flashy as charm and charisma, but ultimately lead to stronger connections. Usually, introverts are excellent listeners, and combined with empathy, that skill is incredibly valuable in networking. After all, what is networking but relationship-building, and what is better for relationship-building than stellar listening and empathy skills?

networking, introverts, socializing, professional network, communication skills Introverts tend to be good at listening and empathy.Photo credit: Canva

Arrive early and leave early

EHL Graduate School suggests introverts arrive at networking events early, when there are fewer people there, and leave early before their social battery runs out. If you're going with the "get to know three people" approach, there's no harm in leaving early.

Own the follow-up

Grace McCarrick, who speaks on workplace soft skills, shared one of the strengths she sees in introverts:

"An introvert is the kind of person who will meet you at an event, not really say too much, then follow up with an email or a Linkedin message and say, 'Great to meet you. Here's an article on this thing we were talking about.' I'm sorry, that is elite. That is elite level."

networking, introverts, socializing, professional network, communication skills A lot of introverts struggle with networking.Photo credit: Canva

Practice a few key social skills ahead of time

Sometimes introversion gets conflated with shyness or social anxiety, but regardless of how these things might overlap, practicing a few key skills can help anyone feel more confident going into a socializing situation. If you struggle with starting conversations, prepare a few conversation starters ahead of time. If you don't know how to leave a conversation, practice some key phrases for ducking out. If nervousness is your nemesis, learn some confident body language tricks to get over (or at least cover up) your imposter syndrome.

Ditch 'events' altogether and focus on one-on-ones

Networking doesn't have to involve going to events or gatherings and overtaxing yourself socially. At its core, networking is just connecting with people, and you can just as easily do that with one-on-one meetings, lunches, or coffee dates. Seek out people you want to make connections with online and reach out personally. That might still be a bit nerve-racking, but for introverts it's often a better tack to take than torturing yourself with big events with too many people.

networking, introverts, socializing, professional network, communication skills One-on-one networking is preferable for introverts.Photo credit: Canva

Introverts aren't inherently bad at networking. In fact, there's an argument to be made that introverts make the best networkers in the long run, as they tend to make deeper than surface-level connections and excel at relationship-building.